Her smile was always described as cheerful as the rising sun. Even on this most memorable, distraught of days it seemed to light up the room. She felt she had to radiate the kindness that she hadn't felt for so long. She had to try and recreate.
The girl walked along the sidewalk carefully. The sullen grey settings of the city of Seattle did nothing to ease her bitter mind. She trudged helplessly through puddle after muddy puddle, her umbrella hanging loosely from her hand as the rain poured down on her, soaking through her thin clothes.
After her mother passed on Carly never really accepted anything. She became blank and emotionless, even as young as she was. She never spoke about it, not even to Spencer.
A lonely tear trailed from the corner of her eye as she walked down the sidewalk, she knew where her feet would take her. As they did every year. Yet she still was afraid.
When her mother left her, so did a piece of her heart. The foundations of her life crumbled and whisked away, to fast to be re-captured and restored. Her family fell apart, her father departing for the army leaving her with a new-to-adult-hood Spencer, her grandfather being in yakama.
Like all the times before now the girl trailed her hand along the black wrought iron fence surrounding the place of rest, stopping to rest it on the opening of the gates.
She knew what had happened, her father hadn't hidden anything. She knew her mother was gone and never would return. She knew her life would forever be different. She knew she would never forget.
She pushed the gates open slowly. The hinges squeaked softly as they permitted her to enter the sacred resting place of the dearly departed. She pulled out her headphones and started listening to the soft hum off her favourite song.
To isolate herself from true connections she cut herself off. She listened to different music and changed herself, she adapted. Until Sam.
Carly looked down at the small black marble headstone above her mothers grave. She sighed and trailed her eyes to the sky. Even after all of this the thoughts of her best friend Sam seemed to offer comfort to her. She dropped to her knees unsteadily, more tears falling gracefully from her eyes.
Sam had been the light to her dark, the Yin to her Yang, The comfort to her distress. Sam had given back the hope that she had lost. Well. Some of it. Still she had thought enough of her best friend to be herself again. As much as her heart and mind allowed.
She let her hands rest on the top of the memo, crying the grief and distress out.
She had always thought that if she could just be a little stronger, had a little more backbone she could pass this on her own. After all 9 years is a long time to hold on to a death right?
Wrong.
And then there was Sam. She'd always be there. Carly knew this. She believed.
She opened her eyes and looked up slowly. Two warm caressing hands were placed on her own.
"Hey cupcake"
A soft smile.
Yes, Sam was always going to be there, She would get through this.