Thanks for reviewing! Here is the next fic, I hope that you enjoy it and please review and tell me what you thought. Monica and Chandler broke up shortly after they started dating and he moved away. The song is called Back to You, by John Mayer.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the song.
Monica sat at her kitchen table and picked up the last of the RSVPs. The postmark said Chicago, and there was only one person that she knew lived in Chicago. She ripped it open and saw that it was from Chandler. He had checked that he would not be there. There was a note enclosed and she picked it up and began to read.
Dear Monica,
I'm so happy for you. I'm sure that you will make a beautiful bride, and I know that Pete is a very lucky man. I will not be able to be there, because it will hurt to see you marry someone else. But as I only wish you happiness, I hope that everything in your life goes the way that you've planned it. Send my love to the gang, and my apologizes for not be able to make it.
Chandler
Monica reread the letter before placing it on the table in front of her and sighing. She was getting married in a few months. To Pete. She loved Pete, she kept repeating to herself as a mantra. You love Pete. You love Pete. You're marrying Pete. She twisted the gorgeous ring around her finger and stared back down at the letter again. He wasn't coming. Was she happy? She missed him sure, but seeing him again would resurface feelings that she had safely hidden away. The kitchen door swung open and Pete came in. She was living with him of course, and he kissed her cheek.
"Is that the last of them?" He asked. She nodded silently wiping the tear that had made its way down her cheek. Pete did not notice this, Pete barely noticed anything. He kissed her again this time on the lips and pulled her up by her hand.
"That's the last of them," she told him again.
"Good, come here I have something to show you." She looked at him curiously, but followed out in the living room of their penthouse. There were pictures laying on the table.
"What are these?" She asked.
"I was thinking that the apartment is nice and everything, but maybe we should start house hunting," he told her. "I mean, you and I both want kids, and I want them to grow up in a house in the suburbs." She nodded showing that she understood. "Of course we'll keep the apartment too, and stay here on the weekdays until we have kids." They sat on the couch together looking at the pictures that Pete had placed in front of her. She leafed through and found one that she liked. I'm happy, she told herself. I have everything that I want. But a nagging feeling inside told her that she wasn't being perfectly honest with herself.
Back to you
It always comes around
back to you
I tried to forget you
I tried to stay away
but it's too late
Chandler stood at the back of the church. He had lied of course. He had every intention of seeing her get married, but he didn't want to have to face her or their old friends. So he stayed hidden behind a large display of flowers and silently let the tears fall as the love of his life married another man. He was right, Monica did look beautiful, but what hurt, was that she looked happy. He wanted her to be happy, but he didn't want her to be happy with anyone but him. Chandler saw that she gazed into Pete's eyes looking completely fulfilled. Was it a good acting job? Or was she really that much in love with him. Chandler prayed it was the first, but with a sinking feeling realized that it had to be the latter. She loved Pete. He had lost. He had played the game, but lost. He had lost Monica, and along with her, everything that he had fantasized about his future, the truth was he had always had a crush on her. He had always held her on a pedal stool. He watched as they announced the new Mr. and Mrs. Peter Becker and Rachel, who was her maid of honor, handed her a bouquet of red roses that contrasted with her dark hair that had been piled on top of her head with a tiny tiara making her look truly like a princess. She smiled as she passed the guests who were there for her. He couldn't go to the reception, he couldn't see them dance their first dance as husband and wife, and he couldn't hear the toasts made to them. Because he didn't think that he could handle it. Chandler needed to leave. He needed air and space to think.
"Chandler?" It was Joey. He had been caught. He turned around.
"Hey," he said quietly.
"What are you doing here? Monica said that you couldn't come."
"I wasn't going to," he admitted. Joey had been the only one to know about Monica and Chandler's short, but passionate affair.
"You always come back to her," Joey said giving him a piece of wisdom that was rare coming from his friend. "You can't live without her, and deep down you do want her to be happy, even if it is with the billionaire that we all thought was crazy. On the surface you wanted to see her run out on him, but that would have caused her pain, and that's something that you never want. But you always come back to her." Chandler nodded.
"I have nothing to come back to anymore," he told his friend. "It was good seeing you. I'll call. " With that Chandler escaped through the backdoor leaving Joey to go to the reception. Monica danced with Pete and she held onto her new husband, but Joey could see in her eyes that if she would've been dancing with someone else right then, she would have been happier.
I'm so good at forgetting
And I quit every game I play
but forgive me, love
I can't turn and walk away
"Pete and I have an announcement to make," Monica said at dinner a few months later. "We're going to have a baby!" Everyone offered their congratulations, but Joey held back. He wanted to scream at Monica. Do you know how many hearts you're breaking? Yours, Chandler's, and eventually Pete's. You can't live without Chandler, who are you kidding? You'll go back to him. He gave her smile and a hug and wondered if he should break this news to Chandler. It would undoubtedly break what remained of his heart. They sat in Monica and Pete's penthouse and admired the view and the others admired the couple. They thought that Monica and Pete were the perfect couple. Joey wanted to say to them, you never saw the perfect couple. Chandler and Monica were the perfect couple. The way that they looked into each other's eyes, and the way that they complemented each other so well. Joey had been sure, as he figured Monica and Chandler had been, that they were going to be together forever.
"Joey?" It was Phoebe.
"What Pheebs?"
"What's the matter? You know Monica is going to kill you if you're depressed on her big night," she teased. Joey offered a smile.
"I was just thinking about Chandler," he said.
"Oh yeah, someone should call him and tell him the wonderful news," she said. She ran to find a phone, and Joey hit his forehead. He didn't have to worry about whether or not to call Chandler. That was being taken care of.
Chandler's phone rang and he answered.
"Hello?"
"Chandler?"
"Hey Pheebs, how are you?"
"Good, you?"
"Fine, how's New York?"
"Good."
"And everyone?" What he wanted to ask was Monica. How was Monica? He wanted to single her out and talk about her for hours.
"Everyone is good. We called because one of us is about to become two," Phoebe said in her usual confusing way.
"Huh?"
"Monica is pregnant!" She was pregnant? Chandler felt his grip begin to slip on the phone handle and he told Phoebe that hat of course was wonderful news and hung up before he had a total breakdown on the phone. Chandler had hoped that Monica would come to her senses, divorce Pete, and come to Chicago and be with him. This fantasy of his reoccurred in his head every night. But every morning, he woke up to find that he was laying in an empty bed by himself. And she was miles away with her husband. And they were going to have a baby. He had been officially forgotten for a better offer, a better life then he had been able to offer her.
Back to you
it always comes around
back to you
I walk with your shadow
I'm sleeping in my bed
with your silhouette
"Chandler, please come visit," Rachel had pleaded.
"Yes, we miss you," Ross was on the other line.
"For me?" Phoebe had gotten on the line and now was joining in the campaign to get Chandler back to New York.
"I...I have a lot of work to do," he had lied.
"Please?" Rachel asked. And Chandler had relinquished. Now he was standing in Rachel's apartment, that once she had cohabited with Monica looking around at all the pictures that brought back so many memories.
"How's Monica?" He asked. Joey raised one eyebrow at him.
"She's good," Rachel said smiling as she placed the dishes on the table for dinner. "You know, Kathryn is two. She's so cute!"
"And she's still married to Pete?" Chandler tried to be nonchalant about it.
"Yep," Rachel said. "Although, he's never around, so I don't know how she can stay married to the guy."
"Hey, he's a good father," Ross said defending his brother-in-law. "And he loves Monica, I mean everyone can see that." What's not to love? Chandler thought. Everyone should adore her.
"We're all going over there tomorrow night for dinner," Phoebe said. "You'll get to see her then." They continued to talk about Chandler and his life in Chicago, but his mind was preoccupied. Tomorrow he would see her again. For the first time in three years.
They pulled up to the mansion and got out. Chandler followed his friends as they knocked on the door. A butler opened it and ushered them in. Pete appeared in the front hall and gave everyone a hug.
"Chandler? It's so good to see you! Monica is going to be so thrilled that you're here! Honey? Guess who came all the way from Illinois!" Monica appeared at the top of the steps with a little girl clutching her hand. She leaned down and carried the girl, who looked just like her down the stairs.
"Chandler? Is that you?" She was still as beautiful as he had remembered.
"Hi," was all he could manage to get out.
"Auntie Rachel!" Kate exclaimed wiggling out of her mother's arms and toddling over to her aunt. Rachel scooped her up and kissed her nose.
"Hey Katie bear," she said. Everyone else began fawning all over the small child, but Chandler and Monica remained in their original positions. They had forgotten everything else and just saw each other. Monica knew that the feelings that she had had were still there. They had just been waiting to resurface. Pete slipped his arm around his wife and kissed her temple, and Chandler was once again reminded that she wasn't his.
"We should all go out to eat," Pete suggested.
"You know what?" Monica said. "I don't really feel that good, you guys go and I'll stay back."
"Are you sure?" Pete asked.
"Uh-huh," Monica gave him a smile. She picked up her daughter and smiled. "You have fun."
"I'll stay here," Chandler said. "I just had a big meal. You five go." Pete nodded jovially and gave his wife and daughter a kiss.
"I'll drive separately," Pete said. "I have to run to the office afterwards."
"You four can just go on home after," Chandler told his friends. "No point in coming all the way out here to get me. I'll call a cab." Joey raised an eyebrow, but ushered the rest of his friends out of the front door.
"Bye," Rachel smiled and waved. Pete went and got his car and the other four got into theirs and drove away leaving Monica and Chandler alone.
Should have smiled in that picture
if it's the last that I'll see of you
It's the least that you
Could not do
"So," Chandler said a few hours and glasses of wine later. "Did you think about me when you were getting married?" She looked at him in surprise.
"No," she said shaking her head. "It was too hard to think about you, so I never let myself do it." He seemed satisfied with that answer and looked deep into her blue eyes.
"You're daughter looks just like you," he told her.
"I know she does, poor thing," Monica said laughing.
"Why? She'll be the most beautiful woman in the world next to her mother," he said. "And she'll break hearts just like her mother."
"Whose heart did I break?" Monica asked.
"Mine," he told her leaning forward. "You broke mine."
"I didn't mean to," she whispered. He was an inch away from her. "It went both ways you know. You broke my heart as well." As they were about to kiss, the doorbell rang.
"Saved by the bell," Chandler said. Monica got herself back together and found herself flushed. The butler came into the room.
"Mrs. Becker? There are officers here to see you," he told her.
"Thanks Henry." Chandler followed her out of the room and into the massive front hallway. There were two police officers standing there.
"Are you Mrs. Becker?" They asked. She nodded.
"How can I help you?"
"We're sorry, there was an accident and your husband was killed instantly," the first officer said. Monica felt her knees go weak under her body and she began to drop to the floor before everything went black. Chandler grabbed her before she hit the ground and kneeled down.
"Monica? Mon? Wake up and talk to me," he begged. She didn't stir and he carried her to the couch in Pete's office and laid her down. He got the information from the police and thanked them and went back to where she was laying. He sat with her until she woke up.
"Please tell me that that was a dream," she pleaded.
"I'm so sorry Mon," he told her.
"But...Pete! Katie can't grow up without a dad! I need him!" She was sobbing and clinging to Chandler. "And we...almost....he was so...I didn't....what did I do?" Chandler tried to calm her down, and eventually called the doctor when she wouldn't stop. She was shaking and he was afraid that she would go into shock. The doctor came and gave her sleeping medicine and she took it and went right to sleep. Chandler found the phone and called the apartment to tell the gang what had happened.
"Is Monica okay?" Phoebe asked.
"She's pretty shaken up about it," Chandler admitted.
"We'll be there first thing tomorrow morning," Ross told him. "Can you stay there with her?"
"Sure," Chandler said running his hand through his hair. The wine's affects had worn off long before and he couldn't contain the emotions that he was feeling anymore and went into the bathroom and threw water on his face. He had to stay strong, because the next day Monica would need him and he needed to be there for her.
Leave the light on
I'll never give up on you
leave the light on
for me too
The funeral was a couple days later, Monica held her daughter's hand tightly as they made their way through the press gathered outside the church and then outside the gates of their house. Pete had been a well-known business man, and all of his fortune had been left to Monica and Kathryn. Kate didn't really understand what was happening and she kept asking for her father, and eventually Rachel came over and took her away from Monica, because Monica looked like she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. After the funeral, Monica locked herself in her bedroom and wouldn't let anyone in. Ross knocked on the door.
"What?" She yelled through the door.
"I just wanted to know if you were okay?" He called.
"Fine," was the muffled response and he shook his head and went back downstairs.
"Is she okay?" Phoebe asked. She hated to see her friend go through this. Now Monica was a widow at the age of thirty, and a single mother. She had a nanny of course, but she no longer had the support system that Pete had offered her. Chandler didn't know what to do, so he booked the first flight out and went back to Chicago, but found that he felt even more helpless there, so he was back within the week.
back to me
I know that it comes
back to me
doesn't it scare you
your will is not as strong
as it used to be
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