A/N: I don't own Strawberry Panic.
Preface
I didn't really know love until Nagisa-chan broke my heart. And for that, I am thankful.
Tamao sighed, as she watched Nagisa and Shizuma from her window, walking hand and hand until there vanished from sight. But I'm not thankful for that.
Shizuma and Nagisa were everywhere, not literally, of course, but they seemed to be. Shizuma's picture stood on the desk by Nagisa's bed, always reminding Tamao who Nagisa truly belonged to, taunting Tamao with her hauntingly beautiful green eyes. Or in classes, whenever Nagisa-chan could not properly focus, she would get that distant, dreamy look in her eyes and Tamao knew it was Shizuma who roamed her day dreams. Even in between after classes, when the couple could be seen doing anything and everything in plain sight. Everyone was always gossiping about the passion in the couple, always giggling. Sometimes, Tamao thought they were snickering at her. But with gossip, you are never really sure what is what and who is who. Still, that was little comfort for the heartbroken Tamao.
But Tamao was not someone to focus on the cons of a sitution. With all her might, she tried to focus on the lucky outcomes of her heart break. She was stronger, that she was sure of. No one would ever break Tamao again, at least the way Nagisa did. The way Nagisa left her on the altar, that would be great pratice just in case she ever got left on her wedding day. And, Tamao had matured. When Nagisa-chan first enrolled in Miator, Tamao almost worshiped the ground that the redhead walked on. Tamao crushed on her in a way that was borderline stalker, recording her "cute" screams, measuring her body, calling her "my Nagisa". But that Tamao was gone. In her place was the new and inproved Tamao, who was all grown up and no longer obsessed over the ones she cared about. All she did was write poems of her beautiful long lost rainbow...who turned out to be only rain once the sun went away. Sure, she did still squeeze her eyes shut and wish-oh how she would wish-that Nagisa-chan would change her mind and come back to her, and sometimes, on lonely nights she would dream that Nagisa did. And that was normal (at least she thought it was). But the truth remained the same: Nagisa and Shizuma, and then there was Tamao. And it's better that way.
Although Tamao prayed that for Nagisa's love and affection, it was not as common as her other wish. Mostly for a new lover, someone to be her partner for the Etoile election and her faithful lover. Tamao wrote lovely, dazzling poems now of days describing her "sun" or her "butterfly" (the metaphor was different each time), and prayed for a special one to call her own. Once or Twice Tamao mused on what she would look like, but then decided it didn't matter. All she needed was for someone new to be the object of her affection, and to return her love. Someone to speed up the healing process.
The healing process took forever. Tamao expected it would help in three weeks when Shizuma finally graduated, but she herself tried to come up with her own methods. At first, she slept in other girls' rooms, politely avoiding both Shizuma and Nagisa, and distracting herself with novels. Tamao, always willing to ignore the rejection pains, even tore the page from her notebook where she first wrote the amazing poem of Nagisa, her "rainbow". It was still lost in the room, somewhere between the waste basket and the wall.
At last, when Tamao was finally done with her newest edition to her collection of Nagisa related poetry she set the notebook down on her nightstand. At last, the Nagisa collection is done.
Deep inside the feathery pages of Tamao-chans notebook, there was the best poem in the Nagisa collection. It took her sometime-two weeks-but it was worth it. Where tattered remains of the first poem was, the last poem was written in purple ink. And it would be one of the best poems Tamao-sama would ever write.
It was the poem of the rainbow's bittersweet closure.