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'You are being unreasonable.'
'Should I call N'Champoo to help me?!'
'I'm… I'm sorry. I'll be right back.'
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.
Those are the words that I've said…
Did my voice show the instant pain I felt?
Did my voice quiver?
Did my voice let out the ache?
Ae said a name.
And not just an ordinary person's name… But her name. Champoo.
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I walked fast outside the library when I felt a liquid slide down my cheeks. I hurriedly wipe it with my hand and utter a blessing that the corridor was empty, most of the students are either in the Library studying for the upcoming exams or in their respective rooms.
He doesn't want anyone seeing him like this.
He was nearing the bathroom when a hand grabs his arm and he almost slam onto a hard chest.
'Pete.'
'T-Tin…'
Pete looks at Tin and he knew, when the later's jaws harden, he knew Tin saw his eyes.
'Did Ai Thai Program finally break you?'
Pete avoids Tin's gaze and looks down.
Pete try so hard to stop it… He needs to stop it… He bites his lips to stop the sob.
But as much as he wants to stop the tears, even without sound, it just flowed.
Tin let out a sigh and his hand on Pete's arms tighten.
'Here,' Tin gives Pete his car keys.
'W-What… Keys?'
'Listen. Got to my car. I don't care if you cry your hearts out, but not here. Not in a damn bathroom where anyone can hear you. My car is tinted yours is not. Go there now.'
'But…'
'No buts. I'll ask question later. But for now, go to my car.'
'My things…'
'I'll get your things.'
'I-I have to go ba-'
'Do you really wanna go back?'
Pete slowly shook his head.
'Then go to my car. Its park near the Sports Science.'
Pete nodded.
Tin looks at Pete's back as the tall Prince walks and vanished from his view. He slowly trudge the way to the library. He doesn't need to hurry. Was there even a time of his life that he runs or hurries? Everything he needs he can accomplish, everything he wants he can get. He become a master of tolerance. Patience is a virtue, that anyone doesn't have. But he has it. Time is of the essence… but he likes to anticipate the reward while waiting. It gives him a great satisfaction to see the result of his waiting.
He can endure a lot and when it is time for him to pay them back, he makes sure the one who will receive his wrath will feel it a hundred times more.
Those who have crossed him regretted it and wanted nothing to do with him ever again.
He lives by the name Ice Prince. Cold hearted Prince. Demon Ice Prince.
He doesn't give a damn.
If they so much step on his foot, he would surely step on their face. That's who he is and that's how he lives.
And due to that, he never have any friends.
Truth be told, does he even have one?
Pete.
Yes. It's Pete.
He has several friends back in UK but those are superficial friends. The only one who he adds in his private facebook account here in Thailand is Pete.
Pete is the only one who didn't flinch from his icy glare, icy voice, icy words. But then again, Pete is like a child. He seldom uses his iciness to the young master.
Pete is his childhood friend per se, both have been born with a silver spoon on their mouth. They don't actually meet as a child but more of their circle of family.
Pete came from the high rich family who owns several hotels and steel works. While he has his own legacy attach to his name.
He and Pete doesn't need to comPete for the later is so forgiving, giving, gentle and doesn't have a mean bone on his body. And he doesn't want to comPete with Pete, it's like competing against his own child.
He can't say brother for he hates that word. It is used by his own to accomplished such dirt on him. Even brothers can steal and kill you. That's the word he lives in.
He likes Pete. Not in a romantic way, but more like of a little lost child. He knew about Pete's sexual preferences and at first he wanted to cure Pete and protect the innocent lamb from being slaughtered by the common poor people. But its seems that the Ai Thai Program already did something that curing Pete won't be any use now.
He came to realize that he just doesn't want to lose Pete in someone who will just use him.
Pete deserves someone better and he is the much better preference for the Young Master. But he is not someone who force nor someone who will keep on forcing himself to the other when the other party keeps on rejecting him. He is too arrogant and prideful for that kind of play. He is not a masochist.
He keeps at bay and watches Pete from afar…
Even when that annoying little football monkey kept on pestering and invading his space, he doesn't lose his cool or he did once or twice, but not enough to shake his disposition.
But what shake his mind and heart was when he saw Pete looking lost and alone while trying his best to keep the tears at bay.
It broke his heart that someone so pure and gentle will hurt this Prince.
Yes.
He can add to his list the reason why he consider Pete as his friend and will do favours for him because the Young Master is a gentle soul. He knew about his family matters especially the scandal about his father marrying the secretary and divorcing the mother, but Pete, instead of being vindictive, turn into a more loving and humble person. His mother taught him well and anyone who gets to know Pete will know the beautiful household he was born into. A household with so much love and warmth.
He doesn't understand who would do such thing as to hurt his friend.
He did more than research about that P'Trump guy and from what he had gathered, the bastard blackmailed his friend, and not just blackmailed, he even dared to lay a finger on someone like Pete. He had his men search high and low for the good for nothing son of a bitch and he will deal with him later. Ai Thai Program may have the brute force of a raging bull but that can never stop a bastard like Trump. What Trump needs is a good years behind bars.
That bastard will pay for what he did to Pete. He had already erase the records that Trump have after searching for Pete's personal belongings. The expensive watch and the phone which was already sold - but the store have saved the data inside of the phone which he easily got.
Money can buy anything and he is using it to his means.
Tin lazily gaze on the library tables, he saw that many are looking at him and whispering - yes - after all, he never steps foot on this library. Why would he mingle with commoners whose only goal is to use him and his family name.
Some gaze from girls and boys are full of admiration and desire, while others are full of contempt who had received some of his nasty remarks.
He don't care and he don't give time to care.
He located the table of the Ai Thai Program and it looks like its good that Pete didn't return. The table is now full of Ai Thai Programs from different colleges and he saw that the annoying monkey is there with them.
He slowly approaches the table.
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Pond nudge Ae who is busy typing with so much vehemence in his phone while the others looks up at the man approaching them.
Pond was asking Ae where Pete have gone too and if he did something that would upset Pete, knowing his friend who have no romantic nor sombre voice when pissed. Pond likes Pete as a friend and considers Pete as his friend-in-law, that's why most of the times, he will hurry and go after Pete whenever Ae runs his harsh mouth. Ae is not loudmouth like him but more of a brawl harsh mouthed son of a beast.
Ae looks at the IC bastard with so much loathe and stands up.
'What do you want?' Ae asked with so much rage in his voice. The bastard who wants to break him and Pete up. He doesn't know why this motherfucker is here but if he so much plans to break him and Pete up he have no qualms to punch his face, right now his anger is at the maximum level. He kept on trying to call Pete but he can't get through, all his messages are not read. Pond told him to give Pete some time before going to the bathroom (that's the only place Pete will go too). But it has been more than half an hour.
'I don't want anything from you,' Tin said in an icy voice that the place suddenly quiets and they feel an instant chill.
Ping and Bow looks at each other and whispers, 'North Pole B1,' 'No B2, Arctic Pole.' Chaaim then whispers, 'Both are the same thing.'
'What I want is this,' Tin said while reaching for Pete's bag.
Ae suddenly snatch it back. 'This is not yours.'
'I know Ai Thai Program. And that is not yours either. Give it to me.'
'Why the fuck should I give it to you?!'
Silence.
The students who had heard the exchange can't help but get curious. Pond, Ping, Bow, Chaaim, Good and Can was looking at the two male.
The Ice Prince versus The Beast King.
Pond gulped and exchange looks at Ping who shook his head. Not knowing what to do.
Then Tin gave them his annoying arrogant and know it all smirk, 'Fine. You can have it. I can buy the exact thing inside of Pichaya's bag and knowing him, he only have his books, notes and pen there. Which I can easily replace.'
Tin was about to turn around when Ae with the voice of a growling beast, 'Where the hell is Pete?' Ae's knuckles are in fist and the veins in his head can be seen.
How dare this IC bastard calls his Koon Chai with his full name!
Tin raised his perfect eyebrow, 'You tell me Ai Thai Program. Shouldn't he be here with you? You and this poor kids.'
'Oi! Ai bastard IC Kid!' Can yelled and was about to stand and join Ae when Good slaps his mouth with his hand to shut him up. Ping and Pond helps Good to stop Can.
Not one but two football player about to throttle an IC kid inside the library will spell disaster and suspension for all of them.
'Stop insulting us and tell me where is Pete?' Ae asked, holding his anger.
'Call him. He is yours... didn't you tell me that. He will surely answer you.'
Tin turns around and without looking back, 'Keep the bag. You can sell the contents if you want.'
'Ai IC Bastard! Come back here! I'll punch your face!' Can yelled and was about to say something more when this time Good, Pond and Ping shuts his mouth with their hands. Others are looking at them.
Chaaim hides her face with an opened book, while Pond keeps on bowing in apology to the other students.
'Ai Ae… seat down friend. You know he's just provoking you. Call Ai Pete. He will answer you - just give him a little time. Okay?' Pond said while tapping Ae's back. Pond pray to all the gods that his friend will listen. He knew Ae in beast mode and this Ae is not someone who will back down with little words. Pond looks at Ping and Bow for help.
Ping and Bow looks at Pond with faces: 'WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?! WHERE IS PETE?'
Pond close his eyes tightly remembering that it's only him and Chaaim who knew about Ae's stubborn ass refusal to let Pete teach him.
Ae shrugs Pond's hold on him and grabs Pete's bag and his, without turning around he went out of the library.
'What the hell is happening? Why is that motherfucker insulting us and Ai Ae? And you guys! Why the hell did you stop me from punching that son of a bitch?!' Can asked and Pond told them about Ae being a stubborn bastard, though he left out the Champoo part. It was a dick move even for Ae to say that. He was nosy and pestering Ae why Pete hadn't return and Ae told him about the Champoo part. Of all the name the Shorty would mention - why the blazes hell that girl who thinks Ae was her hero.
He rolled his eyes and muttered, 'Ai Clumsy Lover.'
Pond looks at Chaaim who shook her head indicating that Pete was not answering her calls too.
'Damn. The dorm would be hell.'
He is now thinking whose place can he sleep over.
A raging Ae is never a good room mate. Shoes will fly and he knew himself being nosy and he cant stop it - he will die by karate chop by Ae.
'Oi Ping! Let me sleep over!'
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Tin went to his car and as he opens the door he heard Pete stops his sobbing. He went inside and put on his seatbelt.
'Put yours.'
'H-huh?' Pete asked in a confused state, Tin sighed and went on to put Pete's seatbelt.
'Tin… my car is just on the other parking-'
'I know. Just cry.'
'Tin-'
Tin didn't listen and starts his car.
Pete didn't argue when he saw the icy look Tin gave him. He will get his car later.
There was silence.
Tin again let out a tired sigh, 'Pete. Cry. I am not going to ask anything. Just cry and don't force yourself to stop. Here, tissue,' Tin open his compartment drawer and pulls a new box of tissue.
Pete didn't say anything but accepts the tissue.
Pete tries not to cry but it was hard.
He knew he was weak, he knew that he is never a brave person from the start. He tries his best to be understanding and to understand reasons…
But he never knew that a single name can shatter his heart into a million pieces.
Why her name Ae?
Why her?
Do you think of her?
Do you regret being with me?
Am I being unreasonable?
I love you but it hurts…
Pete closes his eyes and clench his chest. It's painful… to painful… He covers his mouth with his hand to stop the sobbing. Though the tears keeps on flowing down his cheeks.
Pete knew about Ae being rough, harsh and brutally honest, the way he have no qualms to smack Pond's head, reprimands Pond, he even said it himself that he is a straightforward person and honest in his feelings…
Why?
Why Ae?
Why would you say such thing?
Does that mean… at the back of your mind… you like her?
The sting inside of his heart burns…
Ae said he will never hurt him…
Ae said he will protect him…
Ae is like his saviour…
Ae is a gentle knight to him…
But what he said…
He felt so much betrayed.
Ae should know better. Using the name of a girl Pete so much pushed him to be with it… He clenches his chest once again, trying so hard to stop the pain inside of it.
It hurts.
So painful.
There's no other words that can describe his feelings but the word - hurts .
He was never a vindictive person and will never use other names just to shut people up.
Is this how it is to others? Using other people to get what they want? Is this the reason that Tin doesn't trust anyone?
He was betrayed and hurt by P'Trump. He was blackmailed and he was beat up. But the ache inside of him is worst than the beating he received. It would have been better if Ae just told him to shut up or to go away.
He was so engrossed to his suffering and was startled when a loud honk breaks the silence.
He looks right and left and was surprised to see the car in a basement parking.
Pete looks at Tin, 'Where?'
'Mall.'
'M-Mall?'
'Yes. I need to buy a new software and I want to buy it now. So get out of the car and come with me.'
'Eh - T-Tin…'
'You have cried your hearts out for more than 2 hours. We have been parked here for the last 45 minutes and I am also hungry and by the looks at it, you don't even know that you're hungry. I heard a small sound from your stomach.'
Pete blush and holds his stomach.
'So arrange yourself. Wipe your tears if you want, I don't care what people may say but you might.'
Tin gets out of the car and Pete fixes himself.
They walked towards the elevator.
They were silent.
When they entered the mall entrance, eyes are drawn to them. Tin was aware of the stares but he didn't pay it any mind, he is used being stared at, Pete who was thinking so deeply was unaware and just walk like a porcelain doll following Tin.
The stares of awe and admiration is visible in all the eyes of the onlookers, whether it be male or female, young and old, they cannot help but gape and gasped at the beauty before them.
Both are tall, taller than your average Thai men. Both have white skin, though the doll looking guy has a more fairer and silky smooth skin. At first they are drawn to Tin's stance and his arrogant look. He was very very handsome. A handsome man with an attitude you want to delve in. It's like those protagonist male you read in Harlequin pocketbooks and thick novels, an arrogant dominant Icy Prince. While they appreciate the handsomeness of Tin once they have turn and look at the other man, they cannot help but gasped and some even stumble.
Pete looks like an angel who descends upon Earth. His smooth skin looks like of a vintage exquisite porcelain doll, his soft brown hair crowns his head while covering his forehead, those thick eyelashes looks so stunning, the reddish cheeks looks soft and those lips! My god! Those lips should be outlawed. A perfect cupid bow red lips that you often see in your sweetest dreams kissing you. They so want to see the colours of his eyes, but Pete's head was downcast.
They were walking when Tin stops and Pete bump into his back.
'Ouch,' Pete softly said and massage his forehead. Tin looks back and grins, 'Watch where you're going.'
Tin took Pete to different stores looking for the software he needed.
They entered the fifth store and the sales lady cannot help but ogled Tin, he on the other hand is looking at Pete who was standing without any expression on his face aside the feeling of a lost child. He sighs. How many sigh have he left out just for today?
He paid for the software and tap Pete's shoulder.
'Let's eat.'
'Huh?'
'Eat.'
Pete nodded and they headed to TasanaNakorn, a sky-view restaurant zone at the mall. There are less people and the place is semi-private. They settled near the balcony and ordered food, rather Tin ordered for them.
'What are you going to do?'
'Tin?'
'The reason you're dying inside is because of the Ai Thai Program correct?'
'I-I… I.'
'Don't answer. If I wait for your answer I'll have grey hair. Eat your food. After this we will go watch a movie.'
'Huh? Tin, I-'
'What? You're going back to your apartment? To do what? Cry? Spill your guts out by your pillow? Die more inside? Overthink like the world will end?'
'Tin…'
'Listen Pete. I don't care what you feel about that Ai Thai Program. But I do care about you. I am spending time with you cause I know what will you do if I left you alone. I've been there and done that. You don't have to be an emotional wreck because of someone. Eat, shop, watch a movie with me. Don't think about anything for a moment and just stare at the things in front of you. It's not the end of the world.'
Pete bites his lips, stopping the tears from flowing once again.
'What you are experiencing right now, I am not to judge the weight of your problem. We all have pain inside of us. Being betrayed and being hurt by the person we love and trust. It is up to you how you handle it. But right now I am here. I consider you as my only friend. And as your only friend, I will spoil you on how I know. Stop thinking.'
Pete nodded.
The food was delectable but Pete wasn't able to taste any. Everything felt bland. It's as if everything lost its flavours and colours.
Pete looks at the sky… it was the darkest of blue… the stars are hiding… there's a milky way of grief inside of him.
'Get up Pete. I've paid the bill.'
Like a robot, he moves according to Tin's. They went inside the cinema. Tin didn't even say anything. He bought the tickets and they sat side by side watching a black and white film.
Its the time of the month where the cinema offers a throwback movies in black and white, either in silent or with audio.
Tin chose a silent movie… where everything was depicted by emotions and actions…
Tin slowly move his head and he felt an ache inside his heart…
Pete was again crying. There's no sob or any sound that indicates that he is crying… but the droplets of tears kept on flowing… descending from his eyes. Its as if his eyes are a river.
He raised his hand to wipe it away, but close it into a fist and brought his hand down.
Pete need this to himself.
Pete needs to understand the concept of trust and betrayal.
He chose to ignore Pete in silence, for in silence he will find no rejection…
Because he knew that he is not the one Pete needs.
The movie ended yet Tin and Pete didn't move.
'Tin…'
Without saying a word, he gets up and both walks out of the cinema.
They were silent walking side by side.
At the parking lot, Tin starts the engine and drove away. It was a matter of 30 minutes before Pete look at the surrounding.
'Tin?' Pete asked when Tin stops in front of a luxury hotel.
'Would you like to spend the night here or at your apartment? Chances are, your Ai Thai Program is there at the door waiting for you. Or would you spend it alone to think and collect yourself?'
'I… I…'
'I think it is best to give yourself time to understand your feelings and what you want to do about it. Run from it? Avoid it? Face it.'
Pete didn't say anything for a while.
'I - I will spend the night here.'
Tin nodded and click the button to unlock the passenger door.
Pete descend outside, 'Tin…'
'Thank me another time. Right now what I want you to do is think about it carefully Pete. I can give you thousand of advice, but then the only person who can help you is you. You are the precious son of the Pitchayaworachote. Is he worth your tears?'
Pete was not able to answer because Tin pulls the passenger door to close and drives off.
Pete went inside the hotel and book a room for the night.
He enters to hotel room.
Unlike the hotel room in the International College - this room is spacious and the window is wide. You can see the radiant lights from the city below.
He didn't open the main lights except for the dim yellow lamp.
He walks towards the window and look at the sky once more.
The sky above dark, there's no stars, no moon… nothing to illuminate any brilliance… just like his heart.
He then saw his face reflected on the glass window.
He looks like a pale faced ghost.
There's no colour on his face.
His eyes looks bloodshot with all the tears that flows.
He touches the glass window and wipes the tears that descend from his eyes from there. The only one who can comfort him is himself.
The pain inside was excruciating… it was if someone break a glass into a thousand pieces and pierced his heart.
Is this it?
Is this what love can do to you?
Love can save you… He knew that love is something beautiful… No matter what gender or whom you love, its not something wrong…. But love… it can destroy you or save you…
He sat down beside the window and let the tears flow once more…
It is never ending.
The pain is like a torture.
He fell asleep crying and seating beside the glass window…
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Pete was so distraught to notice everything around him. And Tin just doesn't give a damn to anything that surrounds him.
From the time Pete and Tin steps inside the mall, both are not aware about P'Money and the others that were there. P'Money knew that two Prince are close but not this close to go to the cinema together.
P'Money took this chance to take a photo and send it to his Group Chat: 'Tops & Bottoms'
Money Honey Sexy : Look who I caught?
The image was of Tin and Pete entering Power Mac store, the fifth store the two entered.
Too Hot To Handle : WTF?! Why they 2gether?!
Sexy Neko : OMG! This is not TRUE! Did that fckn IcePrince deceived our PRINCE?!
Catcher Balls : This is BIG!
And that's not the only photo that P'Money sent her group chat.
The following photo:
Tin and Pete eating together at the nicest most romantic spot on the restaurant.
Tin and Pete entering a cinema together watching: Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans (1927)
Tin and Pete entering the parking lot.
The photos then circulate not just on P'Money's group chat but on other as well. That night, the photos was forwarded via LINE to most of the International College students who knew Tin and Pete, and most heart breaks soon follows as their beloved Prince was snatch slash deceives by the Demon Ice Prince.
The next day, Saturday by morning, the photos then was leaked to the Liberal Arts Department where many are a fan of Pete and though they detest Tin, they cant help but love his handsome face.
By afternoon, the photos slips into the handphones of the students from the Lab School from College of Education. Much to the delight of Lemon or Lay to her friends as she is known to be the Captain of many real male students and ships them as she fits. She then hurriedly show it to her friend Champoo who gasped.
That same time, the Engineering students was able to get that photo via tweeter this time. Pond upon seeing the photo drops his mobile with utter shock, he then cursed to hell and Ae cause that's a 6 month old phone. His mother will kill him. Ping and Bow looks at Pond who shook his head and told them to delete it - they MUST DELETE IT. It would be hell.
By midafternoon, the photos circulated among the Sports Science students - the boys of the football team then had a meeting minus Techno who seems to have no idea of what's happening. The meeting: 'Don't dare show the photo to the mad dog slash Beast King.'
But Can being Can, the most loyal and innocently stupid hurries to Ae and asked Ae what's happening while showing him the photos.
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Pete woke up from several knocks on the door.
He felt his body ache as he fall asleep on the floor.
The knock continues and he grimaced seeing that he slept not only on the floor but with his uniform without washing or cleaning… but then he laugh wryly. Would he even feel like cleaning last night?
He opens the door slowly and a pretty woman in hotel uniform gave a wai which he returns and told him, 'Good afternoon Sir Pitchaya. I was informed by the manager to give this personally to you.' The woman handed him an envelope and bows goodbye.
Pete opens the envelope finding his car keys and a letter from Tin.
You might not remember but I asked for your car keys last night, you gave it to me without question. Ai Pete, take a hold of yourself. If I were a thief, I believe I have stolen everything from you, even your body. Your car is at the hotel parking. Take care and think. Tin.
He smiles even though the pain inside of him still lingers… will it even subside?
He looks at his phone and tried to open it but seeing that the battery is totally empty, he leave it just like that.
Pete went to bed and hugs the soft pillow.
It's now afternoon... He cried himself to sleep and the ache is still there.
When will the pain go away?
'My dear little Pete. Remember this sweetheart, loving someone is a beautiful thing. It gives you hope and courage… it makes you so brave and can do so many things... and that love you feel is amazing… But you have to be careful to whom you give your heart because when you give your heart to someone, you're not only giving that person the right to love you but also the power to hurt you…'
He remembers the words of his mother.
The hurt he is feeling is nothing compared to anything he had felt. Even the damage and hurt by P'Trump wouldn't compete.
'Should I call N'Champoo to help me?!'
The words still lingers…
It still hurts him.
He closes his eyes and let his heart bleed for the nth time.
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He opens his eyes and everything is darkness except the lights from the outside city.
Ahhh ~ its night time again.
'I fell asleep crying again…'
He moves slowly and he felt an ache not on his heart but on his stomach.
He chuckled ironically, 'Even if I feel like dying, my body needs to eat.'
He gets up and open the main lights, he check his phone, once again remembering its dead he looks at the wall clock, 7pm.
He hardly ate anything last night and for the whole day he didn't eat anything.
He went to the fridge and opens it, it has several stacks of chocolates, water, sodas, nuts and five sandwiches.
He took out a water bottle and a ham and egg sandwich. He microwaves the sandwich and slowly tried to eat. His body is hungry, but he felt that every chew he makes he wants to vomit, but he gulped it down.
He doesn't want to worry his mother. He cannot afford to be sick and be pampered like a baby.
He went into this relationship as an adult and he had to face it like an adult.
After finishing his small meal, he went out and check himself out.
He went to the basement and went inside his car, he started the engine and located his phone charger and charge his phone.
He was not even 5 minutes away from the hotel when his phone then rings non-stop indicating several messages and the ring suggesting that he also receives voice messages.
He turn his car to the side and click the hazard button.
He opens his phone and was shocked with all the messages.
5 text messages from Pond and Chaaim.
Pond: Ai Pete. Where are you?
Pond: Are you okay?
Pond: Uhm, Ai Pete. Ai Shorty is looking for you. Can you please send me a message to where are you right now.
Chaaim: Ai Pete. Are you okay?
Chaaim: Ai Pete. Please reply to my message. Thank you.
2 voice message from Pond.
Pond: Ai Pete! Yo. Uhm. Where are you? I don't know if you were able to receive my text messages but - can you please reply to them. Or better call Ai Shorty.
Pond: Ai Pete. Please call him. You need to talk to Ae. I cannot even go near him. He's like a walking time bomb!
4 text messages from P'Money.
P'Money: Where are you?
P'Money: Who are you having dinner with?
P'Money: Are you currently at IconSiam?
P'Money: What's going on between you and the Demon Ice prince?
But what startled him was the several messages and voice messages from Ae.
30 messages from Ae.
50 missed calls from Ae.
10 voice messages from Ae.
Ae: Pete where are you?
Ae: I'm sorry Pete. Please. Please can you reply.
Ae: Pete please answer your phone please. Dont block me. Please.
Ae: Pete… I have your bag. Its safe here with me. Where are you?
Ae: I'm so sorry Pete. Please let's talk.
Ae: The hell Pete! Answer your phone!
Ae: Are you with that IC bastard?!
Ae: What the fuck Pete! At least give me a chance to explain!
Ae: Koon Chai… I'm waiting beside your car.
Ae: Koon Chai… where are you? I'm worried about you.
Ae: Pete… its 10pm now. Please send me a message. Where are you? I'm really worried about you.
Ae: Pete. Where are you? Please tell me where are you?
Ae: Pete please talk to me.
Ae: Pete. I want to see you. I know its Saturday and you don't have class. I see that you took your car. What time did you take it? I was there beside your car until 2am. If Pond didnt force me to go back to the dorm we could have talk.
Ae: Please Pete dont get your car in mid morning. Its dangerous for you to walk out here alone.
Ae: Are you okay? Please message me. I can't breathe not knowing what's happening to you.
Ae: Koon Chai. Have you eaten?
Ae: Please Pete. Dont block me.
Ae: WHAT THE FUCK PETE?! WHY THE HELL ARE YOUR WITH THAT IC BASTARD?!
Ae: IS THIS YOUR ANSWER?!
Ae: DAMMIT PETE! TALK TO ME!
Ae: STOP SULKING! TALK TO ME!
Ae: ARE YOU GOING TO REPLACE ME WITH THAT IC BASTARD?!
Ae: FINE.
Ae: GO AHEAD. IF THAT'S YOUR ANSWER I WILL NEVER FORCE YOU.
Ae: I HAVE NEVER FORCED YOU.
Ae: THANKS FOR EVERYTHING.
Ae: Ai Pete. I'm sorry. Sorry. That was my emotion talking. I saw you and the IC bastard on a date last night. I got the photo from Can's. Please let's talk. I have no bloody idea what's going on but please talk to me.
Ae: Pete. I am not going to give you to anyone. You're mine and I'm yours.
Ae: Pete. I'll never let you go.
Ae: Koon Chai. I'm sorry. Please talk to me.
Pete was crying the whole time he was reading and listening to Ae's messages. Everything inside his heart is a mess, he dont know what to feel first… was it worry, happiness, joy, sadness, pain, hurt or what?
There's a turbulent of emotions inside of him.
He inhaled and exhaled.
He doesn't know about the photos and what are those but one thing is for sure. He needs to talk to Ae. He had no idea that a one day silence from him will turn into this mess. He just needed time to think and be alone. If his going to talk to Ae, then he needs to say what's on his heart.
But first, he needs to shower and change his clothes.
Suddenly, all of a sudden he felt himself dirty for not washing himself. If he is going to face Ae, he wants to be presentable, not looking like crap. He doesn't want Ae to see him looking distraught.
He typed a reply.
'Ae. Let's talk. I'm about to go to my apartment. I'll be there in an hour.'
His phone rings immediately.
'See you.'
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He parks his car on the basement of the building and went to the elevator.
When the elevator opens in a hurried steps he walks toward his apartment door only to be surprised.
'Ae!'
'Pete.'
Ae was there standing on his door wearing his school uniform.
He slowly approach Ae and was shocked to what he saw.
Ae looks like… crap… like him.
His hair is unkept, his uniform is a mess, his eyes are red and his face looks haggard.
Ae steps aside when he approach giving him space to open the door.
Pete opens the door to let Ae come in and when he close the door, Ae pulls him into his embrace.
'Ae!'
'Pete! I'm sorry. Please give me a chance to explain. I'm so sorry Pete.'
'Ae…'
Ae turns him around and he was shocked seeing Ae in tears... crying.
'Pete… I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for being such a jerk to you. You don't deserve that. Please listen to me… I don't want to be a loser in front of you. I don't know why I was being like this. Before I met you, I always admit when I don't know something. I wouldn't care what they call me or tease me… but after we met, I don't want you to see my weakness, I don't want you to think I'm a lesser man… I don't want to be a disappointment to you… I always want to be the best for you. I want you to look at me as the best man in your life.'
'Ae…'
'Please Pete. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for mentioning her name. I was an asshole.'
'W-why did you mention her name?'
Ae put his right hand on Pete's neck, bringing his head down to Ae's.
'Because I was an asshole. I want you to shut up. That's the only name I know that will shut you up.'
'Is that the only reason?'
'Pete if you're going to imply that I have feelings for the girl, then stop. What I feel for you is not something you should think lightly. You are worth more than a hundred girls. You are the only one I will spend my whole life waiting. Please Pete, believe me. Give me this one chance to prove to you that I will never hurt you ever. Please. I'm sorry na… Please forgive Ae...'
'Ae… why do you think you are a loser to me? For me, you are the best and amazing man. I never once think that you are lesser of a man just because you are having a hard time in one or two subjects.'
'Pete…'
'Ae… One, two or three subjects doesn't define a man. I like you for who you are. Your friends may tease you dark, small or harsh looking, but I never see that. What I see is a man so cool and handsome, a man so kind that he will help any stranger, a man with a big heart that will accept a gay guy like me… and like me for what and who I am.'
Pete raise his hand and with his index finger gently wipes Ae's tears. 'I like Ae. No matter what or who you are. Ae is Ae.'
'Koon Chai…'
Ae raise his right hand and caress Pete's cheek… Ae was so relieve that his whole body slump against Pete.
'Pete… please don't ever block me again.'
'I-I didn't block you. My phone died.'
Ae looks at Pete's eyes. It is the same with him. Eyes that are red, full of tears.
Ahhh ~ the face that he so wanted to see.
The face that gives him strength and courage.
Pete smiles at him and bite his lips, showing once again that even though they have seen each other naked, Pete will always be Pete. Shy and adorably cute.
Ae holds Pete's hand and they walk towards the sofa.
Ae seats and when Pete was about to seat down beside him, Ae holds his hips and pull him on top of him.
'Ae!' Pete now sits straddling him. Ae grins devilishly when Pete blushes shades of red.
There's one more thing they have to settle.
'Pete. I only and will only believe in you. Tell me. Why are you with that IC bastard?'
'Ah… Tin…'
'I don't care about his name. Tell me.'
Ae's grip on Pete's hips is strong. Ae needed to know and he needed to see Pete's expression. He will not let the later escape him.
He admits he was the biggest asshole in the universe for mentioning her name just to shut Pete up. He doesn't have any reason for it. It's just a name he pick that will shut Pete up. Maybe it's also his pride talking.
There are several reasons why he doesn't want Pete to teach him.
Some are perverted cause he have no fucking idea how he can calm down if Pete in close proximity teach him at the library and he'll have to hide his raging boner. Koon Chai doesn't have a bloody idea how good he smells. Hell, Pete even sweating smells so damn good. Pete have no idea what his mannerism and gesture did to him. Pete will flick his hair, bite his lips, nod to the side - hell - every gesture indicates a sexiness that he has a hard time removing from his mind and to concentrate on his reviewers.
Second, he doesn't want to disappoint Pete if he fails the exams. He grew up as a traditional Thai, give him history, math, calculus, analytics anything with no english he can handle. But english subjects is the hardest for him. He barely got out alive from the last exam. If Pete taught him and he failed - what face can he shows his faen?
Third, his pride wouldn't let him. Pete is already having a hard time with so many subjects the International College has in their curriculum, hell, Pete even have to attend several seminars and events and most of the time they don't meet, Pete is with his classmates for a group projects. Asking for Pete's help would make him a loser. He doesn't want his faen to be bothered and add more to his problems.
When he told Pete about asking Champoo for help, he wanted to kick himself a thousand times when he saw the hurt in his face. It's as if he had slap the very thing he swore he would protect.
He felt a whole lot a loser to what he did.
He doesn't have any right to hurt Pete. Pete only wanted to help him and his own stupid short tempered mouth get the better of him.
Pond came back with Chaaim and when Pond asked where Pete was and Pond being a nosy bastard he told him about his blunter which earned him 'Ai Stupid Dick! Of all the! Ai Ae! You moron!'
Yes! He is. Big time!
And when he tried to get up and find Pete, Pond told him to give some time. If he so much run to Pete and shake him to listen to him, it would be worst.
So he gave time. Even though he wanted to tear the place down when Pete keeps on ignoring his messages. Not even reading it.
But what the fuck is the IC bastard saying about Pete and how dare he says Pete's real name.
He storms out of the library and waited beside Pete's car. That's the only place he knew Pete would return to. And when he saw the car still park, he let out a sigh of relief.
But then 7, 8, 9 and 10pm passed. His heart turned cold. He was afraid something happen to Pete. Or Pete left the car there cause he knew that he would be there waiting.
He waited for more… If Pond didn't get back with his bicycle he would have been the mosquitoes dinner and mid morning breakfast.
He was a mess when Pete wouldn't read nor answer his call.
He was worried sick. He doesn't feel like eating nor sleeping. He was able to close his eyes but the moment he opens them he look at his phone and when no messages from Pete not even reading his messages he was worried sick and yes, without changing his clothes he went to the parking lot. He gave a sigh of relief when the car is not there anymore - meaning… Pete went and took it. He is safe.
But then again - he was there beside the Benz until 2am - did Pete came and waited for him to go before he took it? Or did Pete came back mid morning?
He have no idea and begun worrying again.
P'No sent a text message for a practice. He doesn't want to practice but run to Pete's apartment to talk to him, but that would be invading Pete's privacy. He will never force Pete nor put Pete into a situation where he feel he is forced.
He sent a message again.
He was walking towards the locker room when one or two players looks at him and scattered away as if scared.
The hell? Does he look that bad? He knew he wasn't able to take a bath and planning on taking a shower at the locker room but he doesn't smell that bad. Hell, they are all boys who are full of sweat. He knew that he has a frown plastered on his face but why should they scatter as if his some kind of a demon?
When he entered the locker room there was a sudden tension and all didn't look at him, he wanted to ask P'Type and P'Champ but the two suddenly talk to themselves as if they have discovered a new way to win the game. He wanted to ask what the fuck is going on why are they looking at him as if scared.
It was Can who cleared it.
'Ai Ae! Why the hell is Ai Pete on a date with that motherfucker bastard?!'
Can all but shoved his phone to his face and what he saw lost his mind.
He snatch the phone from Can's hand and look at the photos. There are several photos of Pete and that IC Bastard.
'OI! That's my phone!'
Can shouted near his ears and snatch it back from him when he was about to throw it on the floor.
He slams his hand on the wall and turns around, not minding what P'No's shouting.
He pedals faster and went to his dorm. He punches the wall when Pete wouldn't answer his phone. He then texted Pete with all the dangerous emotion he is feeling.
He cried.
Yes. Like a lost child he cried.
He feel so much a wreck. In his 18 years of life, this is the first time that he felt the suffocating feeling of lost and not knowing what to do.
All his life, he knew what he wanted and if he can attain it, he will strive hard to make it and get it. He is a straightforward man. He doesn't dwindle. If he is bad at it, he will work hard for it. Nothing in this world can be attained without hard work.
But what can he do? Right now he felt so much worst, like the world - his world is coming to an end.
Pete… the only person who shines like the sun and who looks at him with so much love wouldn't talk to him. Wouldn't read his messages. Wouldn't even answer him.
The pain inside of him, did he do this to Pete?
He gets up and type a new message.
Ai Pete. I'm sorry. Sorry. That was my emotion talking. I saw you and the IC bastard on a date last night. I got the photo from Can's. Please let's talk. I have no bloody idea what's going on but please talk to me.
The pain his feeling, is it the same amount as Pete? If yes then he will do everything for Pete to forgive him. He doesn't care about the photos. Flashes of the photo appear in his mind - Pete was there standing looking dejected. As if the world close on him.
It's his fault.
Everything is his fault. His stupid pride and his stupid reasons.
Pete doesn't deserve to be treated that way.
He was losing his mind with worry and feeling of hurt that when his phone ring for a message, he gets up and when he saw the message was from Pete, he immediately came alive.
Koon Chai: Ae. Let's talk. I'm about to go to my apartment. I'll be there in an hour.
His Koon Chai is okay. A thousand feelings of relief came over him knowing that Pete is okay and not hurt, not in danger.
He replied right away 'See you.' And without changing his clothes or anything he went out, took a bus and arrive at Pete's apartment door less than 20 minutes. The concierge already knew him so there wasn't any problem going inside the building.
Pete said that he will be there in an hour. His heart is thundering with so much emotion. He felt cold and was nervous. He walks back and forth in front of the apartment door and every ting of the elevator he looks up and see if someone will walk towards his direction. After 25 minutes of waiting he hears a hurried footsteps.
'Ae!'
'Pete.'
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.
.
'Pete… please tell me… why are you with that IC bastard?'
Pete looks at him in the eyes and tell him what happen… how Tin was there and acted as a friend. How Tin gave him time and space to think and breathe and cry and just being there without asking any questions.
He felt himself so small - Pete would never need the IC bastard if only he wasn't a bastard himself.
But a little gratitude he felt for the IC bastard as he was with Pete and not anyone he didn't know. Pete is safe and not in danger.
He felt his heart break into a thousand glass when Pete was telling him what happen and his eyes are now watering with tears.
'Koon Chai… please don't cry anymore.'
'Ae. Tin is just a friend. I have never feel anything for him but as of a friend. Ae, I will never cheat on you. I only like Ae... so please... don't shut me up like that. It hurts.'
'Oh baby. I'm so sorry... never. I will never do that to you. And I know Koon Chai… I know… And I too Pete. I have never look nor feel anything to anyone. I have not entered this relationship thinking it would break. I will never let you go Pete. I like you more than you might know. I will never cheat on you Pete. I can never do that. I doubt I will even look at anything but you.'
'Ae…'
'Pete. You hold my heart in your hand.'
Pete let out a cute sniff and hugs him, hiding his blushing face to his neck. He smiles and caress Pete's back.
Home.
Yes.
Pete is home.
No one can ever replace Pete in his heart.
With Pete he found his home… a place where he - Intouch - belongs.
'I miss you Koon Chai…'
'Ae…'
'Can I kiss you?'
'I told you. You don't have to ask me. I can never say no to you…'
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Outside the apartment of Pete a car was parked at the side.
Tin taps his finger at the steering wheel.
He went there to check on Pete when the manager of the hotel calls him to inform that Pete check out of the hotel. Pete didn't know that when he check-in, he followed him and because he is known to the manager of the hotel, they gave permission to him. He asked them to send him a message when Pete will check-out.
He stays for a little while waiting for the message from his men.
It seems that the Ai Thai Program is not going anywhere and was waiting for Pete by his car. He went home and told his men to only take Pete's car when the Ai Thai Program is nowhere in site.
He receives a text message around 2.30am and was impressed. His men told him that Ai Thai Program didn't leave the spot until 2am if it weren't for someone in bike forcing him to go home.
They got Pete's car and he told his men to give the keys back to him.
Around 8am he went to the hotel and informs the manager to give the envelope with Pete's car keys to him around noon.
When he receives the message of Pete checking out he went out of his house to see if Pete needs something. He is still worried about him.
He was about to get out of his car when Ai Thai Program came running and went inside the apartment.
He then went back inside his car.
After 20 minutes, he saw Pete's car.
'Hmmm…'
And this is him right now.
Seating in his car… thinking… 'What if… I stop you Pete. What if… I force you… What if… I clouded your head with doubt… would you be mine?'
He laughs softly knowing the answer.
No.
Pete is different.
Pete may see himself weak and not brave, but for him, Pete is the bravest and most strong. He has the strength to face himself and his sexuality. He is brave enough to risk his feelings to another boy.
Pete is not someone who will be forced into anything. Pete may be timid but he is not stupid. He will not be clouded by words from others.
He doesn't stand a chance against Ai Thai Program.
He smiles and start his car.
He needs to go home or not, he needs to check his car to the maintenance for a while ago, an annoying monkey throws a soccer ball on his window.
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Thank you for reading.
I was planning on adding a second bathroom scene (after all, both haven't taken a decent bath) - but I'll let it go for now.
I hope you enjoy the story.
Sometimes, all you need to say is sorry. Communicate with what's inside of you. It will clear a lot of misunderstandings and will strengthen the relationship more.
Please forgive any grammatical error, typo error or any ERROR at all. English is not my natural language.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of LOVE BY CHANCE.
All rights belong solely to the author MAME and the Director New Siwaj
And neither do I make any money from this story.
Any resemblance to any real people (living, dead, or stolen by fairies), or to any real animals, gods, witches, countries, and events (magical or otherwise) is just blind luck, or so I hope.