Summary:
'I saw myself there.'
Post-War. The big war had finally ended. In a conversation between Tsunade and Sakura, we realized what it was like, looking back, at their lives.
-/-
'I saw myself there.'
Written by Termony
A Naruto Fanfiction
Disclaimer: I do NOT own any part of Naruto.
A spring morning.
In the medical team's office, there was Tsunade. She was looking at the monitor while scratching her head. Her still youthful face was marking the world with another one of her miracles. Her hair was getting messy. She was getting impatient.
It was a few years after the war. Sakura had just passed her spring birthday. She was 19 this year.
Tsunade was… getting old.
She remembered about Jiraiya. Somehow, the frustration pulled a string in her heart. The part where sadness lied. It was something that she felt really sad about.
She smiled. She thought, maybe… she did not love him enough.
Her face was a miracle. She knew. Sakura was learning it now. She knew.
She somehow started regretting looking this young herself. Youth came at a price. She felt artificial. The constantly unchanged face. She wanted to throw up.
Jiraiya… had a good face when he was getting older. He was not as good looking when he was younger.
I think… time had a price. I evaded it. With it, I acquired something special. I wish… I would enjoy it now…
But with the fire in me… I'm burning out.
She looked at the loading software. She could not bear the wait. She was looking through the database for some patients' files, but they were not loading. To her, it was not new, but she could not bear it.
I had a schedule…
She was supposed to have another meeting with a few important doctors at the hospital. It was getting frustrating.
However, she sighed and took notice of the time.
She better get going…
She's learning to live with it.
-/-
In the afternoon, she saw Sakura outside of the medical team's office. She was sitting on the bench. And the spring's warm air was blowing in this court yard.
"Why are you looking so sad?" Tsunade asked.
It was a question out of habit, but it was not usually asked to Sakura.
Sakura's pink hair was flying by the wind. The rouge of the head band was too attention grabbing.
Tsunade looked at it. The red forehead protector…
"I'm not that sad," Sakura said. "Only a little."
Tsunade was still unhappy.
"Why are you sad now? The war is over."
"Sasuke…" Sakura looked down onto the ground.
Tsunade was silent for a moment.
"I…" Tsunade said. "Can relate to it. I remember Dan…"
"You… did."
Tsunade looked at her pink hair again. She recalled her own hair was blond.
"You like him a lot right?" Tsunade asked. "I did too…"
"Sorry… I… just couldn't wave it away. But… he promised to come back, so… I…" Sakura said. "We did kill the enemies… So…"
Tsunade nodded. "We did. I think he'll be fine."
"In the war, those weirdos killed everyone! I wish… it's not like that! And Sasuke would be nice and sound! I wish Itachi didn't do that to him! And Orochimaru… I… hate them all…"
Tsunade was still for a moment. She patted Sakura on her shoulder and said. "I hated them too."
There were tear drops in Sakura's eyes. "I feel so useless. I wish… I can do more…"
Tsunade nodded. "I wish… We're all stronger."
"I mean… in medicine as well," Sakura said. "So many people died!"
Tsunade smiled sadly. "I know… but it's inevitable because there was war… And… This is how Shinobis are… We cannot avoid this fate. There is no way…"
Tsunade continued to say. "The weight of the village, is not something that easy to be carried on with. The village is… heavy, and as shinobis… we are… destined to be like this… unfortunately…"
Sakura felt sad. "I wish… there's a better way. That's why… I asked you to be my master, Tsunade master. I… want to save people as a medical ninja."
"As people… we bound to wanting to save lives," Tsunade said.
"I wish… I could follow my own ninja way, just like Naruto," Sakura said.
"That could be your goal," Tsunade smiled. "I think… I mastered it my own way too. It's time to find yours."
Sakura said. "I wish it could be the truth." She was smiling.
"Have confidence," Tsunade patted her on the shoulder again.
She really liked this pupil. She had fire.
Tsunade said. "Maybe… I liked gambling the most, but… you won't, right? There was Sasuke…"
"There was also Naruto…" Sakura said. "I wish I could be comparable to him… but it was only in the olden days… Now I'm too far behind. I just… want to find my way of ninjutsu. It's… not too hard to achieve right? It was like… the meaning of life! I wish… I really can do it!"
Tsunade looked at her. She was pleased to know that Sakura had grown out of her dislike of Naruto even though she still liked Sasuke.
"I believe you can," she said as she was smiling. "I think… you'll find your meaning of life. How about… as a medical doctor? You're already one!"
Sakura simled.
Tsunade sat down beside her. "You… it was your dream right?"
Sakura nodded excitedly. "I know… But… I feel so small in the world. I feel so small…"
"He seemed small too, but he had a big spirit. He really cared," Tsunade said.
Sakura nodded. "I'm so small…"
Tsunade looked at her with a warm smile. "You were brave in war."
Sakura smiled. "I was quite brave I realized. I wish I'm more than just a medical ninja though… I wish I could really do something to the bad guys…"
Tsunade felt sad. It was like Jiraiya…
Tsunade said. "You had another role. I wish I could stay as being the person responsible for the medical team as well. I wish it wasn't that much… But I had another role."
Sakura looked at her. "Thanks. Master."
"Naruto…" Tsunade looked at the cherry blossoms in the air as the wind blew. "Was a good ninja, but I don't really see him as a good leader. He wasn't a good leader."
"But… master… why?" Sakura asked. She was surprised.
"Because… he's not ready. He will be. I know. It takes time to grow up."
Sakura smiled as the cherry blossoms go down. The flowers…
"Just like everyone," Sakura said. "Just like everyone. We're learning more things… and we'll be ready as adults… I think we will be."
Tsunade looked at the pink in the court yard. "You're smart."
Her blond pigtails were being blown as well now. The wind was everywhere. Sakura felt it too. It was a windy spring.
Tsunade sighed. "It was because of him that I was able to fight again. I thought it was pretty cool. He faced the difficulties and he did not drown in the water, so he saved me."
Sakura knew it too, that somehow it was like that. However, Naruto never truly talked about too much of his experiences with everyone. But… somehow people knew, but her.
"Naruto was a good spirit," she said. "I'm growing up."
"I was blaming the war for the spirit…" Tsunade said. "If it weren't for the war, it won't be like this… everyone would be happy…"
"Master Tsunade…" Sakura looked at her. She was trying to capture what she said. For a moment, she could not concentrate because she was lost in her own thoughts.
"The war… I want to win."
Sakura looked at her, knowing it was something that she deeply felt as well.
It was… Sakura's wish as well. Of course, Tsunade realized it from looking at her facial expressions.
"Jiraiya, he gambled his life away," Tsunade remembered her gambling as well.
"I seemed to lose… fire… Maybe that was why… the wind was so soothing…" The wind was blowing fiercely onto her back.
Sakura was concerned. "I understand, Master Tsunade. Are you okay?"
"We both liked to drink…" Tsunade looked at Sakura's red forehead protector. "I'm sick. Used too much power in war…"
Sakura felt sad for Tsunade. Everyone was getting sick nowadays because of the war. All the missions were getting people worried. And more and more people were getting treated.
There was… a lot of people starting to fear the next one…
"Master…" Sakura looked at her.
"What?"
"Are you really worried?" Sakura was showing worry via her eyes.
"A little."
Sakura sighed. "Naruto said the same thing too. I think everyone was getting worried a little at least."
Tsunade smiled at faraway. "It's the inevitable."
"I want to… be able to do something, for everyone…" Tsunade looked at the birds on the trees. "So the little ones can grow."
"Master…" Sakura looked at her. She was surprised yet happy.
Tsunade said. "You had that look on your face again… I wish… you'll grow too."
End of Story
Author's Notes:
I kept on wanting to write a fanfiction on Naruto. Now I've done it! Anyway, wish for a good August. Today is August 1, 2016, Pacific Time. Cheers.