AN: Aack. I know I said that I'd do "String Theory" asSeii's
birthday gift. Why this instead? Well, I had very little time to write and
writer's block, so "String Theory" is at present about two paragraphs long...
ouch. Considering this is already late, I decided to throw together a short
little ficcie... and here is the result.
I sat as part of the congregation. Most of the people around me were either happy for the soon-to-be-weds or sad because the aforementioned bride and groom were "all grown up and leaving us now." I was reasonably certain that I was the only person there who sat without emotion of some sort.
No, I did feel somthing. Just—I'm notsure stunned shock is an emotion.
The readings were over, and now Mimi was walking up the aisle to join her fiancé. She looked absolutely beautiful in her dress. Though as a maleI'm probably not the best judge of such things, Matt also looked pretty good.It was one of those magazine-cover marriages.
Those marriages don't tend to last.
Mimi had joined Matt, and the organ had stopped playing. The priest called out, almost mechanically, "If there is anything that would serve as an impediment to this union, tell of it. Speak now or forever hold your peace."
I could have spoken then. I could have protested. But why? I had nothing to go on. Sure, I thought the marriage would collapse. But though I might be bearer of Knowledge, I'm by no means omniscient. And since I couldn't point to any specific thing, I wouldn't be believed anyway. What right had I to say anything? What right had I to deny them happiness? If it was happiness, anyway.
Why was I so intent on this anyway? What made me so set on stopping them? I'm certain that if it were just that I didn't think this could work, I wouldn't be so upset. But I couldn't let Mimi do something that might destroy her life.
Worried about just Mimi? That's it. You have an advanced case of jealousy, Izzy. That's all.
As I walked up the aisle, I was paralyzed with fear. Why was I doing this? Was this the right choice? I noticed Izzy's eyes boring into me accusingly. He had never approved of me marrying Matt. Why not? He didn't think it would last.
He'd told me just the day before, "Mimi, you should call this off. You and Matt are too alike and too different for this to ever work."
Of course, I've always been stubborn. I didn't listen, simply because I felt he had no right to tell me what to do. But maybe I should have taken his advice more seriously. It was intended that way.
I reached the end of my walk, and Matt came to join me. In a loud, clear voice, the priest recited the vows. Matt replied, "I do."
"And do you, Tachikawa Mimi, take Ichida Yamato to be...all the days of your life?"
I paused for a second. This was too big a commitment to make, unsure.
Ironic that the bearer of Sincerity would know her own mind this badly. That's
what it all came down to. Could I speak those next two words sincerely? It
was important, more so for me than for anyone else, to not make this promise
if it was one I could not keep.I sat as part of the congregation. Most of the people around me were either happy for the soon-to-be-weds or sad because the aforementioned bride and groom were "all grown up and leaving us now." I was reasonably certain that I was the only person there who sat without emotion of some sort.
No, I did feel somthing. Just—I'm notsure stunned shock is an emotion.
The readings were over, and now Mimi was walking up the aisle to join her fiancé. She looked absolutely beautiful in her dress. Though as a maleI'm probably not the best judge of such things, Matt also looked pretty good.It was one of those magazine-cover marriages.
Those marriages don't tend to last.
Mimi had joined Matt, and the organ had stopped playing. The priest called out, almost mechanically, "If there is anything that would serve as an impediment to this union, tell of it. Speak now or forever hold your peace."
I could have spoken then. I could have protested. But why? I had nothing to go on. Sure, I thought the marriage would collapse. But though I might be bearer of Knowledge, I'm by no means omniscient. And since I couldn't point to any specific thing, I wouldn't be believed anyway. What right had I to say anything? What right had I to deny them happiness? If it was happiness, anyway.
Why was I so intent on this anyway? What made me so set on stopping them? I'm certain that if it were just that I didn't think this could work, I wouldn't be so upset. But I couldn't let Mimi do something that might destroy her life.
Worried about just Mimi? That's it. You have an advanced case of jealousy, Izzy. That's all.
As I walked up the aisle, I was paralyzed with fear. Why was I doing this? Was this the right choice? I noticed Izzy's eyes boring into me accusingly. He had never approved of me marrying Matt. Why not? He didn't think it would last.
He'd told me just the day before, "Mimi, you should call this off. You and Matt are too alike and too different for this to ever work."
Of course, I've always been stubborn. I didn't listen, simply because I felt he had no right to tell me what to do. But maybe I should have taken his advice more seriously. It was intended that way.
I reached the end of my walk, and Matt came to join me. In a loud, clear voice, the priest recited the vows. Matt replied, "I do."
"And do you, Tachikawa Mimi, take Ichida Yamato to be...all the days of your life?"
The priest ended the uncomfortable silence by repeating his question. And this time I knew how to reply. But I could hardly say, "I don't know. Do I?" as my response. It would create such a scandal.
But to say otherwise would be a lie.
So I lied. "I don't." With time to think, maybe, I could walk down that aisle again. Maybe to Matt, maybe to someone else. But whoever it was, it wouldn't be for a while.
"Sincerity's saying what truth you know; knowledge is knowing what truth you say."
I thought I could hardly be more shocked, ten seconds before. I thought that it was enough shock for a lifetime that Mimi had thrown my advice to the wind and persisted in the marriage.
A lot can change in ten seconds.
After Mimi's momentous answer, a silence more complete and much more uncomfortable than the previous one fell. Then it was broken by hushed whispers. An embarassed Mimi just ran back down the aisle, blinking back tears. Probably wondering what in either world had possessed her to say that.
I was the only one who followed her. I confronted her in the foyer, where she was crying more openly.
"It's okay, Mimi. You can probably go back up there and take your vows."
"I thought you were against the marriage."
"I still am. But it's your decision. My Knowledge has its limits. Only you know your heart."
"Even I don't know it. And it's too big a promise to make if it's one I won't keep."
"Take some time to think then, Mimi. Don't close this door completely, even if you refuse to step through."
"Why were you against us anyway?"
"Maybe we can meet later to discuss that."
Not only does the bearer of Sincerity know her own heart the worst of anyone, she's now on a date with someone other than her fiancé. Aren't life's little ironies so wonderful?
Aack. Not only am I turning ironic, I'm also becoming cynical and sarcastic. A far departure from the innocent little girl who stood scared and awed to recieve the Crest of Sincerity.
"So why were you so against the marriage, Izzy?"
"Looking back, it was probably mostly out of jealousy. Still, I honestly don't think things could work out between you and Matt."
"Why not?"
"May I speak bluntly?"
"Yes."
"You're one of those obvious, magazine-cover marriages. But those don't last any longer than three weeks maximum. Matt has a tendency to sort of... retreat within himself. The first time he did that when you wanted to talk, you'd phone a lawyer about divorce."
I flared up within myself, wanting to scream at Izzy for that insult. But I quelled that urge and thought about what he had actually said. He had a point, thinking about it. Matt really wasn't the gregarious kind, for all he bore Friendship.
Matt wasn't really the gregarious kind. But I was. I remembered some fights we'd had, when I'd wanted to go to a party and he just wanted a quiet, private date. Usually we both lost in the compromise. I'd go to the dance... alone. Matt would stay away from other people... completely.
Yet we'd stayed together despite that. Surely there was something behind us to make us stay together.
Popular expectation. We'd dated because everyone wanted the social butterfly and the rock star to stay together.
So I could listen to the whims of the "in crowd" with regard to love but not to an old trusted friend? Baaad choice, Mimi.
Then I mused on what Izzy had said first. Mostly out of jealousy?
A year later...
A apprehensive grin spread across my face and I looked at Matt, our best man.
"It'll be fine, Izzy. The worst that can happen is a repeat of last time... and Mimi probably knows better now."
"You're sure this time, Mimi?" Yolei joked.
"Not funny. Yes, I'm certain. Besides, last time I nearly twisted my ankle, and the shoes I'm wearing now are even worse for running in."
"She's just trying to lighten you up, Mi-chan," Kari said. "Not good to be so nervous."
I looked at my two bridesmaids and heard the organ play. Quickly snatching up my bouquet, I walked.
The second time around, there were no mishaps. Both Izzy and Mimi said their "I do"s without problems. And time proved them right.