"Lawrence Cudo . . . Cudo . . . Ah, here he is!"
Shinigami Grell Sutcliffe removed the human's book from the shelf and set it on the cart with the dozens of other ancient cinematic records scheduled to be relocated. Today was moving day, as it were. Records older than four hundred or so years were to be transferred into the deeper, dustier parts of the library where they were rarely touched upon again.
The crimson-haired reaper looked at the long list before searching the shelves once again. "Carlisle Cullen . . . Cullen . . . Cuseen?"
Grell read over the row of books again. No, there was no "Carlisle Cullen" here. The shinigami frowned and checked the list again.
"Hee heee . . . This is quite a predicament, hmmm?"
Grell squealed rather girlishly at the voice of the retired reaper. The Undertaker was looking through one of the ancient records on the cart.
The red-head reaper grimaced. "Did you forget to return that record, too? How . . . unpunctual."
The gray-haired reaper grinned at Grell, tapping his chin in thought with a long, black nail. "No . . . That name is unfamiliar. But this isn't the first time souls have been unaccounted for . . . heee . . ."
"Really? And you didn't bring this up before? Why haven't I heard of this?"
The Undertaker cackled to himself. "Well, you never asked!"
Grell groaned and hit himself in the forehead. If I don't figure this out, Will will scold me and burden poor me with more work!"Fine! Tell me some of the other names . . ."
x-x-x
Grim reapers Grell and Ronald Knox stood in front of a rather large mansion in a gloomy town called "Forks". The crimson-haired shinigami had written up a list of souls that hadn't been collected and three had led him to this dull area.
Ronald made a low whistle. "Impressive place. Not as big as some of the places back in the day, though. Who are we looking for? The 'Mullens' or somethin'?"
"Carlisle Cullen, Rosalie Hale, and Isabella Swan," Grell recited, "The three apparently reside somewhere around this hideous place."
"And you think they're still alive after all this time?"
"They must be! We wouldn't miss a soul for four hundred years! Besides, I've seen Cullen's name on the 'Internet' machine."
Ronald grinned. "That fancy new thing? Ahh, if only we had one of those two hundred years ago. We could've solved this back then."
"Yes, and contact with my Sebas-chan would've been a click away!" Grell squeaks, remembering those days. He sighs before returning his attention to the matter at hand. The red-haired reaper held up his modified death scythe - a chainsaw.
"Ready to claim these overdue souls?"
The orange and black-haired reaper gripped a lawnmower - his death scythe - and widened his grin. "Hell yes."
The two walked up the path to the dark mansion, waltzing right up to the door. Grell turned on his scythe and cut the door down. The shinigamis stepped through the smoke of the wreckage to find a family of . . .
. . . Well, Grell wasn't sure as to what they were. They definitely weren't human; nothing he had encountered before.
"Who are you?" growled a bronzed-haired teenager, who seemed to be protecting one of the women and a child.
"We are shinigamis of DEATH!" They did the trademark pose, just confusing (if not agitating) the odd group even more.
"We are looking for a few unclaimed souls," Grell explained, "We believe a 'Carlisle Cullen' lives here, yes?"
A middle-aged blond "human" stepped forward. "That would be me." His voice was calm, if not a tad friendly. "Is there something wrong, sir?"
"'Sir'?" the red-head reaper squealed, puffing up his cheeks in disgust. "I'll have you know that I'm a gorgeous-"
"Yes, you were supposedly born four hundred years ago," Ronald interjected, cutting off his ranting superior, "But you apparently haven't died yet. We would like an explanation, if you will."
The family seemed relatively shocked and put themselves even more on the defensive, ready to jump at any time. Carlisle remained calm, however.
"Well, you two seem to not be human yourselves so I suppose it wouldn't hurt. Me - and my family, for that matter - are immortal vampires."
"Vampires, hmmm?" Grell muttered. Well, they were quite pale and gorgeous (not as much as his Sebas-chan, of course). Yet, he had never met a real vampire before.
Knox seemed amused at the knowledge of a new species. "I see. Well, if you may, would you mind reading this list for any recognizable names?"
He handed over the long list. The vampire read it surprisingly quickly, handing it back a few moments later.
"Yes, well . . . Most of my family is on this list. Except for the child, Renesmee. I also recognize a few others, as well . . ."
Sutcliffe gazed at the child, almost longingly. She was so cute! "Who are her parents?"
"Edward and Bella. Yes, they are on this list as 'Edward Masen Jr.' and 'Isabella Swan'."
"Basically, she shouldn't exist," Ronald claimed, leaning on his lawnmower. The vampires seemed to take this as a threat, clearly ready to attack at any time.
"Technically, none of you should exist in this day and age," the crimson-haired reaper continued, "Your souls are overdue for collection."
"I suppose that means you're going to kill us," the blond vampire stated, seemingly only slightly unnerved.
"Yes, it does," Ronald confirmed, "Our apologies. The higher ups won't take any excuses for a missing person."
With that, the orange-haired shinigami revved his death scythe, lifted it, and cut right through Carlisle. Surprisingly, he didn't resist. As if he excepted his fate for cheating death. Blood flew everywhere, leaving the family of vampires mortified and even more enraged. A buff, dark-haired vampire leaped at the two at inhuman speeds. With a flick of the wrist, he ended up in the way of the mower's blades and was chopped into bloody pieces.
The duo's cinematic records emerged but they were payed no mind for the moment. A female and a male vampire jumped at the shinigamis. Grell took care of them with ease.
The two grim reapers took care of the rest of the family easily, the only survivor left being the half-vampire child, Renesmee. Ronald had stepped back to view the eight lives of the vampires, leaving Grell to take care of the last one.
"Shinigami of death . . . ?" the girl mumbled, seemingly a bit unused to using her voice.
"Yes, little vampire girl?" Might as well hear her out. What harm could she do?
She stared at him in the eyes, showing little traces of fear. "When we die . . . Where will we go? Is there a Heaven for us?"
The red-head reaper chuckled. "For humans? Yes. There's also a bleak Hell, as well. For you and your family? You'll just have to wait and see."
Renesmee nodded, calming slightly. "Thank you. You can dispose of me now."
Grell felt slightly unnerved by the serious tone of the young child. He thought about sparing her; to make her his own child. But he knew the other shinigami would not approve. The child probably wouldn't either, wanting to be with her family.
"Good-bye then, young girl."
Through the blood and the roar of the chainsaw, Grell watched the short life of a half-human, half-vampire girl.
x-x-x
"So, all these 'vampires' are gone, then?"
Grell nodded at his superior. William T. Spears studied the reaper in front of him, glancing at the list of missing souls.
"And these that aren't crossed off . . ."
"Were probably stolen by demons when they originally died."
Will shot Grell a questioning gaze. "And the 'werewolves' you discovered?"
The crimson-haired reaper shrugged, looking at his nails. "They'll still die when the time comes. They don't seem to be immortal."
William nods absently. "Very good. We always figured the demons stole the missing souls . . . The numbers here indicate most of them changed into vampires, however . . ."
"Soooo? Do I get anything special for solving this mystery?"
The black-haired grim reaper looked up, adjusting his glassing with his death scythe-clippers. Grell seemed to be anxious for a reward, squirming a bit.
He sighs. "Isn't my praise good enough?"
Grell pouted. "Can I go shopping with your praise? I don't think so!"
Another sigh. "If you say so. How about this then . . ."
x-x-x
Ronald walked by as Grell was typing away at his new computer. He gaped in envy.
"Lucky! Will gave you one of those fancy Internet-machines?"
"It's called a 'computer'," Grell stated matter-of-factly. "Yup, after figuring out the whole vampire conspiracy thing! Look, I even found Sebas-chan on this 'MSN' program~!"
Knox pouted as Grell squealed in delight. "Why didn't I get rewarded? You did tell him I helped too, right?"
"What? Oh, well, funny story about that . . ."
"That's not fair! I'm going to go ask for my damn reward!"
As Ronald ran off, Grell returned to the computer. "Well, Sebas-chan. Let's meet under the crimson moon, like old times~!"