Her fingers trailed down past his arm and latched on for dear life over his own; her eyes were sad even as she pressed closer and stared down at Ryuuji.
Izumo took a deep breath that fell out in halves like an old, wretched chain saw that can only sputter with half a life.
Her tears fell down as her mind spun around in circles; there was her mother standing beside her two little girls before she fell in love, there was her mother when she finally found love, and finally, there was her mother when she started to die.
Izumo pushed out each ragged breath and stared down at someone that was changing her, changing her ever so slightly, making the dark worth a while for the light to shine in come morning.
She pushed her hair out of her face with her other hand and watched the even way he breathed in, felt envious for he had two parents to fall back on, two parents to love.
The Tamer sat down more solidly beside him, trying not to wake him as her world seemed to cave in in the dark and spasm further and further out of her control.
She couldn't do this; she couldn't breathe.
Izumo pulled in a ragged breath once again and remembered how she'd met her first friend and then how she found herself at Cram School and how that changed a broken little puzzle piece of her soul.
She remembered how she'd fought with Bon from day one, how Renzou always flirted with her both annoyingly and stubbornly; she remembered how she learned the truer, more definite form of friendship through Shiemi, and how she learned to admire others and see just how far she'd come.
Izumo pressed into a warm shoulder and lost herself under the spell of it as her tears finally collapsed out of her again, and as she clung for dear life to Bon, because it suddenly felt that he was all that she had.
She'd had a mother once and had never lost her sister, but still Bon stood out to her like a large tree stands out in a barren landscape, how beautiful it was, and she found herself pressing closer, kissing his head, his eyelids, for she knew that he wasn't awake and couldn't catch her in this act.
Izumo had never imagined that following her desire to become an Exorcist would lead to this confusing maze of feelings that she was never supposed to feel, but a broken part of her drifted away in Bon's presence, and it was scary to say the least.
She pressed down into his embrace, drying her tears on his sleeve, and trying to find her place in romance, and what that could all mean to her.
Izumo had sworn against love, sworn her whole life through since her mother fell in love, and now found herself staring at a sleeping man and knowing that it was no use to swear against this.
She was in love and was slowly learning how to not isolate the two of them and slowly learning how to love truly; Bon had even acted like an amazing big brother to Tsukumo, and Izumo couldn't ask for more. It was impossible to ask for more than ths man that riled her up on both the best and the worst days and made her fall so irresistibly in love with him.
Izumo took a deep breath and knew that her world was shifting, changing, and the old truths became just dust to blow away in the wind.