Though it was getting late, Penelope was still waiting to hear from one of her teams. It was odd that she hadn't heard from them, they should have touched down on the tarmac by now. A sudden knocking on her door caused her to jump and she called out in a strangled voice, "Come in, the door's open!"
The door opened, and silence greeted Penelope. Turning in her chair, she saw Section Chief Strauss staring at her. "Do you need anything, Ma'am?" she asked, turning back to her computer screens. Once more, silence greeted her and she looked back at Strauss, noticing this time the red-rimmed, puffy eyes and air of sorrow about the woman. "What's wrong?" she asked as she stood and took a step towards the other woman.
"You, you probably want to be sitting down for this news, Ms. Garcia," she stammered out, not looking at Penelope. They sat on the couch and Strauss primly clasped her hands in her lap.
"Will you please tell me what's going on?" Penelope could feel the panic building in her chest and she hugged herself to keep it in.
Erin looked into her eyes and the sorrow Penelope saw there caused her to gasp aloud. "We haven't heard from the team in two hours. They've gone off radar and are presumed lost. I'm so sorry, Penelope." All pretense of aloofness disappeared as she burst into tears. Penelope began sobbing as well and fell into Erin's open arms.
"Not even Morgan?" she choked out, burying her head in Erin's neck.
"No. There's been no contact with any of them." Penelope felt the other woman rub her back gently and she clung to her all the more, desperate for a comforting touch. Her sobs showed no signs of ceasing and still Erin held her, stroking her hair softly.
"Shh, Penelope, try to gather control back. You're going to make yourself sick," she whispered, kissing her temple.
Penelope drew in a shuddery breath and swiped at her eyes. "I-I can't believe…" She trailed off, struggling to keep control over her emotions. "I want to go home. Maybe, maybe one of them have called there."
"I'll take you. You're in no condition to drive." She helped Penelope up and Penelope curled an arm around her waist, unwilling to let go of Erin Opening her drawer, she pulled out her purse, slinging it over her shoulder. Together, they entered the bullpen and Penelope felt every eye on her as they slowly descended the stairs. She tried to ignore them, ignore the pity in their eyes, but felt her shoulders start to shake once more.
Finally, they were in the parking garage and Erin was opening her car door for her. Penelope climbed in and buckled up, giving lackluster responses to Erin's gentle probes on directions. Once at her apartment, Erin parked on the street and followed her up. "I'm home now. I'll be fine."
"At least let me make you a pot of tea," she responded and Penelope nodded. Like a wraith, she moved over to her phone and saw she had a message. Without thinking, she pressed the button and heard Morgan's voice drift out from the machine.
"Hey, Baby Girl. I guess, by now, they'll have declared us missing. I only have a few minutes; I want to spend them with you in spirit. Oh god, Baby Girl, I'm so sorry to be leaving you like this. I hope the pilot can land the plane, but I'm not holding out much hope. You're my best friend, Penelope, and I love you. Never forget that. Ah, my sweet solace, I wish I could give you happy words as my last, but I can't find them in me right now. Reid was right, I should have settled down with you, had a family, left a legacy. Penelope…" His voice became garbled by static and she couldn't make out anything else he said. A coldness seeped out from her core and she wrapped her arms around herself to try to warm up.
Feeling Erin next to her, she turned and stared at her bleakly. "I need to feel something, anything, right now," she whispered as she leaned forward and kissed the other woman. Penelope felt her stiffen in shock and buried a hand in her hair to keep her from pulling away. Finally, Erin surrendered to the kiss, melting into Penelope's arms.
"We shouldn't be doing this. I'm your boss, Penelope, and you're in a very vulnerable place right now. It wouldn't be right if I –" Penelope cut her words off, kissing her hungrily.
"I don't care," Penelope said against her lips, bringing her hands down to fumble with the buttons on Erin's shirt. Once she got it open, she trailed kisses down Erin's neck, maneuvering her over to the bed. Penelope pulled her down with her, sucking on the pulse point of Erin's neck. Hurriedly, Penelope unclasped Erin's bra, pulling it from her body before making short work of her own dress and bra.
The feel of Erin's soft body against her own caused her to tear up once more. She wrapped her arms around Erin's waist and pulled her closer, trying to lose herself in the other woman. She heard Erin sigh and then felt her lips once more on her forehead. "Oh, Penelope. Are you certain you want this?"
Penelope deliberately nodded and lifted her lips for a kiss. She tasted salt on Erin's lips and hesitantly lick at the evidence of Erin's tears. Her lips parted and Penelope felt her tongue touch hers. Moaning slightly, she felt Erin nip delicately at her tongue before kissing down her neck and chest. She bit her lip as Erin drew one nipple into her mouth, suckling strongly. Wanting to do something with her hands, Penelope felt along the waistband of Erin's skirt, seeking the zipper. Slowly, she pulled the tab down, then slipped her hands under the skirt to cup Erin's ass. She released her nipple and began to kiss down Penelope's body, stopping just above her panty line to take a deep breath, hooking her thumbs in the elastic to pull them down.
Erin ran her fingers along Penelope's folds and she felt her hips move restlessly, opening for the other woman easily. "Please, Erin," she whimpered, guiding her fingers to her core. Erin's thumb brushed against her clit and Penelope orgasmed, muffling her scream with her other hand. She pulled Erin up flush against her, kissing her once more. "Please, don't leave me." Penelope rested her forehead against Erin's as she closed her eyes. "I couldn't bear it if you left me, too."
"I won't leave you tonight, I promise." Penelope snuggled into Erin's open arms, her heart still frozen in her chest. Hot tears coursed down her cheeks and she felt Erin wipe them away, then pull her closer, wrapping her arms around her waist. "What am I going to do with you, Penelope?"
"Keep me safe," she murmured as she fell asleep, the demons at bay for the moment.
In the morning, she woke up, warmth filling her being. Without opening her eyes, she turned into the source of the warmth. Running her hands along the curves next to her, her eyes suddenly snapped open, her mind catching up with reality. "Oh god, Erin, what have I done?" she asked as she sat up in bed, pulling the sheet to cover her blushing body.
Erin quickly masked the hurt look in her eyes as she sat up as well. "Nothing I didn't let happen to me. You needed comforting last night and I was more than glad to give it. I'll be leaving now." She made to get up, but Penelope stopped her, putting her hand on Erin's shoulder.
"Stay, please. You deserve so much better than this, than some random fuck in some random bed."
Erin shook her head as she laughed mirthlessly. "Tell that to my ex-husband."
"Oh, Sugar, if he didn't know that about you, he wasn't worth keeping. Kevin lost sight of that in me, and I lost him." Without thinking, she leaned forward and kissed Erin sweetly, her eyes filling with tears once more. "My life has been turned completely upside down in the last twelve hours, and you remain my only constant. And I know this is incredibly selfish of me, but I don't want you to leave me yet. Hold me?"
"Of course, Penelope," she answered, not looking at her as she opened her arms. Penelope laid her head on Erin's chest, listening to her heart beat as she ran her fingers through her hair. Penelope felt the tears fall down her face under the gentle touches she was receiving. Her husband must have been mad to give this sweet comfort up.
She must have fallen back asleep, because the next thing she knew was feeling Erin slip out of bed and the sound of water running. She got up out of bed and padded over to her dresser, pulling out a pair sweat pants and an oversized shirt. Once she was dressed, she made her way to the kitchen and started to cook a light meal for them. She heard footsteps behind her and whirled around to see Erin standing there, wearing one of her nightgowns.
"I hope you don't mind that I raided your dresser for something to wear. Have you called work yet?"
"No. I couldn't bear to talk to anyone there right now. Besides, you know where I am, that's good enough for me." Erin nodded and sat down at the table while Penelope served them. They ate in silence, Penelope forcing herself to eat, knowing she needed to keep her strength up. She could feel Erin's eyes on her occasionally and smiled at her, though it felt more like a grimace at times. Together, they did the dishes, then Penelope went into the living room, curling up on the sofa.
Erin joined her moments later and Penelope leaned into her, pulling her arm around her shoulders. "He loved me, Erin," she whispered as she splayed a hand out over her stomach. "More than as a friend and I never knew. I always figured I wasn't his type, you know. At first, our banter was the only thing keeping my broken heart at bay, but as I grew used to being his best friend, my heart moved on. Tell me, then, why does this hurt so much?"
She felt Erin kiss her temple once again and leaned into the touch. "It hurts because you still carried a torch, deep inside, for him, and it's just been doused forever. If I could wish them back, I would."
"I may have finally figured you out, Erin. You're like the Skinner to our Mulder and Scully. Now that Mulder is gone for good, you're going to pick up the pieces of Scully's broken heart and try to heal her. And this Scully wants that so very much. Stay with me tonight, again, please?"
Erin sighed and stilled her hand in Penelope's hair. "Yes, I will," she whispered after a few moments. Penelope looked up at her and saw she was crying again. She tried to bury the guilt she felt, knowing this time that she was the cause of her tears, choosing to snuggle close to Erin once more instead. Penelope felt her eyelids grow heavy and fought to stay awake, fearing Erin would run from her if she slept. It was a losing battle, though, and before she lost consciousness, she heard Erin say, "What am I doing to her? This is not who I am."
She was alone when she woke up. She looked around for Erin, finally finding her on the laptop, typing furiously. "Who are you writing?"
Erin looked up, blushing brightly. "My daughter, Kelly. She's at Ed's for the week and I forgot to call last night."
"Ah. Do you want to order something in? There's not much in my fridge."
"I'm not really that hungry. But if you want something, go ahead."
"That's fine, I just wanted to know if you wanted anything." Penelope got up and pulled out her current knitting project and began to stitch, keeping an eye on Erin as she did. The hours passed quietly, and then Erin was in front of her, holding out her hand, not looking at her. She took it, letting Erin help her up.
Penelope kissed her, wrapping her arms around her waist and pulling her close. She felt Erin sighed against her lips, stiffening slightly before she relaxed into her. Leaning back, she looked at Erin, who had her eyes closed, a poignant smile on her lips. Penelope sighed herself and let Erin pull her down on the bed. She ran her fingers through Erin's blonde hair and then pulled off her shirt, dropping it on the floor. Erin followed suit, taking off the nightgown and letting it fall.
Erin was crying again, broken sobs that tore at Penelope's heart. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out and then she was silenced by Erin's lips on hers. The perfunctoriness of the kiss galled Penelope and suddenly, she realized what she'd done to Erin. She was no better than the unsubs she tracked down. Wild sobs burst out of her and she pulled away from Erin's touch, curling into a ball on the very edge of her bed.
She flinched from Erin's light touch on her back. "How can you touch me after what I forced you to do? How can you stand to be so close to a monster?"
"You're not a monster, Penelope, you're grieving. And I meant what I said ealier. If I had not wanted this, it would never have happened." Penelope turned to face Erin, tears still coursing down her cheeks. "Besides, you're not the only one who lost someone close to them last night." She leaned forward and kissed Penelope lightly. "Shared sorrow is half sorrow."
Penelope kissed her back, hesitantly wrapping her arms around the older woman's waist. "I don't, I just, oh, how have I managed to fuck everything up in so short a time?"
Erin placed a finger on her lips, stilling the words that poured from them. "Shh, Penny." Penelope nodded and snuggled into the warmth Erin offered. She didn't know how, but somehow this usual bitch in heels had made her feel very safe in such a short time. And no one would ever believe what they had shared. They began kissing once more, the hesitancy gone.
Erin had just moved her hands up cup Penelope's breasts when both women heard the lock on the door turn. As one, they turned to watch the doorway. "Baby Girl, don't you ever watch the news? Or answer your phone for that matter?"
Penelope felt the blood drain from her face as she heard his voice and she unconsciously clung all the closer to Erin. "Derek?" she asked softly, not trusting her legs to hold her up if she moved. His footsteps came closer and closer, and the trepidation grew in her chest.
And then he was there, standing in her bedroom doorway, the smile on his face faltering as he saw she was in bed with someone else, with someone he despised. "What is that bitch doing in your bed? Is that how she knows everything about us? How long have you been fucking and telling, Garcia?" he spat out, anger radiating from him.
"Don't Sugar, it's not like –"
"Like what? The whore is in your bed, naked as the day is long! How could you do this to us, Garcia?" He turned on his heel and stalked from the apartment, slamming the door behind him.
"I should go. I've caused enough trouble tonight," Erin said lowly, her voice oddly hoarse. Penelope turned to look at her, taking in the tears unshed in her eyes and reached out to touch her.
"Erin, no. He made his choice and jumped to a conclusion without letting me explain. You're not a whore." Penelope kissed her forehead. "You are a comforter." She kissed her eyelids gently, and then her cheeks. "You cared when it mattered most." She kissed her lips, nipping lightly before she released them. "And you taste incredibly sweet. No one who tastes like you can be bad."
"Penelope," Erin moaned as she kissed down her neck, stopping to suck at the pulse point before moving lower. Penelope gently ran her thumb over Erin's nipple, watching the dusky flesh pucker. Erin squeaked slightly as Penelope sucked the bud into her mouth and Penelope giggled a bit at the sound. Her hand slipped down Erin's curves and she marveled in how Erin's body reacted to her.
As she dipped her hand between Erin's legs, she couldn't help but blurt out, "You're so hot and wet, Erin." Unerringly, Penelope's thumb found Erin's clit and she felt the other woman tighten around her fingers as she stroked the bundle of nerves.
"Oh god, Penelope!" she keened loudly as she raked her nails down Penelope's back, her orgasm bowing her body. Penelope fell heavily to her side, staring at Erin. "What?" she breathlessly asked.
"I don't know, it's just, you're so beautiful, and I'm, well, me."
With a tenderness she'd not thought the woman capable of, Erin stroked her face, smiling sadly. "You are beautiful, Penelope." Penelope ducked her head into Erin's hand, kissing the palm.
As she drifted off to sleep, her heart heavy over Derek's cruel words, she murmured, "Never let me go." All she heard in response was Erin's soft sigh.