If anyone wants to read the NC-17 version of this fic, go to my livejournal. I had no guts to post it here. http://demoka. had never forgiven herself for falling for her best friend's brother's fiancé. Well, now it was ex-fiancé. But then again, she had also decided to go where the wind blew her, loving those who loved her and not discriminating because of sex or history. Their little tryst in the bride's room had be discovered by Ginny. At the time, Ron had the gall to continue filming. Hermione stopped talking to him when he refused to destroy the tape. Harry had merely fainted in shock. He tended to faint much more often nowadays. The various mediwitches at St Mungo's believed it was incurable, as he was after all, the Boy Who Lived And Did Not Need To Have An Excuse For Anything He Did.
Ron, despite his brother's broken heart remained firmly loyal to his bushy haired friend, claiming that Fleur must have used her Veela charms on her as he believed she never turned them off around him. Harry shook his head wishing to remain out of any future wars or battles. The death of Voldemort caused Harry to revile having to cause the death of anything, even evil mosquitoes.
Fleur sighed, wishing that she had never even thought of looking in Hermione Granger's direction. She had Bill Weasley, a wonderfully caring and handsome man. She didn't need the love of any other and yet she craved the attention of the bushy haired younger woman. However, really in truth, she did not regret loving Hermione, only regretting that she had to break Bill's heart in the process. She loved them both, but more so towards Hermione. In the end, Bill had taken the news well enough, wishing them both happiness.
However, now Fleur was at the peak of unhappiness. Hermione, in a drastic change in heart had freaked out and refused to look her in the eye or even talk to her. Hermione, in her bid to keep the Weasleys as her near family friends, had forsaken Fleur. Although hurt and feeling very unloved, Fleur could understand why Hermione was acting this way. Fleur keep her efforts at trying to regain Hermione's attention and love. She even ended up getting an apartment in Diagon Alley, as Hermione worked in Flourish and Blotts bookstore for reasons of obvious interest. Fleur herself was working in Gringotts, in the Cross Species Relations Department.
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If you see me walking down the street
Staring at the sky and dragging my two feet
You just pass me by
It still makes me cry
But you could make me whole again
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Hermione knew that Fleur was trying to talk to her, in fact she would see Fleur everyday, especially during lunch time as Fleur knew that Hermione loved to eat at the little bistro next to Florean Fortesue's Ice Cream Parlour. Fleur often went there, did not actually try to make contact with Hermione, but ALWAYS made sure she sat at the table opposite, so that she could send glances to Hermione. Hermione disliked this, but did not make a fuss as Fleur was not directly annoying or interfering with her.
Today, Fleur was strolling down Diagon Alley, trying to will away thoughts of Hermione. She hadn't emerged from the store to eat lunch just yet. She glanced at the happy couples around her. Funny, when she was with Bill, or even before she met him, she never took notice of other people like this. Now, that her heart was broken and demanding to be healed, that she noticed such things that would cause more yearning and pain. She hated it, she wished she had met Hermione before and avoided all this hurt and confusion. She stifled a sob and growled at her reflection in the window of Eeylops' Owl Emporium, heartily scaring the resident owl.
'You are pathetic. You are part Veela and can't even make the one you want love you,' she stated to her reflection.
The deep sense of loss ate at her everyday. She saw a familiar hair style in the window and turned to watched Hermione pass by the store and herself. She tried to make eye contact but to no avail. Hermione did not even make the slightest move to acknowledge Fleur. Fleur was feeling the utter desperation to just fling herself at Hermione and beg to be hugged, kissed and ravaged. Anything to remove this dark, empty hole in her heart. Fleur felt a tear fall down her cheek. She brushed it away brusquely and decided not to have lunch, deciding instead to call in sick and go home. It was just too much for her today, especially since it was that time of the month.
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And if you see me with another man
Laughing and joking, doing what I can
I won't put you down
Cause I want you around
you can make me whole again
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Hermione, trying very hard to ignore Fleur would normally realise that she was there regardless. It was quite impossible to ignore the shining beauty of the silver blonde, stunning part Veela. She appreciated the fact that Fleur never tried to engage with her, rather to admire from afar. Though this did little to calm her nerves. Hermione, knowing that Fleur would be there at her favourite lunch place, would continue to go anyway, determined not to be deterred. However, because she could never really ignore Fleur, she duly noticed Fleur's absence in the bistro. Hermione allowed herself a quick glance, but then remembered that she was not supposed to be caring, so continued her day without another thought about it.
It had been 2 weeks since that day and ever since Fleur had been trying all sorts of methods to forget about Hermione and try to get on with her life. Various methods included drinking herself to sleep, staying up late watching horror movies, sending endless amounts of letters to Gabrielle and the latest being dating. Fleur snagged a date with a friend of a co-worker. Both deciding to just have fun and see where it took them. After their first date, they both admitted that they weren't really interested in finding someone. Fleur was vaguely amused to know that Brendan was in a similar situation. They decided however to remain friends, one thing that Fleur was finally able to say that she was happy for since moving to Diagon Alley.
Fleur and Brendan made a date to go out for ice-cream and catch up on each other's lives, or rather, love lives.
Tackling his enormous banana split, Brendan began their conversation, 'I shouldn't have ordered the upgrade size.'
'Oui, well, you tend to think more with eyes larger than your stomach lately. Is Michelle really being so unreasonable?' asked Fleur.
Brendan stared at his dessert glumly, ' Yeah. She changed the locks of our apartment and well, I've had to bunk at Mel's.'
Fleur snorted into her chocolate sundae topped with chopped brazil nuts, ' No wonder she was complaining about lack of sleep yesterday! You've been unloading on to Mel again haven't you? I told you! I am willing to talk to you even at midnight if you really need!'
'What, so you can distract yourself from a certain brunette who as far as I can tell, still has a tight grip on your bleeding heart,' muttered Brendan.
Fleur glared at him and dug into her chocolate sundae with more gusto, occasionally flicking nuts at him. He sighed, 'I'm sorry. That was low of me.'
Fleur shifted her feet under the table, 'Je suis desolee. I should apologise too. We're both a sorry sight aren't we? This sugar is not helping. Let's just go out and enjoy the atmosphere, what do you say?'
'Alright. Come on, I want to show you the latest fashion at Madam Malkins,' he exclaimed.
Fleur laughed, 'And you wonder why some people think you're gay!'
He retorted with a light punch but joined her laughter.
Hermione finally emerged from Flourish and Blotts, glad to get away from all the screaming children. School was starting again and well, the Professors of Hogwarts had added a few extra textbooks to the list. She sighed, getting the cricks out of her neck from looking upwards for extra stock. She froze as she saw Fleur pass by on the other side of the road with a rather good looking, brown haired male. They were both laughing. Fleur, in fact was laughing so hard that he had to prevent her from falling down. Hermione felt a sudden rush of familiar and unwelcome emotions batter against her barriers.
In a very desperate bid to escape the scene, she ended up running past the pair, roughly bumping against Fleur, almost on purpose. Fleur froze in shock and grabbed a hold of Hermione's sleeve. Hermione came to a halt, turned a quick moment to glance at Fleur and then at Brendan, felt her eyes well up and rushed off again. Fleur grasped at the air, calling after her.
'No...' was all that made its way out of Fleur's open mouth.
'Bitch!' swore Brendan, grasping Fleur's hand.
Fleur grabbed his face tightly, 'Don't. Don't ever call her that. I... I'm sorry. Brendan, let's call it a day, okay? I need to get home.'
'Fleur! Come on! She clearly is hurting and has been hurting you from day one! She doesn't deserve you and you ought to find some love and happiness!' exclaimed Brendan with disbelief.
Fleur turned away from him, letting go of his face, 'Just stop. I... I can't blame her. I shouldn't have tempted her and myself. This is my fault.'
'NO! You stop right there! It's not your fault at all! If anyone's at all, it belongs to the BOTH of you. She reciprocated; she has to take responsibility for her actions too! Okay, right. I'm taking you home now, but don't you ever think that it's only your fault, ever, okay?' demanded Brendan.
Fleur was taken aback; she offered a weak smile, 'Oui. Okay. Thank you, Brendan.'
He gruffly took her for a hug, 'Yeah, okay. I just don't like my friends getting all depressed and stuff, you know.'
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Looking back on when we first met
Can't escape and I cannot forget
Baby you're the one
You still turn me on
You can make me whole again
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Rounding the corner, Hermione's tears fell free. She couldn't quite believe it though she couldn't understand why she cared so much that Fleur was happy and with another man. She felt hurt, betrayed and deceived, but wasn't she the one doing all the hurt and betrayal? She who joyfully kissed and caressed Fleur on her wedding day, only to turn face and abandon the part Veela soon after because of a change in heart. Hermione felt sick, she fell to her knees and vomited, gagging violently. She felt utterly disgusted by her actions, past and present. Passers by either pretended to not notice her or they tutted under their breath. Hermione was grateful for her hair to mask her face, lest she bring an unwanted publicity to those connected to her.
Hermione apparated in the bathroom of Florean Fortescue's. She glanced at her appearance in the mirror. She gagged again, but suppressed the reflex and rinsed out her mouth. She didn't have the right to feel sick. She didn't have the right to feel hurt by Fleur trying to move on. She should be glad. Hermione cried, remembering first back in Hogwarts when she had shared a long gaze with Fleur. At the time, neither understood the significance. Really, if they had spent more time in each other's presence they would have realised a strong attraction both mind and body.
Then again, Hermione was too young and Fleur was too busy with the TriWizard Tournament. Fleur had often kept an unconscious eye out for Hermione, but since the Beauxbatons were seated with the Ravenclaws, she hardly saw or even glimpsed Hermione. Then she met Bill, became intrigued by his outlandish appearance and wonderfully genial nature. Understandably, hormones and a reasonable dating age turned into an engagement.
Hermione herself had always thought about Fleur, though her constant sniggers with Ginny merely disillusioned her to believe it was out of spite and dislike for the older woman. She had not fully realised her feelings for Fleur until the announcement of Fleur and Bill's engagement. Fleur, temporarily staying with Bill at the Weasley home had met with Hermione again since 2 years later and she had her breath taken away. Over that summer, Hermione had blossomed into her physical maturity to match her premature mental maturity. At that point, Fleur made it her mission to stay away from Hermione, occasionally leaving a carelessly scathing comment if she was forced to remain in the younger woman's presence. Ginny used this as fuel to ridicule Fleur behind her back. Hermione continued but half heartedly.
Hermione cleaned herself up and dutifully finished her shift at Flourish and Blotts, extremely sorry for not thinking to eat lunch before returning. Her hunger ache however, distracted her enough from her heartache and for that, she was grateful.
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Time is laying heavy on my heart
Seems I've got too much of it since we've been apart
My friends make me smile if only for a short while
But you can make me whole again
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Hermione went to visit Harry, who was currently sharing an apartment with Ron while they studied further to become Aurors. Ron, in his amazing luck, was actually quite adept at the occupation. Harry had laughed and mentioned the fact that whenever his life depended on it, Ron blasted perfect spells and had the most agile of reflexes.
'So? How have you been?' asked Harry, pouring lemonade into three glasses.
Hermione leaned on the counter and sighed, 'Well, I saw Fleur with some guy yesterday.'
Harry glanced at her sharply and shared a look with Ron. 'Don't, look. I know I keep saying that I don't want to be in a relationship with her anymore, but maybe, just maybe I was scared. Okay, I AM scared, but how can I just turn around and say, "Hey, I actually do love you and well, my oh my, your heart is in shreds! Did I do that?" For all I know she really HAS gotten over me!' Hermione stammered shrilly.
'Maybe you should go talk to her,' stated Ron.
Hermione and Harry looked at him in total disbelief. 'What? I had to say SOMETHING smart for once, hadn't I?' asked Ron with mock annoyance.
Hermione giggled, brushing tears of laughter from her eyes, 'Oh Ron. I do believe your childhood stupidity has left you for good.'
'Oh, I don't know about for good, but this is definitely a start,' agreed Harry, earning a punch on the shoulder from Ron.
Hermione sighed in the little relief that Harry and Ron's antics gave her. She stayed the night, not wanting to be alone. They slept on the floor together, sleeping bags, popcorn and all. Harry petted Hermione's head gently as he noticed that she had drifted off. Ron's expression was of pure pity to his best female friend. He shook his head, knowing that she wouldn't want such pity and joined Harry in a pained expression as Hermione murmured, 'Fleur...'
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For now I have to wait
But baby if you change your mind
Don't be too late, cause I just can't go on
It's already been too long
But you could make me whole again
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Hermione left Harry and Ron's apartment late in the afternoon. She bid them farewell and promised to eat something once she got home. A thought flickered into her head, perhaps Ron really was giving her good advice. She mentally thanked him and made her way to Fleur's apartment, which in fact she knew very well where it was.
At the exact same moment, Fleur had gone to Hermione's own small studio apartment that she was renting, believing it better than leeching from her parents. It was located near the beginning of Diagon Alley, but a shop away from the Leaky Cauldron. Fleur rang the door bell, hammered on the gate and yelled out Hermione's name repeatedly until a neighbour stuck her head out of a window and demanded that Fleur leave the premises. Fleur glared with malice at the neighbour but did quieten down. She had decided that she would give it straight to Hermione, either she accept her or she really would leave her forever. Fleur had discussed this lengthily with Gabrielle and their grandmother. If Hermione really didn't care about her after announcing to leave for France and never come back, then she really would cut all ties that connected her to Hermione.
Hermione let out a cry of disbelief when she found that Fleur wasn't home. She felt truly in shock and annoyance. The one time she really did want to speak to Fleur and she wasn't available. Hermione realised that she was being childish, but she couldn't help feel spited by the world. She even retaliated strongly at a young man accidentally bumping into her by hexing him to fly over many roofs and land in the garbage bin of Florean Fortescue's.
With a heavy heart and one last single tear dropping from her clear, sapphire eyes, Fleur disapparated.
Only to reappear at her front door, shocked to see Hermione there. Both stood dumbfounded and remained silent for 5 painful minutes. Neither knew how to begin. Fleur stumbled forward and Hermione took her into her arms and they, for what seemed like an eternity joined lips in a painfully forgotten embrace. It appeared as if they were sucking the life out from one another, determined to regain any feeling of joy they could, desperate to feel as they once did.
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Looking back on when we first met,
I can not escape and I can not forget,
Baby, you are the one
You still turn me on,
You can make me whole again.
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There they lay, temporarily spent, satiated enough to just relish the feeling of their bodies fitting together so perfectly. With a very content but guilty sigh, Hermione ran her hand over Fleur's breasts and then caressed her face, 'I'm sorry. I was stupid and I will never ever let you go. I will never ever disappoint you again, that is, if you'll take me back.'
'Of course I'll take you back! I've always wanted you back mon amour! I have missed you so much,' gushed Fleur, a renewed interest in kissing Hermione's cheeks and neck.
'I've missed you Fleur,' murmured Hermione, gently squeezing Fleur's waist, rubbing her face against Fleur's side.
Fleur knew that she no longer had to cry, that she no longer had to worry and just at that moment in time, she was the happiest woman on earth, because Hermione was all that mattered.
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