Immaculate Savior
Chapter 1
Drizzt wrote his name in the snow as he urinated. Golden threads arced through the searing cold to cleave the pristine whiteness. Even in this frigid wasteland spirit endures, he thought to himself. His name was written but he found he still had so very much to say. Loves, he quickly improvised, a wry smile haunting his terse expression. And then...
His uncertainty steamed crudely, mockingly, beneath the elegantly woven words. His eyes widened as he desperately searched his heart. No! He watched with horror as the gilded stream tore the snow to midwife a gaping maw that threatened to devour his soul. I am truly lost. The last few drops of urine tapped his boots like a leper seeking alms.
Cattie-brie, her belly swollen with child, watched all this while standing beside him. She shrugged and pulled deeply from the bottle of spirits she had taken with her on their flight from Mithral Hall.
"Story o' yer life, elf. Might put that away less ye've figured out another use for it."
He bowed his head in shame and sullenly replied, "I wish you would'nt drink. All you do is make fun of me when you drink."
"All you do is make fun of me when you drink," she parroted, screwing her face into a grotesque caricature of his own. "Oh hush, ye sorry sod!"
She started to take another drink then doubled over with a moan. She's been doing that alot lately, Drizzt thought.
Night had fallen before they arrived at the hamlet of Bethel. There was but one inn in the town with one door with but one doorhandle so they knew what they had to do. Drizzt grasped the doorhandle with his hand, curling his fingers around its handle. Okay. I can do this, he thought. He got into the proper stance and took a couple quick breaths to center himself. He pulled on the doorhandle, opening the door.
The innkeeper narrowed his eyes as Drizzt and Cattie approached him.
"Yer 'et draw 'et liz wit 'em dwars," he said.
And so it begins, the drow thought to himself. Why must I be the one to fight teh prejudice?
"They are just like anyone else," Drizzt said evenly.
"Izzat so? Alla 'em dwars, men...livin tageder yar affa yar 'an notter womaner en sahht! Wazzat 'bout ah asker?"
"Aint natural!" someone hollered through a mouthfull of missing teeth.
"I want a room," Drizzt said.
"Alla rumes a tayken! Yer ken sleeba barn 'doe!"
Cattie-Brie laid on the hay in the barn and moaned more and more. Drizzt found an old horse blanket made of rough cloth. He laid it on her to blanket her and hoped it did'nt scratcher. Don't worry Cattie-Brie, I won't leave you. He slipped into reverie.
Drizzt had worked hard to gain the other dwarves' trust, by word and by deed. He remembered with pride the expressions on their faces when he had walked into the mines with his shiny new workboots and said, "This be a fine mine, laddies."
Someone had thrown Dagnar's axe at him that day but the dwarves came to bear a grudging respect for him.
"The bandit swung his falchion at the back of my head. I could not parry the blow as I was otherwise engaged with the barbarian and the giant frogman. A drow would have been decapitated. But I was no ordinary drow so I quickly placed my right foot behind my left heel at an oblique angle and bent my left knee so that I could-"
"why dont'cha skips tha borin' parts soz we can hears all 'bouts tha borin' parts," Dagnar said.
The other dwarves laughed at this. Drizzt found their merriment infectious which made the dwarves laugh even harder.
"'saws cattie th'other day. th'philly looks t'be cookin sunthin in 'er oven," one of the dwarves said.
"now there be a tale worth hearin!" another said.
"And a fine tale it is," Drizzt said.
As one the dwarves leaned forward, ready to hang on every word.
Drizzt's scimitars flew from their scabbards like lighting. He began his whirling dance as he talked, his scimitars twirling and making whirling sounds.
"She came at me with her sword! I was rocked against the wall by the force of her blow! If I were anything less than more than an ordinary drow she would have finished me off right there! I scissored my scimitars together and locked them around her sword! She desperately thrust her sword in and out to try and penetrate my defenses! She grew frustrated and withdrew her blade from between mine! I used my levitation to jump up and stand upside down from the cieling! She was too clever for that trick and met me blow for blow! I saw an opening and I took it! I kicked her in the face and she was knocked to the ground, panting and moaning! I held my scimitar to her throat and told her to yield!"
Drizzt was satisfied to see the dwarves' bearded mouths hanging open in awe.
"'at aint shaggin!" one of them said.
"Nay," Drizzt said, sheathing his scimitars with a snap, "tis making love."
Cattie-Brie moaned more and more. What is wrong with her, Drizzt thought.
"Cattie, maybe we should find a priest...or some healing magic."
"I'll show ye some magic ye useless fool!"
She tore aside the blanket. Drizzt backed against the wall, his eyes widening in horror.
"Cattie! What is...oh...oh my god...oh...oh...oh sweet Jesus, help me!"