Truman's Ho

by Colonel Cooper

A re-imagining of the scene in episode 02:17 where Coop relieves a drunken Harry of his gun, after the death of his beloved Josie. The first two lines are taken from the episode's script.

"There's a whole lot I don't understand."

"We're all like that, Harry."

"Coop, it's just that…when I picture my beautiful Josie on a knob..."

"I think I see where this is heading."

"…I'm not seeing furniture at the fucking Great Northern!"

"Ditto, Harry. Not that I've pictured her on mine, though."

"Why not? She was so beautiful."

"Agreed – but I love Audrey. I don't need erotic thoughts about other women."

"But I have erotic thoughts about Audrey, too. You know, impaling her on my nightstick – nailing her tight little…"

"That's too much fucking information, Harry – just pull the damn trigger!"