On the way back from a mission Team Hiruzen has a surprise!

Team Hiruzen

Hiruzen Sarutobi watched the sleeping figures of his students. Some time during the long night Orachimaru had rolled over near his white haired team mate Jiraiya who had snuggled close to his team mate for warmth while the only kunoichi Tsunade had wisely slept away from her teammates. The Third Hokage was very content with the outcome of his latest mission and was very proud of how his three students had conducted themselves. In the last six months since he had started life as their sensei they had all showed vast improvement and were on their ways to becoming great ninjas.

As usual Tsunade was the first to wake up. She quickly gathered her things and sluggishly dragged her body towards the nearby stream to take care of her morning hygiene. She briefly looked over at her sensei and nodded her head in greeting.

Shortly afterwards the two boys began to stir. Orachimaru started to stretch and wiggle trying to rouse himself from sleep. His bed that morning was incredibly soft and warm that morning and he did not really feel like getting up. Though there was something hard poking into his back and he tried to move away only to have it more firmly planted along his back.

Jiraiya was still asleep dreaming about his beautiful blonde teammate. She was warm and very soft in his arms as he cuddled closer to her nuzzling her neck. He could not help but to think she smelt faintly of mothballs. Tsunade started to wiggle and squirm in his arms so Jiraiya held her tighter and gave her a firm tap on her behind.

"Tsunade," he muttered in his sleep. "Don't move so much."

Orachimaru hearing the voice of his unwanted teammate right next to his ear and feeling a hand pat his butt bolted strait up, or at least he would have except Jiraiya had him in a tight grip.

"Get off of me you pervert!" Screamed the dark faired ninja as he tried to wrestle out of his teammate's relentless grip.

Startled by Orachimaru's scream Jiraiya eyes flew open and all he could see was the pail ninja he had wrapped in his arms. The blonde kunoichi he had just been dreaming of was no where's to bee seen.

"Where's Tsunade?" Jiraiya asked barely awake.

Orachimaru's face went from its usual white to red and then a horrible puce. The genin face contorted with rage as Jiraiya continued to hold him in his arms.

"Get off of me!" Orachimaru said enunciating each word with a deep growl.

Jiraiya finally understanding the position he was in quickly jumped back and tried to scoot as far back as he could get from his dark haired team mate. Jiraiya could feel his face heat up with a deep scarlet blush.

As the two boys were having a stare off the third member of their team came back into the clearing where they had set up camp. She was pale and shaking as she quietly walked to where here fellow ninjas were. She walked up to their sensei and whispered something in his ears while trying to hide a pair of pants from the two boys view.

The pair were having a heated discussion. Tsunade's face was bright red while Hiruzen's face became paler.

"It's the first time," The two boys heard the girl cry out. "How could I know that I would start now?"

Tsunade's hands flew to her mouth at her own outburst. She looked over at the two boys sitting on the ground still covered in their blankets and her face went even redder when she met the curios gazes of her fellow genin. She turned her back away from her teammates and started to plead with her sensei again. When she turned she did not notice her pants slip showing a splash of red blood on them.

When the two boys noticed the red blood they both jumped up and ran to their injured teammate.

"Tsunade," Jiraiya cried out. "Are you ok? Did someone attack you?"

"I know some medical ninjutsu, would you like me to try to heal you?" asked Orachimaru.

"I am not injured and I don't need your help." Tsunade muttered while looking at the ground.

Jiraiya looked over at Tsunade's pants and realized where the blood had came from. He had several female cousins and recalled them gossiping about how horrible their monthly visitor could be and how when he had asked who the visitor was one of his crueler cousins had explained in gory detail. The white haired genin could feel his face heat up.

Orachimaru was not satisfied with the kunoichi's words decided he should press for more details. After all didn't their sensei always tell them their teammates were important and they had to care for each other. What could be more important than a teammate's health?

"Tsunade," the pale genin began patiently. "If you are hurt you should let us help you out. We are your team."

"It is just my period!" Screamed the blonde girl. "It has nothing to do with boys."

Orachimaru tilted his head to the side in confusion. "What does grammar have to do with you bleeding?"

Tsunade blushed even harder and hid her face in her hands.

Hiruzen looked at the poor kunoichi and sighed wondering what he had gotten himself into.

"I will go to a nearby village and get you the supplies you asked for," The Third Hokage told his distraught student.

Orachimaru still very in the dark on what was going on. Looked at his sensei and teammate in confusion. He was considered a prodigy and was not used to being the dark

"What is going on? Is she going to die?" He demanded.

Hiruzen grabbed the dark haired boy and whispered the secrets of female biology to him. Orachimaru's face looked increasingly horrified with the details.

"They must be evil monsters!" Orachimaru cried out. He looked over at Tsunade his eyes wide and terrified. "How can anything bleed for seven days every month and not die!"

At a loss for words Hiruzen decided it was best for him to go and get the feminine hygiene products Tsunade had requested and he disappeared in a flash of white smoke leaving his three students to work out things on their own. It would be just like a team building exercise.

Jiraiya walked over to his blonde teammate and softly put a hand on her shoulder.

"I am sure he did not mean anything by it," Jiraiya tried to console her.

Tsunade glared at Jiraiya before punching hard enough for him to fly head over heels into a nearby tree. She then stomped off into the woods to get away from the two boys.

After ten minutes Jiraiya was finally able to recover enough to stand up and he walked over to Orachimaru and sat beside the other boy. When the Orachimaru finally noticed the other boy he recalled how he was assaulted in his sleep by the other boy. The pale boy stood up and began walking into the woods in the opposite direction as Tsunade had gone. He did not want to be alone with the idiot but he was too scared to be near the bleeding monster either.

"Jiraiya," He said recalling what had woken him up. "You shouldn't sleep with a kunai, you could hurt yourself."

As the pale boy walked off Jiraiya sat by himself feeling puzzled. He never slept with his kunai.

Well I hoped you enjoyed. Please tell me what you think. I have never written humor before so I hope it was funny. I plan to do one for each generation. Next time Team Jiraiya.