Dicalimer: I do not own, claim to own, or pretend to own the characters involved in this tragic work of fiction. Even if I do want to reach in a fix this situation…
Enjoy, su!
"It's all right...I love you little one."
"I won't let anyone see you."
"No one look…"
"Don't look…"
"I don't want you to see…"
"…my child…"
Did You Know?
Does he know? Does he know how much I truly love him? Kyo, do you honestly think I can't stand the sight of you? I know…I realize I don't look you in the eye, that I always, constantly check your beads. But did you know I'm trying to protect you? I don't want you hurt…for you to feel the pain of the world. To be scorned.
I'm not doing a very good job am I?
Akito, he…he doesn't understand. Yes he's the closest thing to a god the Zodiac has, but he doesn't know what it's like to be the cat. What it's like to be the cat's mother…
I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. You know I love you; I could never hate you. I could never…
*
"It's disgusting."
"This is Kyo's true form?"
"His body's all warped and ugly."
"And what's that smell? He smells terrible."
"Is this…"
"…the cat spirit's…"
"…true form?"
"It's disgusting."
*
Did you know I'm afraid? It's true. I'm afraid of you, of what you turn into, what could happen when you look like that. I'm afraid of what would happen if someone were to remove those beads, those beads made of bone and blood…Would they run from you? Would they stay? Or would they completely reject you? God knows how many times that thought has run trough my mind. Yes, I have thought of it, asking Hatori to erase my memories, but I don't want you to hate me. I don't want…
But you do hate me, don't you?
You hate me because I'm forcing my one-sided love on you. I don't want you to be lonely, but I don't want you to hate me. What can I do? What do you want me to do?
I-I couldn't tell you that I'm afraid, no, I could never do that. Because then you would really start to hate me.
*
"Kyo...what's wrong?"
"Did something happen again?"
"Did Akito say something?"
"It's all right."
"Mommy loves you."
*
You can't see it, can you? How much I love you. I can see it now, as I make sure you're wearing your beads. I watch as you look away, wanting with all your might to flinch away from me, but using all your will to stay still.
To make it through this daily routine.
I want to smile at how stubborn you are, but it makes me sad. How can you not see how your indifference is affecting me? Do you really hate me that much?
You know it's during these times that I'm able to look at you fully. I see you orange tint in your hair, wondering if it'll by the time you're a teenager, and your large red eyes. You'll be handsome enough to rival Yuki when you two are older, do you know that?
I'll let you go out today; you'll want to play with Kagura. She really likes you, doesn't she?
*
"Akito's wrong. You are human, like everyone else."
"You're just under an evil spell for a little while that makes you turn into that."
"As proof, look…"
"You changed right back."
*
It was true when I said that that day. You are under an evil spell for a while; you are human, just like everyone else. One day, you'll find someone who will realize that, who will see your ugliness and embrace it. Who, though afraid, will refuse to leave you. Unlike Kagura. Unlike me…
*
"It's all right."
"I'm not scared a bit."
"You're my son and I'm so proud of you."
"You're so cute, I won't let any one else see you."
*
I'm not scared any more; not one bit. I wish I could keep people from seeing you, seeing you in that form, but I can't. I wish I could have kept you safe, kept them from hurting you like everyone else. Like Kagura; like Akito; like Yuki; like me…
*
"No, I love you."
"If it would help, your mother..."
"...would die for you."
*
Kyo, please be happy, wherever this life will lead you. Don't let my mistakes be the bane of your existence, of your decisions from now on. Just because you were the cat doesn't mean you should suffer, that you should be alone, that you are worthless and a burden to others. I loved you Kyo, loved you like I always told you, though it was always portrayed poorly. Don't listen to Yuki, or Akito, or your father, as I know he will be just as harsh as our family head, but listen to those who love you, who cherish you, who want to be together always. And I'll support you and remain proud of you no matter what, because I love you Kyo.
I love you…
There was a gun shot and a young woman crumpled to the floor, her blood pooling around her still form from the wound in her head. Her blood was red, red like the eyes of the child she had brought into this world, like the eyes of the boy she had tried to raise with all the might she had, like the eyes of the boy she had tried to protect from the harshness of the world. It was red; red like the eyes of an angry cat who felt she had no right to love him.
"Did you know your mother loved you Kyo? No, I guess not."
Fin
As promised, a revamp of the story. Although I know it doesn't look much different from before (after all, the core is still the same), I took the liberty of fixing a few sentences and adding some things to make it flow smoother. Does seem a bit better then the last time you guys read it? Huh? Anyways, I'm redoing chapter two too, so check that out next to see if there's any difference. See you soon!
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