A/N: This is for Carma. Wonderful, fantastic Carma, the girl who changes people's lives and inspires us all. There's really nothing else to say about this girl that everyone hasn't already said, because she's simply amazing. :) I love you, Carma. *hugs*
Summer
This is our summer.
It's a summer romance.
That's all it is, and you know it from the start.
It's no obligations, no worries, no strings attached.
You're free to be yourself, and to ignore any other concerns that come creeping in.
It's summer.
The first time you see her, she's laughing.
Her hair cascades down her back in gentle brown waves as she throws her head back.
The look of pure joy on her face is so genuine that for a second, you feel like you can't breathe.
Sunlight falls on her, illuminating her smile even brighter than it already is.
And in that moment, you're swept away.
You make your way towards her, self-consciously running a hand through your hair.
You shove your hands into your pockets as you draw closer, swallowing and willing yourself to assume your usual confident manner.
Her laughter subsides as she notices your attention, tipping her head to look at you with a critical eye.
The girl she's talking to lifts her eyebrows at you, as if to ask what your intentions are.
Intentions?
A summer. That's all.
A summer filled with fun and laughter and perhaps a touch of romance.
A summer that will eventually fade into pleasant memories of a time when you were carefree and the world was a song.
A summer that will come to an end.
A summer that has no consequences.
A summer in another world.
"Hey," you say by way of greeting, jerking your chin upward in a kind of "'sup?" nod as you speak. "Chad Dylan Cooper."
Her warm brown eyes meet yours, and you can feel a little shiver of anticipation run through you.
After a moment of held eye contact, the smile spreads across her face once more.
"Hey," she returns more softly. "I'm Sonny."
And so it begins.
You smile wistfully as you recall that day.
The way she laughed at your jokes, even when you knew they weren't funny.
The way she tucked her hair behind her ear, letting the end of it curl into her face when she looked down.
The way you sat on the beach with her, how the two of you talked about so much and yet so little.
The way you lay awake that night, looking up at the stars and thinking about how she didn't just shine - she glowed.
That night, you vowed to yourself that this summer would be one that you would never forget.
"Chad?" You love how she says your name, like she's always happy to think of you.
"Yeah?" you reply noncommittally, clearing your throat.
"I've been thinking..." Never a good sign, you can't help but think, before you return to your senses and focus on the beautiful girl in front of you.
"About what?"
"About...us." You look up immediately, surprised.
As far as you know, there is no "us."
Not yet, at least.
Only a perfect first day and the swirling dreams you had last night, her melodious laugh echoing in your ears.
"And?" The word comes out somewhat strangled as you attempt to swallow, suddenly nervous.
"I think we should try it," she says, her words confident but her appearance embarrassed, looking down and tucking her hair back.
"I agree," you say simply, and her eyes flick upward to meet yours.
"We don't have very much time," she reminds you, the ten weeks of summer suddenly seeming so few.
You hold your hand out to her, pulling her up from the sand.
You don't let go, even when she's completely steady.
"Well, then. Let's make the most of it."
And make the most of it you do, spending the entire day alone together.
It's what you consider your first date.
When the night comes to an end, you decide that you've never met a girl like this one.
And in your heart, you know that you'll never find another.
But, you remind yourself, she isn't the one.
She's beautiful, she's funny, she can make anything seem interesting, she's full of laughter and light, she makes you feel like you're flying...
But she can't be the one.
Because it's only summer.
It's a beautiful day, with clear skies and the waves breaking just so on the shore.
Some way or another, she convinces you to go swimming with her.
Her definition of swimming is laughing and playing in the waves, which you honestly would prefer over actual swimming in the ocean.
So you meet her on the beach, once you've both changed into your swimsuits, and it's all you can do to not let your jaw drop at the sight of her in a red bikini.
"Come on, Chad!" she calls out with a peal of laughter, reaching out and taking your hand.
The next thing you know, you're running into the waves with her, cold water lapping at your feet and ankles before a huge wave crashes, swallowing the both of you.
"Sonny? Sonny!" You sputter as you pull your head out of the water, your hand no longer holding anything. "Sonny!"
"I'm here, silly!" She's standing right behind you, and you breathe a sigh of relief. "We're not even that far in yet. Let's go a bit - "
Both of you, absorbed in conversation, fail to notice the next monstrous wave as it approaches, and this time, the two of you are caught completely off-guard.
It's a swirl of water and sand and salt and you have absolutely no sense of direction.
The wave fiercely tosses you around for a bit before subsiding, but by this time, you've swallowed multiple gulps of saltwater and your oxygen is limited.
Though you know you ought to panic, your mind doesn't quite process its supposedly natural reaction, and you simply remain where you are.
A hand grasps your hair and pulls you up, your head breaking the surface of the water just as you open your mouth to take in a huge breath.
"Chad!" your savior gasps, clutching a hand to her heart and pressing her other to yours, for reasons unknown. "You scared me, I didn't know where you were!"
You inhale deeply a few times, restoring your normal breathing pattern and shaking your head, trying to at least get some of the water out of your hair.
"I mean, what if you had died? There's no way I could have - "
She continues to ramble on, but for once, you fail to listen to her.
Instead, you take in the sight of her, her hair now dark brown and stringy from the water, all of it entirely a mess on top of her head.
Her eyes are red from the saltwater, and the cold water temperature has left her pale and shivering, some goose bumps appearing.
She has one hand still covering her heart, and you can feel that the other is still pressed against yours.
You've never seen something so beautiful.
" - and maybe we should stop swimming, because I think we've had enough excitement for today, don't you - "
So you reach out to her and place your hands on her waist, tugging her close.
She instantly falls silent, looking up at you through her wet eyelashes.
And you press your lips to hers for the first time.
You cherish every moment.
Carpe diem.
Seize the day.
Don't think about tomorrow.
You've never lived like this, and it's both exciting and frightening.
Spontaneity. Thrills. Anticipation without plans.
You're living freely.
Making the most of every second.
It's exhilarating.
You can feel it coming.
You know that she's going to say it soon.
And everything will change.
Because suddenly, everything will matter.
There will be a future.
And you'll have to question if she's going to be there when it comes.
She leans her head on your shoulder as you watch the waves, interlacing her fingers with yours.
You kiss the top of her head lightly, adjusting to make it more comfortable for both of you.
"Chad?"
She whispers your name, so softly it's like a breath of the wind.
"Yes, sunshine?"
"I love you."
There are no stutters, no awkward pauses.
It's you and her, sitting in the sand.
It's her telling you she loves you.
And it's you not knowing what to say back.
"Oh."
Though it's not what you want to say, it comes out of your mouth.
She lifts her head and looks into your eyes, startled.
"Oh?"
You cringe automatically as her eyes flash at you.
"I mean…"
Do you love her?
Your heart whispers that you do.
But love…it's a promise.
It's saying that you'll be there.
And you don't know if you will be.
But with her looking at you, with those chocolate eyes…
"I love you too."
Summer is fleeting.
Days filled with sunshine and kisses pass.
The weeks slip by as if they're nothing.
And suddenly, there is only one week left.
Seven days left with her.
A lifetime left living without her.
The thought is almost unbearable.
Your days together become fewer and fewer.
Though you try to stay as happy as ever, it's impossible.
You know she thinks about it almost as often.
The glance she sends your way when she thinks you're not looking.
The melancholy half-smile on her face.
The way she hugs you a little tighter.
The weather is threatening to turn cold now.
Instead of sitting on the shore together, you sit by a campfire with a blanket.
You find yourself losing the mindset you've had all summer.
Somehow, it's no longer about every second.
It's about the next second, and how she won't be there.
A tear slips down your cheek.
"Chad?"
She looks up at you just as you begin to blink back tears.
Her breath catches in her throat.
You can see she's been having similar thoughts.
"Oh, Chad."
You hold on to each other.
You won't be able to soon.
But for now, it's all you need.
And just like that, the summer is over.
The last day has come.
It's time to say goodbye.
You finish packing your bags.
You exchange phone numbers with other campers, though you know in your heart that you'll never call them and they'll never call you.
It's just the way it works.
A summer together, that's all it is.
Beautiful memories…
But it's time to return to reality.
You meet her by the waves.
She's there already, her arms wrapped around herself.
Even looking at her just from behind, you can tell that she's crying.
"Sonny."
She turns around, the red dress she's wearing swirling around her in the wind.
Without a word, she rushes into your arms.
She buries her face in your shirt, taking deep breaths to let the tears subside.
You close your eyes, letting everything about this moment seep into your memory.
The subtle smell of salt on the breeze.
The feel of sand between your toes.
The wind blowing your hair.
The girl in your arms.
"It's been a wonderful summer."
She says the words quietly, her voice a murmur.
You nod, unable to speak.
"Do you have my – my phone number?"
You shake your head.
"Do you have mine?" you ask, already knowing the answer.
"No."
And neither of you makes a move to ask for the other's.
Because she knows as well as you do that it was only ever a summer.
You kiss her, the salt of her tears mixing with the salt in the air.
It's a bittersweet kiss.
The last one you'll ever share.
You finally pull away.
You brush her lips against hers, so lightly you almost can't feel it.
"Goodbye."
You turn around and walk away.
You don't look back.
It was a summer romance.
That's all it was, and you knew it from the start.
There were no obligations, no worries, no strings attached.
You were free to be yourself, and to ignore any other concerns that came creeping in.
It was summer.
But that doesn't stop your heart from breaking.
Two months later, you're still thinking about her.
You wish you had done things differently.
You wish you had told her you loved her the moment you met her.
You wish you had told her how much she meant to you.
You wish you had asked for her phone number.
You wish you hadn't said goodbye.
But it's time to move on now.
There's nothing you can do to find her.
So you go into your closet and find the bag you brought with you that summer.
You open it up for the first time since that last day.
The smell of the sea and a flowery perfume waft out.
And on top of all your things is a scrap of paper.
555-0125
Summer can mean forever.
The next second, you're dialing the number with frantic fingers.
You press the phone to your ear, desperate for her to pick up.
It rings once.
Twice.
Thrice.
"Hello?"
It's her.
What should have been a faded memory all comes rushing back.
Who says summer doesn't last?
"Hey."
This is our forever.
A/N: My submission for ZoraChannyTwilight4ever's contest. Song? This Is Our Song. It inspired me to write about the fabled summer romance that we all dream of, but one that simply can't be let go of.
I'm leaving on vacation for a week, so I'll see you all when I get back. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving break, if you live in America! And if not, have a lovely week. ;) See you soon.
Please review. For my sake and dear Carma's :P Share your thoughts?