"You know, these three times you managed to catch me, you did it using my feelings against me"
Peter looked at Neal sharply, instantly on defensive.
"Neal, you know that..." Peter started, somehow making it sound like the beginning of a lecture.
You know that you were the one who committed the crimes. It was well within my rights to use anything I could to catch you and arrest you.
Surprisingly, Neal instantly put his hand up, as if to stop him, and chuckled softly.
"Relax, Peter. I am just making an observation" his friend answered, his tone all matter-of-fact, the corners of his mouth moving slightly upwards, "You know, it is admirable, in a way. This rare moment of self-awareness you had"
"Self-awareness?" Peter asked warily, feeling that he may not like the answer. Neal's tone was teasing though, and two could play this game.
"Well, you weren't smart enough...", Neal started slowly, just to hear Peter interrupting him abruptly.
"Me?! YOU were the one who got caught."
Neal just chuckled again, placing his glass of wine back on the table.
"Let me finish, ok? You weren't smart enough to figure out a trap that I wouldn't notice, so you figured out something that I would notice and walk into anyway. That's smart. A fair game"
Peter just snorted.
"Why are we even talking about it now? And why... Three times?"
"Cape Verde" Neal answered simply.
"But... Ah"
The realization dawned on him.
"Ellen's pager. Not something you could ignore, just as much as you couldn't ignore the fake intel about Kate".
"Ellen wasn't the only person I couldn't ignore, Peter. You really thought I could just hang up the moment I heard your voice?"
To that, Peter didn't know how to react. It's not that it surprised him, he knew that Neal cared about him and wouldn't pass up on the opportunity to say goodbye. Get some closure. Still, hearing Neal confirm, his voice soft and sincere…
Even after all these years, it made Peter feel things he didn't know how to sort out.
"Ok, but why are you bringing it up now?", he asked, instead.
Instead of answering right away, Neal took another sip of his wine. One that felt deliberately slow. It was only after a moment, when Neal reached the pocket in his suit jacket and fished something out of it.
A burner phone.
"I thought it would be good for us to have a way... To communicate" Neal started, sounding... almost hesitant? Vulnerable?
He looked in Peter's direction, but he didn't really meet his eyes.
"Something quick, in case of some emergency, you know? If there are life-threatening situations and my knowlegde and expertise could come in handy... If you need some info about street contacts, opening difficult locks, safe-cracking, world of art, you name it. If you need... " Neal hesitated again, apparently knowing that Peter wouldn't like this one "If you need money", stolen money, "or if you just want to talk about something and you feel like I may be the right guy for it. Just please, don't ask me how to hotwire a Lamborghini again", Neal finished with a short chuckle.
Of course, it's been years, but he wouldn't let this one go.
Peter was quiet. Neal took one more sip of his wine, putting the burner on the table, closer to Peter, but not exactly right in front of him.
Only after a moment, he continued.
"But only you know, if you want to. If you don't, just toss the phone to the river or whatever. I don't want to put you in a... difficult position"
Was he reading his mind?
And then, in a manner that felt much more self-assured, Neal added:
"Though I have to admit, I insist that you take it. It's untraceable and it has only two numbers programmed, speed dial one is me, speed dial two is Moz"
Peter reached for the phone slowly, stunned.
Moz, even he...
That made it even more shocking.
Because Peter understood all too well what Neal was trying to say here.
I am perfectly aware that you may want to use it as a trap.
I trust you not to. I trust you won't play with my feeling like that.
But know that, if you do... I will still walk into this trap willingly, because I would do anything to help you. Especially if your life is in danger.
But if you use it as a trap, I won't even hold this against you. I never have.
And then, the trickiest part.
Because if Peter took the phone and then any information on Neal's criminal activities showed on his radar, it would be a no-win situation for him.
He would be in a possession of a perfect weapon against a wanted felon. Something he was obliged to share with the rest of law enforcement.
Not using the burner to catch Neal would mean his integrity as an FBI agent falling apart. It would mean letting a criminal walk.
(Neal may not have been the worst of the worst, but it doesn't mean he didn't cause damage.)
Using it would be betraying a friend and getting him locked up for the mere fact that he was willing to risk everything to help him, of all people. Meaning, the integrity that would fall apart would be the one of a friend and a decent human being.
(Sometimes, Peter thought that he didn't really know what being decent meant anymore.
Sometimes it felt like it wasn't about general rules anymore. Rules were about deciding once, and Peter felt like he was making choices all the time)
Peter stared at the burner, pondering all his options. Minutes passed and Neal looked at him expectantly, giving him time to make the decision. Calm, quiet. Probably perfectly aware of what was going on on agent's mind. Of the dilemma he faced.
(Always so perceptive. Always knowing Peter TOO well.)
Only after a few minutes, Neal continued, quietly, yet confidently.
"I am serious, Peter. Call me and... If the situation calls for it, I am taking my first flight to New York, the consequences be damned".
Yeah, Neal knew all the risks. Neal knew all the risks and for his friends, he was still willing to take them. Peter could blame it on his bad impulse control and his teenager-on-hormones behaviour, but by now, he knew better than that. Neal actually thought it over well, and even if he didn't, nothing could change his decision. He was willing to risk a lot for his friends and Peter was one of them.
Which meant, Peter could make only one decision here. The phone was supposed to be for emergency situations only. It was a compromise, but one that Peter was willing to take.
"No, you won't" he said, after a moment, his tone serious, which now was nothing more than part of the charade they've been playing since day one.
"You won't catch the first flight, Neal"
He didn't have to look at Neal to know that it was the young man's turn to look stunned. Good.
Peter laughed, his expression changing. All the seriousness and thoughtfulness replaced with a grin.
"You won't have to catch any flight to New York, my friend. You own a private jet these days".