A/N: Hello again, amigos. Having just finished an NCIS: LA story, and working on something else, I didn't think I'd be posting anything new for a while. I'd forgotten about this small ficlet that I wrote a while back. So, without further ado, here's another Kensi/Callen piece - from Deeks' POV. Should be interesting.
By the way, I don't own NCIS: Los Angeles.
Out of His League
He watches her from across the bullpen, seeing her brown eyes light up as she laughs. She tosses witty banter back and forth with the other members of his team – their team – and he grins and joins in, chatting easily. She flashes him a smile with a twinkle in her eye as they joke together.
He notices the way she leans towards their team leader – how their hands touch, how they communicate whole paragraphs with only their eyes – and he allows himself a moment of bittersweetness. Not that he begrudges them their camaraderie – he could never do that – but he wouldn't be human if he didn't feel a pang of yearning for what would never be his.
He'd be a liar if he said he didn't care for her – perhaps not all the way to love, as it might be if he had a chance to take it further – but definitely as more than a friend. He's always admired her, after all – he respects her outstanding abilities as an operative; he enjoys the way she teases him; he's secure in the fact that she'll always have his back; and he's downright proud of how she can incapacitate guys much bigger than herself. Indeed, she's a partner he's lucky to have.
These…feelings…they're inappropriate for someone he's supposed to love as a sister. And yet he can't help them – and the others have picked up on it. But he refuses to admit it – he knows there's only one man for her, and it's not him.
He knew it the moment he saw both of them together; observed the way they acted around each other. She was taken – he could see that, even if they were still clueless about it.
He chuckles quietly and ruefully to himself. They really need to get on with it – for his sake as well as theirs. He supposes, since they haven't yet, he could try his luck with her and see where it goes – but he already knows how it will end, even if she doesn't. They would enjoy it for a while, and probably it would develop into something quite meaningful, but eventually she would realize that he isn't right for her. So he doesn't bother. Why invite the emotional tax?
Although, he's surprised no one else seems to recognize that they're meant for each other. It's as if he's the only one who knows, who even notices the depth of the connection they share. It might be concealed, but it's there.
Then again, it's quite possible that one else watches her as closely as he does – except for one person, of course.
It's tugging at the edges of his heart, he swears. She's beside him every day, with her radiant smile and shining eyes – and yet he can't touch her. He can't. She's not his to take. She's been marked as someone else's, but she hasn't been claimed yet – and he can't step in to do it.
You're a lucky guy, G. Callen, he thinks to himself, watching the other man touch a lock of her hair and make a passing comment about her shampoo. Now if you would only wake up and see it already.
She turns to him and asks what he's thinking; he's quick to assure her it's nothing. But oh, if only she knew…
He makes a promise to himself that if this carries on much longer, he'll knock some sense into their hard heads (subtly, of course – he doesn't want to get killed) and push them together himself. A guy can only take so much, after all – and they've had more than enough time already. Truth be told, he thinks they'd have gotten together much earlier if it wasn't for the fact that they're both undercover agents with troubled pasts who play Russian roulette with danger on a regular basis.
He shakes his head and sighs – agents and their lies. The game of deception they play can be a real killer on romance and happily ever after's.
If there even are happily ever after's for people like them – but he's an optimistic sort of guy, and he believes in the positive…most of the time.
Eric's whistle signals to them the start of another case, and they all move out, ready to begin. And he notices that, as usual, she's never far from Callen. But she glances at him fondly as they walk up, and he knows she cares for him too – just not in the way he might wish.
Ah, well, he thinks. Them's the breaks. He's not upset – not really. He knows she's Callen's girl – always has been, always will be – but she's also his partner and his friend. So he'll be that to her too – a partner and a friend, and maybe even a brother.
Ray will never get that call, because with the way things stand, Marty Deeks knows he'd rather be Kensi Blye's brother than her lover.