In the jōnin training, they'd taught them to be patient. Patience was important when you were in charge of a genin group, and Kakashi liked to think he had plenty of it. He'd actually already proved himself several times in previous missions, because when Uzumaki Naruto was one of your students there was nothing less to be expected from you; but by this point he was starting to wonder if maybe he was just too good at pretending.
Because, may the sweet Gods of ninja forgive him, it was from all of a sudden that he wasn't feeling humanly capable of taking his team's childish tantrums anymore. In his defense, he'd had a very long day, his three genin had been injured during that morning's mission, they'd been discussing all day ever since and the trip to the hospital had been particularly stressful. Worst thing was, Sasuke had been the one to blame for most of it.
But then, even after all of that, when the blissful silence on their way back to the village was broken by some stupid bickering that Naruto started but Sakura and Sasuke continued, Kakashi still put big effort into trying and make his breathing exercises work. However, everything went to hell in the precise second Sasuke took Naruto by the collar of his shirt and shoved him against the trunk of the nearest tree.
Naruto, of course, responded by absolutely forgetting that his teammate had been strangled to unconsciousness just that morning and slamming his forehead against his; for he surely had nothing inside of that pretty little blond head of his he should be worried about damaging. Sasuke would have taken that hit graciously any other day, but not that one.
That small impact and the consequent bend of his neck had him crying out, gasping and nearly falling from the tree as he doubled over in a desperate attempt to conceal his pain. Naruto, realizing his big mistake, immediately held him by the shoulders and slowly guided him to his knees. Sasuke slapped his hands away, naturally.
The picture of Naruto's baby blue eyes shining with regret didn't awake the littlest bit of sympathy from Sakura, as expected, and she threw such a mean look at his direction that Kakashi almost took her by the wrist to keep her from going to check on Sasuke. As soon as she was at their side, she made it her personal mission to tell Naruto how stupid he was and how he just never did anything right. Ignoring completely that Sasuke had been the one to hurt him first.
Then Sasuke slapped Sakura's hands away when she tried to see his neck, making her shriek, and he kicked Naruto against the tree once more.
And that was it.
Kakashi snapped.
He wasn't aware of what he was doing until he had suddenly taken Sasuke by his shirt, hauled him up like he weighted nothing more than a handful of kittens and sat him on his lap. The boy was so bewildered by this that he didn't even make an effort to stop him from carefully tilting his chin in different directions in order to examine closely the hideous purple marks that peeped over his bandages, courtesy of the enormous hands that had tried to choke him hours ago.
After determining that he hadn't been injured further, at least not to an extent his next dose of anti-inflammatories and muscle relaxant wouldn't be able to fix, he let go of Sasuke's face and allowed himself to be confronted by his tiny student's trademark Uchiha glare. This time Kakashi didn't give back a silly smile, like he used to. This time, he looked Sasuke dead in the eye and allowed him to see how unpleased he was.
Before the little bastard could gather enough air in his lungs to make some snarky remark, Kakashi took him by the shirt again and forced him down to lay on his stomach. The Third Hokage would probably want to murder him when he found out he'd done this to a student with a strain in his neck, but he'd forgive him as soon as he found out how many fights Sasuke had tried to pick in less than twelve hours.
And how he'd thrown himself once again into the open arms of danger earlier that day.
Remembering the scene from that morning had Kakashi bringing his hand down in one slap so firm that it left his hand stinging, even through his gloves. The genin in his lap jumped and then stayed so awfully still and quiet for so many seconds that for a moment Kakashi feared he'd broken him.
Then the boy slowly turned his head back as much as his neck would allow and observed him with wide eyes.
"Don't you dare," Kakashi warned when he saw him wince. "Look down. Now. I'm not having you making the pain worse."
"You just hit me," Sasuke muttered, once again dumbfounded.
"No, you hit your comrades," Kakashi said. "I am disciplining you. It's what it is called when a sensei gets fed up with a student's attitude. Now, Sasuke. Look. Down."
Sasuke frowned, and that frown slowly deepened as he took in what was happening. By the time Kakashi took his gloves off, the boy had finally recovered his wits and was snarling at him looking like the most enraged kitten he'd ever had the misfortune of encountering. Kakashi had enough tact to gently guide Sasuke's head back down before he brought his hand down again on the same spot.
And Sasuke lost it.
Had Kakashi not been expecting his trashing and flailing, he would have probably dropped him. But he knew his student way to well not to know how to react to that, so he simply sat down against the tree behind him and used one of his legs to pin down Sasuke's while the boy vowed on giving him the most painful death he could ever imagine.
He had an awfully vast knowledge of profanities for a kid his age. After having firmly secured Sasuke's wrists against the small of his back, Kakashi gave him another three quick smacks to show how displeased he was with his language. Sasuke cursed yet once more.
Then he aimed for Sasuke's other cheek, and the fifth slap had the boy already crying out in pain. Kakashi felt disconcerted about that at first, but then he recalled their trip to the hospital. They'd given Sasuke an injection, for the pain and the inflammation, and since he wasn't fond of needles ever since Haku's incident, he'd put up a fight to try to avoid it. His whimpers had made it very clear to Kakashi that it'd hurt him a lot, but that probably was because the brute nurse hadn't been particularly sweet at administering it while Kakashi restrained him.
Though he wanted to give him a lesson, it didn't feel fair for Kakashi to say he didn't want Sasuke feeling more pain on his neck but going on anyway and making him hurt where he was already hurting. So, he concentrated only on the unharmed right side of his student's rear, but he gave him five smacks in succession to compensate for it.
"You are not allowed to turn against your own teammates," Kakashi landed some more slaps on Sasuke's undercurve, and then on his thighs. "And I don't ever want to see you again starting a fight when you're hurt, Sasuke. That's just stupid. Being upset because of a bad day is okay, throwing a tantrum is not. Start acting your age."
Sasuke jerked again, though this time it was a weak attempt. Then he stopped moving and hung his head lower, his shoulders shaking almost imperceptibly. It made Kakashi realize the punishment shouldn't last much longer, so he resolved for starting to slow his pace.
"And I think this is obvious enough, but I don't ever, ever—" Kakashi brought his hand down particularly hard to accentuate his statement, making Sasuke jump again. "Want to see you trying to take down an enemy thrice your size alone, young man. If that ever happens again under my tutelage, you're going to be very, very sorry."
Hearing something that sounded like a very soft sob made Kakashi shudder, but he forced himself to finish.
"You're very strong, Sasuke, and smart. You're. So. Much. Better. Than. This. Behave like it."
He added one slap between each word and then, after adding the last one a bit of emphasis for good measure, he immediately started tracing slow circles with his stinging hand on Sasuke's lower back. Then he heard the sobbing again, and he took in a deep breath.
"Take your time," He granted, giving the cheek of the injection a gentle rub to ease the pain he was sure he'd reawakened. "I still need to talk to your teammates anyway, so you don't need about hurrying to compose yourself. You and I already had our conversation."
He raised his head and acknowledged the presence of his other two tiny demons for the first time since he'd taken Sasuke over his lap. The kids were looking down, deeply ashamed, and when their eyes finally went up Kakashi made sure to give them back a stern look, no matter how much they resembled of a pair of very sorry ducklings.
"I'll be dealing with you two later, Naruto and Sakura," He said, relief washing over him at feeling that Sasuke's breathing had started to regularize again. "What you two did wasn't okay either. You're a team. How many times am I going to have to tell you that? I'm very, very upset with the three of you. Team 7 will be taking D missions for the next two weeks."
If he'd thought Sakura's sweet and sad eyes couldn't look any larger, he was wrong.
"And don't think that's it," Kakashi warned, at the same time he helped Sasuke into a sitting position again. The boy was stiff with shame and grumpiness, but the skin at the edge of his eyes and some patches on his cheeks were still red because of the tears. "This last fight was the last straw. If Sasuke got this punishment, then so are you two. I haven't decided when, but you'll know, don't worry."
Sakura squealed in terror, and Naruto covered his face with both hands. To his surprise, even Sasuke looked at him straight in the eye once more.
"No," Sasuke muttered, frowning and still sniffing a little. "Well, maybe Naruto. But not Sakura. She didn't do anything."
"Hey, you bastard! " Naruto protested immediately, but Kakashi fixed him with a single look that made him squeal just like Sakura. "I mean, I also think it's not fair for Sakura-chan. But Sasuke was the one to start the fight! I was just defending myself, sensei!"
Kakashi slowly threaded his fingers through Sasuke's hair, feeling his muscles starting to loosen up a little. Given that the boy on his lap made no attempt to snap his wrist or bite him, he allowed himself to gently scratch his nape too. At least it looked like someone had learned his lesson.
"I appreciate the fact that you both care for Sakura so much," Kakashi said, blatantly ignoring Naruto's desperation not to be in trouble. "But she also left much to be desired from her teamwork aptitudes. I'll go a lot easier on her, though."
He guided Sasuke to stand up and then he did the same, ignoring the glare from his two male students. He wasn't looking forward to it, either, but at the jōnin training they'd also been taught not to treat the girls in their group any differently than the boys. He already indulged Sakura enough by taking her as a priority to protect when there was danger.
After an onceover to make sure that Sasuke was okay, Kakashi nudged him towards the other two little devils. He would make sure to give him all the comfort he needed as soon as they were settled somewhere for the night, the last thing he needed was for some other ninja on the road to see him coddling his students.
"Now, let's go," He urged them. "You've all been slow enough all day. We have to be half the way back by the night. In silence, please."
No one complained. The three were pouting and sulking, but they didn't seem in the mood to scream like they'd been doing in the last hours. Kakashi almost sighed in delight.
They were almost cute when they were this obedient.