Okay, so this is a fanfic i wrote on a whim. anyway, i know i haven't been updating for a while and i wanted to make it up to you guys, so i decided to write another depressing ficcy so i can practice. ;) hope it is depressing because if it's not then it just proves what a bad writer i am. haha. anyway, go on. read, read!
Disclaimer: If i owned Naruto it would be nonexistent because i would have given up and thrown the papers in the trash before the first chapter was completed. Good on ya, Kishimoto-san!
"So."
She was beautiful. So, so, beautiful. I wanted, at that moment, more than ever to reach out to those short, pink locks and feel their softness under my fingers. I could, in a flash. But I knew I shouldn't. I had never been allowed to do so in the first place.
I didn't even deserve that pained look in her jade-green eyes.
What I deserved was the harsh tone of her voice, which told such a different story.
"I've found you." Even though I had mentally tried to prepare myself, I couldn't help but flinch, and draw my eyes away from her clear, piercing ones. Keep up the act, Sasuke. Remember, you still have to take your revenge on Konoha, said the voice from somewhere in my mind. I turned my scowl into a bitter laugh.
"So you have. What of it?" It took all my strength just to be able to pull off a glare at her. "You know you can't take me back. Nobody can."
Now it was her turn to flinch, and I caught a flash of something akin to vulnerability in her expression before she shook her head and said in a dead voice, "I'm not here to take you back, Sasuke."
My eyes narrowed. "I told you, Sakura. You have no place as my partner."
She shook her head again. "I'm not here to join you, either."
She wasn't here to take me back to Konoha. She wasn't here to join me.
Then that must mean…
She had come to kill me.
I closed my eyes. So be it, then.
"Go on."
"What?" Her fair features clouded with confusion.
"Take my life. It's yours."
Her face hardened.
"Liar."
I knew I had caught her off guard with my words, but this was a first. And I then realized that Sakura had changed. She wasn't the fragile sakura sapling that I was so familiar with anymore. She had grown into a full-fledged, strong tree, and...she didn't need me.
My surprise must have shown on my face, because one corner of her pretty mouth turned upwards, and she cocked her head to one side, taking a step forward. Her voice cut through the air again, slowly rising to a crescendo.
"You think I'm still going to follow you around, hoping you'll acknowledge my existence someday? Some godforsaken day that I now know will never come? Come on, Sasuke. People change. You may not, but I will, and I have. I don't know you, and you don't know me. We're enemies on this battlefield, and that's all that matters."
Her speech felt like a stake being driven into my chest. I knew people said emotional pain hurt more than physical, but this was extreme. I took several deep breaths, tearing my eyes away from her accusing ones and flung my sword at her. It landed with a clatter at her feet.
Ignoring her startled cry, I turned my back on her.
"Try me," I said.
For a while I felt nothing, and waited for her to realize I was serious. And I had no warning when a massive force struck me between the shoulder blades and I fell forward. I didn't resist, waiting for the inevitable contact with the long grass.
What I had expected was to end up seeing the darkness and smelling the damp scent of earth. Instead I found myself lying on my back, the faint fragrance that was symbolic of Sakura filling my nose as she leaned over me.
She raised her arm, sword gripped so tight I could see the muscles in her hand trembling, and I closed my eyes, smiling as I did so. My palm swept around in grass, searching for her other hand, and I found it, grasping it firmly under mine. God, her skin felt so satiny and smooth under my own it was hard to believe she could possibly be a kunoichi.
The seconds seemed to crawl by like honey, before something wet fell onto my cheek, and an object fell to the ground with a thump beside me. The next thing I was aware of was an intense, searing pain as her fist came into contact with my jaw. Then more came, this time on my torso and I opened my eyes to see an astonishing sight.
Sakura was crying.
Warm tears were falling like raindrops from those mesmerizing eyes as she continued to hurl blows at me. My sword lay askew at my side where she had dropped it, and I finally gathered the sense to grab both of her wrists and hold her still.
I gazed at her tear-streaked face softly. She didn't struggle, only sat there with her head hung.
"I couldn't. I couldn't kill you. I'm sorry, I just couldn't," she gasped hysterically as her small frame shook. Following what must have been natural instinct, I reached up and brushed away the wetness on her cheeks carefully. Despite everything, she was still the old Sakura inside.
And at that moment my strength broke and I gave in to temptation, pulling her into my arms.
It was like a great coincidence, how we both fitted so well. My arms wrapped around her small waist felt like the most natural thing in the world and I didn't want to let go even when she stopped shivering.
"Why did you apologise?" I murmured in her ear. She slowly unwound herself, closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
When she opened them again they were calm once more. She didn't answer my question, only shook her head once and stared at me sadly.
"I'm sorry," she repeated.
Frustration seeped through me. "Don't you understand?" I whispered to her, clenching my jaw. "I should be the one saying sorry. And I'll say it now. I'm sorry. What part of "my life is yours" don't you get? I don't want it. I don't want it, Sakura."
Her eyes searched mine desperately, and found no salvation. I could only look back into hers desolately. I had never felt so helpless then. I honestly, truly didn't know how to respond to Sakura, whom I had wanted to see again since the meeting at the base. I thought I had cut off these bonds. I had wanted to cut off my bonds with her. So why couldn't I?
"Why? Why do you want me to kill you?" The sound of her choked voice broke through my thoughts.
Inside, I already knew what the answer was.
Because I stole your happiness.
"You know why, Sakura. I took everything away from you, didn't I? I took away your hopes, your dreams, didn't I? And I'm sorry for that, but you and I know that it won't be enough. All I've caused you is pain, and suffering, and I don't want to any longer. So please, before I do anything else, kill me."
I stood, taking my sword with me as I did.
"Ever since Konoha ordered Itachi to murder the rest of the Uchiha clan, my only goal had been to seek my revenge on him. Now I have, and I know the truth; the bare truth." I straightened up. "I have always been an avenger. But I cannot, and will not, destroy Konoha for what it did. Do you know why? Because the very thing I want to demolish is a part of you. Doing so would be equivalent to crushing your heart beneath my feet, and I'm already tired of it."
I saw her draw in a long, shuddering breath of hesitation.
"Please, Sakura."
For a few seconds there was no reaction from Sakura. Then, slowly, she pulled herself into a standing position to face me. Her lips parted, and she sighed in a hoarse voice, "I'm such an idiot, aren't I? Even after all these years I can't follow Shinobi Rule No. 25; to kill all your emotions in the event of a mission. I regret that it has come to this, Sasuke."
"Me too," I replied softly. My free hand reached out to touch her face as I took a step forward. Sakura's small hand wrapped around the hilt of the sword as she, too, approached gradually.
I looked down into her forest-green eyes one last time, determined to imprint their contours into my mind. I searched for something to say to her, and found nothing but the most honest words I ever knew.
"I love you. I'm sorry."
Her lips captured mine as the blade plunged.
I know, another random ending. i'm not very good at them, you know. but i'm too lazy to change it and that's that, so you'll gave to make do.
Tell me whether it's any good at all. you know the button to click...
Until next time,
ScarletInk314