WARNING!!! This fic contains semi-kinda-sorta-not-really explicit yuri!! This means a gril and another girl liking eachother in a romantic way! The semi-kinda-sorta-not-really explicit scenes are not really vital to the plot and are just there for perverts' enjoyment. You can not read the yuri scenes and understand the not-quite-there plot. This is my last warning!!

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Okay, I lied!! This is my last warning!!

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Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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Kakashi watched in mild intrest as Naruto practiced his jutsus. The boy was improving fast, Kakashi had to give him that. He was growing by leaps and bounds every day. Much to the chargin of Sasuke, of course. But seeing as Kakashi was in a particularly generous mood that evening (owing largely to the recent aquirement of the latest Icha Icha Paradise) he decided that a small reward was in order for the extra work. He should offer to take the orange-clad boy out for some ramen tonight.

"Oi! Naruto!" He called, momentarily distracting the blonde boy from his training. "You've been improving a lot lately."

Naruto grinned broadly and rubbed the back of his head in a mix of delight and embaressment at the uexpected praise. "Yeah, it's probably beacuse that dumb frog-sennin stopped writing those stupid perverted books of his and actually started to train with me!"

Kakashi paused. Perverted books? Maybe it was worth a check. He may always be a loyal Icha Icha Paradise fan, but it didn't hurt to see what else was out there.

"What are they called?" He asked. Naruto gave him an odd look.

"You should know Kakashi-sensei. They are those stupid books that you're always reading."

Kakashi froze. Wha. . . What? His most favorite book series in the entire world, not being continued?! NOO! That couldn't be true! That was like. . . like. . . Naruto never being able to eat ramen again! Like Iruka not yelling at him when he pinched his butt in public! Impossible! Inconcievable! Naruto must surely be mistaken. Surely. . .

Clearing his throat once or twice to cover his shock, he addressed Naruto again, although in a somewhat shakier voice than before.

"Are. . . are you absolutely sure?" He asked urgently. Another odd look.

"Yeah. . . he said something about not being inspired anymore and then just started teaching me all these really neat jutsus!" Naruto started hesitantly, as though unsure as to why it might be important, but by the end of his sentence he had alreadly gained back his almost unnatural enthusiasum for anything related to bringing him a step closer to beating Sasuke. "It was so awesome! The first one was all about. . ."

Kakashi nodded dumbly as his student prattled on and on about his training, to wrapped up in his own little world of pain and loss to really care what Naruto had to say anymore. He would never be able to die happy now. How could he when the best series in the world wouldn't be finished because some old ninja couldn't get horny enough to write anything?! This would not do. . .

A large, manic, almost insane grin spread across Kakashi's masked face as a plan wormed its way into the copy-cat's perverted mind. Yeeeeesssss. . . This would do nicely. . .

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Jiraiya sighed as he surveyed the last of the bathing beauties leave the bath house. No matter how much he peeked or how beautiful the girls were he just couldn't get inspired lately. Oh, he still enjoyed it. He enjoyed very much. Jiraiya Jr. especially. But the old fire and excitement he had felt before was gone. There was no thrill of seeing what he had never seen before. No tingling fear in the back of his mind of getting caught. Without that, peeking was no more than an old habit.

Deciding to just keep looking for more of a lack of something more constructive to do, rather than the hope of finding something that could motivate him to continue his literary works, Jiraiya put his eye back to his spy-glass and searched for another speciman of lovely female flesh. A small frown crossed his features as his perverted gaze swept the empty bathing area. It passed quickly, however, because no sooner had he considered leaving for the day, had a bouncy blonde bombshell of woman sauntered into the steamy room.

An appreciative smile replaced his previous scowl as he watched the curvy girl undo her towel, taking a few cursory glances around the deserted room with impossibly blue eyes and humming quietly to herself. As the fluffy white fabric dropped to the ground, Jiraiya's eye widened slightly against the spy glass and a small trickle of drool formed at the edges of his mouth. She had wide hips, complimented nicely by a thin, but not overly skinny, waist. Large, perfectly pert breasts jiggled slightly with her every movement, smooth, tanned flesh giving way to rosy nipples.

Still humming softly, she reached up with perfectly manicured nails to undo the pink hair-ties that bound her flowing golden locks into two pony-tails, one on each side of her head. As her hair come undone, long platinum tresses reaching down to a plump round behind, Jiraiya thought of many a thing that required an age restriction to be legal. Not bothering to tie up her hair again, the blonde beauty dipped a toe into the steaming bath and, finding that the water was a satisfatory temperature, proceded to lower herself into the enveloping heat with a contented moan.

A moan which (generally unable to be heard from this distance by a common man, but easily audible to a trained shinobi) made Jiraiya Jr. sit up and take notice.

The white-haired peeping-tom watched avidly for the next five or so minutes before boredom began to set in. While she was a very generously gifted woman, one's attention could only be held for so long by a mere soaking. Another gloomy mood began to take hold of Jiraiya as he watched the blonde do nothing more than sit motionlessly in the warm water, her hair spread out on top of the water like a halo.

But lucky for Jiraiya, his prayers were answered for a second time that day as another helping of young female flesh entered the bathing area. The slowly drying puddle of drool on the ground was flooded anew as the sennin took in the lovely lady's visage.

Where as the other woman's countenance had been towheaded and deeply tanned, this new one's was pale as the moon and complimented by her pitch black hair and dark, half-closed eyes. As the skimpy towel dropped away from her chest, she was revealed to be slightly more endowed than the blonde, but a bit more on the slim side. Stooping down to gather something discarded with her towel, Jiraiya was presented with a most pleasing rear veiw. Straightening up (much to Jiraiya Jr.'s dismay) she expertly tied her hair into two small buns.

Then, without so much as a glance in the direction of her temporary bathing partner, the dark-haired woman slipped into the water soundlessly, barely even making a ripple. But, before Jiraiya had even managed to properly aquaint himself with the new woman's curves, something else drew his attention.

The blonde seemed to have noticed the newcomer inturrupting her afternoon bath and slit her baby-blue eyes open to take a look. Her eyes opened all the way and she cast her approving gaze up and down the pale girl's body, pausing only when she dragged her eyes from the anatomy currently submerged beneath the steamy surface of the water, and up to the brunette's face. She stared, totally unashamed at being caught checking out another girl, directly into murky, half-lidded eyes. A small twitch of the brunette's lips gave away the obvious pride she had in her body and winked slyly before she turned her head away and resumed her dozing.

A mischievious grin twisted the blonde's face as she surveyed the body beside her again. She sunk ever so slightly lower into the water, only the occasional swell of the otherwise stagnant fluid betraying her actions. Barely distinguishable underneath the murky water, was the distorted shape of the brunette's body being cautiously approched by the other's dainty foot.

Endless obsidian pools snapped open as a foot caressed her inner thigh gently. Almost immeadiately her dark eyes focused on the smirking blonde, whose expression quickly changed to that of a coy smile. Matching the flirtatous look, the brunette tenderly removed the foot from her leg and slid silently underwater, the smug look never leaving her face.

The blonde waited with baited breath, glancing nervously from side to side as the steam in the bath house thickened to an almost impenatrable cloud, the cover of the water now almost as good as hiding behind a closed door. Abruptly, she gasped and threw back her head, hands diving under the water with a splash. Scantly visible under the water were the spread legs of the blonde woman, and in between them was a vague shape with flowing dark hair in which the blonde's hands had entangled themselves.

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Meanwhile, Jiraiya and Jiraiya Jr. were in paradise. Here, right in his own village of the Konoha, were two beautiful young ladies engaging in activities of a sexual nature before his very eyes! Oh how the gods must favor him this day! He never saw anything this good around here. Konoha women were far too uptight and isolated from the rest of the world. You would be able to consider yourself lucky if you ever saw even so much as a mini-skirt within these walls! He woul probably be able to write for weeks on end after this!

Giggling insanely to himself, Jiraiya pressed his eye closer to the spy-glass and peered through the thick steam.

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The petite blonde whimpered pitifully, as though her favorite toy had just been taken away. Her whining was abruptly cut short, however, when a massive up-surge of water fell away to reveal a slightly out of breath, but very smug, brunette. Without giving her light-haired partner a chance to voice her surprise, the brunette leaned forward sharply and captured tempting full, pink lips with her own.

Responding urgently to the kiss, the blonde wraped her arms wontonly around her partner's neck and pulled her forward insistently. The brunette shifted a little and moved forward so that she was sitting on her partner's lap, so close in thier kiss that thier breasts were pressing against eachother.

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The once-small puddle of drool on the ground had now grown to a small lake and was threatening to start it's own ocean.

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The brunette shifted again, aranging herself so that she was sitting on just one of the blonde's legs. When the sudden change in position moved the brunette away from the blonde, the light-haired girl whimpered pathetically and jerked her dark-haired counterpart closer. The sudden friction between her legs caused the brunette to arch back abruptly, moaning her pleasure to the world. The blonde too this oppportunity to attack the pale column of flesh that had so recently been exposed to her hungry mouth.

The brunette groaned appreciatively and took it upon herself to begin a fast, needy rhythm of rocking and moaning. Licking her way mercilessly along the beautiful throat before her, the blonde's small, delicate hands blazed a continuous path down the brunette's body, only to come to a stop when her carefully manicured nails reached her lover's voluptuous breast. Taking the rosy globe of flesh in her hand, she began to kneed and massage the pliant flesh, much to the delight of the brunette.

The blonde suddenly stopped her pleasing ministrations (drawing another pitious whimper from her partner in response) and instead looked up at dark obsidian eyes, half closed with lust. Bringing her slightly wrinkled hands upwards as though in a trance, the blonde cupped the bruntte's face gently and brought her down for a soul-searing kiss. The brunette hummed into the kiss in appreciation and closed her eyes languidly.

They jerked apart with a splash of water, eyes wide and cheeks flaming. The soft taccato of bare feet on a stone floor echoed hollowly as the sound bounced off the water, reflected and magnified five fold. Eyes flickering back and forth from her blonde haired partner-in-crime and the doorway from which the steadily cresendoing sounds of footsteps emanated, the brunette pulled herself out of the water hurriedly. Grabbing her towel and fixing her hair as best she could, the ebony haired girl paused mid-motion as she caught sight of the doe-eyed girl still submerged in water.

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Jiraiya sighed, despondantly. Such a pity. Here he was getting all excited and inspired over a simple fling in the bathhouse. He had seen too many of those. He needed something different, something better. Maybe if one of the inumerable couples he had seen had decided to meet again. A nooner in the bathhouse was entertaining, most certainly, but he needed something with a bit more than that.

Forbidden passions in semi-public were all well and good, but forbidden affairs in semi-public were much better. They not only encorperated the element of being caught having wild-sex in public, but a long standing devotion that inspired the lovers to go through the dangers again and again for the sake of love, a quality Jiraiya had found to be lacking in many an otherwise good book.

Yes, he always had been a sap for romance. Do you have a problem with that?

He turned sadly back to his spy-glass. Maybe he could catch a glimpse of them as they left. . .

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Biting her lip in anxiety, the brunette half-ran over to the edge of the bath, heedless of the slippery stone. Bending down haphazardly, she whispered a quick sentence that, even in all its plainess, sent shivers through both the vouyer watching from a far and the girl so close she could feel the brunette's breath tickle her ear.

As the dark-haired girl wrapped her towel around her chest and scurried out of the bathhouse (just barely missing a collision with group that had been entering), a huge, beaming smile lit up the blonde's face as she mouthed the words that had been spoken to her moments before.

"I'll be waiting for you."

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Hatake Kakashi grinned madly behind his mask and rubbed his hands together in a display of childish glee, giggling in a rather high-pithced voice that was oddly disturbing coming from a grown man. Peering back through the bushes, he glanced over at the white haired pervert who was, at the moment, writing feverishly and only pausing to stop drool from ruining the ink. Giggling like a school-girl once again, Kakashi wrapped his arms around himself in joy.

. . . Which caused him to fall flat on his back. Not that he noticed, though, being so wrapped up in his own little world of ecstatic jubilation.

Before Kakashi could have either a happiness induced seizure or a spontaneous orgasm, his attention was drawn from his delirium and to the two figures who had just appeared in a puff of smoke. From his prone position on the ground he waved a small hello and grinned maniaclly.

Sasuke let out a sigh, barely audible over Naruto's manic snickering. After allowing the questionably sane pair continue for a minute or so, Sasuke quickly became fed up with the gratingly high-pitched giggles and promptly whacked Naruto in the head with and open palm and kicked Kakashi in the ribs in one simultaneous motion, effectively silencing them both.

As Naruto glared daggers at Sasuke and rubbed his poor abused head, Kakashi managed to gain control of himself and get to his feet. Casually straightening his uniform, Kakashi spoke in a brisk, business-like manner, although a slight tremor of uncontainable happiness ran through it.

"Sorry about that." He said, dusting off his pants. "Now, then. I expect you'll be wanting your payment." He looked up and met Sasuke's eyes. Taking a quick glance over him and Naruto, he raised and eyebrow in silent question at thier marginal breathlessness and disheveled clothing. After a few minutes it seemed that Sasuke would not be answering Kakashi's unspoken query anytime soon and he took it upon himslef to initiate the conversation.

"As I recall," He said in a carefully controlled tone. "The little show you put on was finished about. . ." Kakashi glanced at his watch. "Thirty-nine minutes and seventeen seconds ago. What kept you?"

Sasuke shifted his wieght in a way that could almost be called akward. "We were. . .detained." He said, only the smallest pause fracturing his sentnce.

Naruto snickered quietly behind Sasuke's back and muttered under his breath. "And what a kinky little detainment it was."

Sasuke shot him a sharp look as Kakashi's smile grew behind his mask. Drawing his smoldering gaze back to the copy cat in front of him, Sasuke held out his hand expectantly. The large grin quickly turned into a rueful sigh of mock sorrow and he dug into one of his many pockets, searching intently for something in the deep recesses of his pants. After a great amount of cermony and parting words with his money, Kakashi handed over the wad of bills, which Sasuke shoved into his pants, a satisfied smirk gracing his pale lips.

"Pleasure doing business with you." Sasuke said sarcastically, giving an exaggerated bow to his sensei. Kakashi waved him away, impatiently.

"Anything for my Icha Icha Paradise." He said distractidly as he resumed his former position of watching the sennin scrawl furiously on his parchment.

Naruto rolled his eyes, a muttered comment about perverts and thier weird hangups barely audible. Sasuke snorted derisively as he grabbed the collar of Naruto's jacket and dragged him away from thier teacher who was, at current, lost in his own perverted world. Twisting a little bit in the other boy's grip so that he could face him, Naruto looked up at him expectantly.

"So where are we off to in such a rush?" He asked rather peevishly. Sasuke snorted again.

"Where do you think, dobe? We haven't finished 'experimenting' with you jutsu, yet."

Sasuke was suddenly swept off his feet as a bouncing bundle of blonde energy grabbed his hand and pulled him into the nearest convenient piece of shrubbery.

The screams of two lovers commiting indecent acts in public went unheard by the two perverts who were too busy fantasizing about the upcoming Icha Icha Paradise to notice.

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YESYESYESYES!! I finished it! I've had this half-done before I even started Keeping Secrets. I'm pretty glad that I got it done. Please review the starving author?!!!