Disclaimer: These beautiful characters don't belong to me, but to the ingenious mind of Professor Tolkien and his marvellous work. All I own are my Aragorn and Éowyn dolls that I cherish.
"It is but a shadow and a thought you love." I reply quietly, my voice strained yet firm.
I look away quickly, unable to bear the unshed tears forming in those steely eyes. I am ashamed of the path I have chosen in relating my feelings for Éowyn. Ashamed of the cowardice manner, I have shattered the affection of such a fair and noble Lady. I could not bear to look into those grey eyes. So fierce, yet so desperate for release from her cage. I have refused the love of a woman, whom my heart has whispered into starless nights.
My love has long been pledged to Arwen, Evenstar of her kin and in the years which have followed, it has been nothing but faithful. Never have my eyes or my heart strayed until that fateful day in March, the day we entered the Golden Hall of Meduseld.
Though my gaze had settled on the intent battle between Gandalf and Theoden King, my eyes strayed ever so often to the tall figure behind the king. Momentarily I was stunned. For here, was the face of one whom I had seen many years before. This was none other than Theodwyn's daughter. Yet no longer was she that three year old, I had swept gaily in my arms. Her beauty astounded me. She was indeed the fairest mortal I had seen in my eighty-seven years. More beautiful than her famed mother and grandmother though neither was touched by the frost emanating from this maiden. Though as simple as it was to be captivated by her beauty, I sensed the desire to be free. She seemed trapped in this Hall somehow. The first look she gave to me as Theoden bid her leave left me trembling. For we had connected in an intangible way.
I left Dunharrow with my heart heavy as I rode to the Paths of the Dead but my mind contemplating on what course of action Éowyn would choose.
Now as I stand before the crowd of Gondor, my kin. The blood of Elendil flows through my veins as I utter those sacred words my ancestors vowed so many ages ago. I have promised the people I shall return the White City to its former glory. It is a pledge I intend to fulfil.
I walk slowly to greet my allies and I see the White Lady of Rohan, resplendent in a gown of purest gold silk. Her face flushed and beaming, whether it is with laughter or the happiness of this moment, I cannot say. Beside her, my Steward and Prince of Ithilien, Faramir. She smiles at me and I am utterly struck at the glowing light surrounding her. Gone is the anguish and torment, which have followed her since our departure, to her stay at the Houses of Healing and I am elated. Fame and glory she won for Middle Earth, in her fight against the Witch King of Angmar on the battle of Pelennor. A White City, for a White Lady I muse as I return her curtsey with a bow of my own.
Much later, I am standing quietly at one of the balconies, overlooking the revelries on the streets, while the laughter and the clangs of mugs never ceases behind me in the Great Hall of Merethrond. My fingers absently playing with the jewel upon my breast and my thoughts a swirl of emotions, Arwen has chosen her path I reflect and though I understood her reasons, my heart was sore. The soft swish of silks and the faint scent of Lavender invade the air as a small smile plays upon my face.
"Lady Éowyn, please join me." I ask as she laughs quietly and comes to stand beside me. I sense the peace flowing from her presence and I am comforted by it.
"Forgive my intrusion, my Liege. I came to see how you fared. Your absence, though noted, was not enough to cease the flow of ale and eats. The cooks are amazed at the quantities of ale both Meriadoc and Peregrin have consumed. They are at this moment on top of table, regaling others of the Songs of the Shire." we chuckled quietly and I look at her in wonder pondering the change her outlook. She is indeed beautiful in the moonlight and instantly I berate myself for such thoughts.
"Are you happy in the city?" I ask as she stares, past yonder into the dark fields before the main gates. Her face clouded for a moment of dread and sadness.
"A beautiful city my Lord, though stricken by battle, she shall once again be as beauteous as the Heralds have sung." She replies casting a glance at the walls, which surround her.
"With Rohan's alliance." I respond as she turns to me with a startled look.
"I am amazed you should even ask sire. Éomer had pledged friendship and loyalty since the days of your first meeting." She replies her eyes never leaving mine and I smile at her.
"That I know, and he has spoken of it many times this evening after every ale." I reply small smiles erupting on our faces and she turn to me, her eyes alight with mischief.
"My brother over- indulges himself too often, but this is a moment of happiness I will not scold him for. At our return to Rohan, he shall bear the weight of running a Kingdom upon his shoulders. Tonight is a chance to rejoice." She responds quietly as I shake my head in agreement.
Both Rohan and Gondor will welcome new Kings to their throne. Despite my years, both Éomer and I will be under severe scrutiny for our first term. Thank Eru I will have Faramir at my side in governance, while Éowyn will undoubtedly assist Éomer in the restoration of the Horse Land. Yet I wonder how long shall the White Lady reside in the Land of her birth?
"What of you My Lady?" I ask, knowing fully well, I was treading on deadly waters. Noting at once the icy walls seeming to build within her. I fear I have re-opened wounds, which though are healing are still fresh. It strikes me that for her to pay me this private visit she is testing herself. She turns to me, her grey eyes steely and clear, I detect anger and resignation within them, though her face betrays none of the emotions held in check.
"Another chance you gave me my Lord. My loyalty to both Rohan and Gondor shall remain until the end of my days. My fealty to you Elessar King shall be unwavering and true. As a Shieldmaiden, daughter, sister and niece I swear, never will my faith to the King diminish with the passing of time." She states quietly, here eyes never leaving mine. It is as though, she challenges me to release her from the hold that we have created.
I know now, that I have lost any chance of re-conciliation; Éowyn has found her peace and has released the painful past between us. In my unwavering faith to Arwen and our promise to each other, I have thrown away any possibility of a life with the White Lady. For a fleeting moment as we stood, I had envisioned her as being Queen of the White City. A Queen all would have loved and accepted as their own for her bravery and compassion. It is nothing more than vision I muse bitterly. She has journeyed onwards and I shall not restrain her. Arwen has chosen her path and though I cannot change my fate, I do wish I had never stated such harsh and undeserving words on that cold night in Dunharrow.
"Lady Éowyn, never have I doubted your loyalty or friendship." I reply with a forced smile, looking away from those eyes pristine in her words. The last word courses through my veins like poison. It was of my own doing that I face this predicament. I will have to choose some other to reside beside me, not for love but for the sole duty of the King to bring forth an heir. The role of King has already changed the course of Nature I ponder. One day I shall learn to forget the love that I have tossed so recklessly but it will not be this night.
"I thank you my for your kind words my Liege however I must depart. Merry has been waiting all evening. I fear he wishes to re-enact our battle for Frodo and the others." She sighs wistfully, as I bow deeply to her.
"As you wish Lady Éowyn. I do not desire to have Merry and Pippin on a war path with me for holding their Shieldmaiden at talk." She smiles at me, and stares briefly at the Evenstar. Her face devoid of all emotion, as I bring her hand to my lips. The warmth of her skin catches me off guard and I am unwilling and selfish to release her from my side.
"You have made your choice Aragorn. Leave her be, It can only be nothing more than a dream that was decided in a moment of panic."
"Thank you my Lord." She responds as she descends the stairs to the light before her.
I sigh and look at the stars, alight with Gandalf's fireworks and the shouts of the Gondorians in wonder at the strange beauty of these magics. The Valar are merciful and their wisdom bountiful, but they are humourless I reflect.
"Aragorn?" Éowyn's voice filters to me and I swiftly turn to see her only a few paces away from me. The familiarity of her tone comforts me and for a fleeting moment, the hope and visions I have seen flash before me.
"Eowyn." I whisper, giving her the time to think. It is her choice. Dare I believe she will give me another chance?
"It was more than a shadow and a thought, but time answers to no one but himself. The world has changed and with it brings new hope and chance for a new lease in life." She replies solemnly, before making a hasty retreat.
I turned to follow her, to explain and even plead for another chance to redeem my actions but I do not. No mortal can ever change time and I am no exception. I have suspicions of Faramir and herself, but he deserves her more than I could ever. For he did not desire another opportunity to make amends and with him, Éowyn will be free of those cages being Queen would have imposed upon her. We have won the war, but this brings me no peace. As Éowyn said, only time will bring a new lease of life. I can only hope that it will be kind to me, as I attempt to forget the past and look to the future of my people.