A/N: This is my first Literati fic, and I hope that I do the characters justice. Please review and leave constructive criticism, but don't be too hard on me. This is set in 'Say Goodnight Gracie' in the scene where Rory and Jess goes after each other in the diner. For the sake of the story, pretend that Luke has left before Rory comes back.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, if I did, Logan would never have existed and Rory and Jess would have lived happily ever after.
Jess can see her face
"True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen." -
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
She gets halfway home before she turns around for the second time and walks back to the diner. But when she stands outside the door, she once again hesitates. As she looks inside she sees him, sitting behind the counter reading a book. Just when she has decided to leave for the third time, he looks up; straight at her. Their eyes meet and for a moment, she forgets how to breathe. Warm brown eyes meeting icy blue. Her mind goes completely blank, and she even forgets her own name.
By then, it's too late to turn back, and she takes a deep breath before she pushes the door open and walks in. He doesn't move from his position, but puts the book down and focuses all his attention to her.
"Hi," she says softly, carefully, as if she expects him to scream at her.
"Hi," he replies, equally soft.
"How are you feeling?" she asks, worried about the bruises on his face.
"I'll live, it's not the first time I've been beat up and probably not the last time either,"
She doesn't answer, just looks down at the counter. 'I wonder how they keep it so spotless', she wonders, and looks up when he speaks.
"I didn't start it, you know," he grips the counter as he speaks. "The fight. Dean started it."
She nods slightly. "I know," an uncomfortable silence spreads through the diner. "Where did we go wrong?"
"I don't know," he says, though he knows exactly what has gone wrong. It's him, he knows it. Him and his problems, his insecurities. She can do better than him.
"I think we're lacking in communication skills," she says thoughtfully after a few minutes of silence. "I realize now that I've gotten too used to Dean's affectionate nature, and expect you to be the same,"
"I'm not him,"
"I know you're not, and I don't want you to be,"
"Well, didn't this turn into a soap opera," he says, trying to lighten the mood.
She chuckles. "Yeah, it did," then her expression turns serious. "Come one Jess, talk to me. Tell me what's wrong,"
"Rory," he pleads, but she stands her ground.
"No, you're not getting out of this lightly. Tell me what's bugging you,"
"I couldn't get prom tickets," he says, slightly ashamed that he's once again lying to her. But he doesn't want her to know what a failure he is.
"That's not it," she states, and sits down. They're close now, so close that she can almost feel the warmth of his breath with every exhale.
"And what if it is?" his cynical tone is back, but she ignores it.
"It's not. You're a bad liar Jess,"
"Damn," he mutters. He's not normally a bad liar. The opposite, he's an excellent liar. He's a good liar with everybody except Rory. Something in him doesn't want to lie to her, and so his lies goes bad. "I have to repeat my senior year,"
She frowns. "Why?"
He sighs, finding the words hard to say. "I've missed too many days. Even if I go to summer school it's still not enough,"
She grabs a hold of his hand, and squeezes. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because..." he pauses, and looks down. "Because I didn't want you to be ashamed of me," he hates that he's so vulnerable, that she can make him feel this way. He doesn't let people in, doesn't let them see the real him. Only a small handful of people in his life has gotten to know the real him, and Rory's one of them. He might even love her.
"I could never be ashamed of you," she exclaims. "There's no reason why you shouldn't repeat your senior year and graduate next year,"
He shrugs. "I don't know if I want to finish. I'm not going to college, so why bother,"
"You are the smartest person I know, you can do this," she tries to convince him. "Please do it," she pauses. "For me?"
He looks up at her, and tries to tell her with his eyes what he can't speak out loud. He's never been good with words, probably a family trait. "I'll try," it's a vague promise, but it's the best he can do. She seems satisfied smiles at him, the smile he likes -loves?- so much. He feels like he should say something, and struggle to find the words.
"I hope you're not pissed off at me about last night," he blurts out, like a word-vomit burning its way up his throat.
"Which part?" her tone is light, teasing.
"The bedroom part. I shouldn't have pushed you- I'm sorry," wow, he's actually apologizing and meaning it. That hasn't happened in a long time.
"It's okay, I know now that you must have been really stressed out. It was just the wrong place," she doesn't know if it was the wrong time. What if they'd been in her room? Would she still have pushed him away?
The distance between them, even though it's not big, is frustrating him and he longs to kiss her. "Do you wanna go upstairs? To talk, I mean. Luke will be back soon,"
She isn't worried, feels no need to be. She just wants to spend time with him, in a place where no one can see them, judge them. She nods. "Yeah,"
Hesitantly, almost shyly he grabs her hand and they walk upstairs. The glass door rattles a bit when he closes it behind them. The apartment looks just like the last time she saw it, and yet totally different. They stand awkwardly in the middle of the room, like they did all those months ago, right before they shared their second kiss.
Slowly he brings her closer to him, and wraps an arm around her waist. She smiles shyly up at him and slowly brings her arm up around his neck. She caresses the soft hairs at the back of his neck.
"Hi," she says with a smile on her face.
"Hi," he replies, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
"I think it's time to add another word," she quotes Luke, earning a small chuckle from him.
"Or maybe we should stop talking," his trademark smirk is evident on his face, and his eyes lingers on her lips before he leans down and kisses her. She closes her eyes and leans into him, pressing their bodies closer. She moans as his hands finds the soft skin on her lower back, and he takes the opportunity to carefully trace his tongue along her lower lip.
"That was nice," she says a few minutes later when they've broken apart.
"Yeah," he replied, a hand coming up to stroke her cheek.
Her eyes gets clouded with something he can't distinguish, but before he can ask her what's wrong, she opens her mouth to speak.
"I...I think I love you," she half-whispers and she tightens her grip on him, as if she's trying to keep him from running. When he doesn't say anything, she looks down, trying to hide the fact that she's nearly crying.
He doesn't know what to say. He feels a warm sensation spread in his stomach at her words.
She loves him.
She loves him.
She loves him.
Tilting her head up so that their eyes meet, he says the words he's never said to anyone before. "I think I love you too,"
Her mouth bends in a smile, and he feels one form on his own lips. "Yeah?" that single monosyllable word is filled with hope and love.
He nods. "Yeah,"
This time it's she who initiates the kiss. She attacks his mouth with a fire and passion that he hasn't seen in her before, and it throws him off for a second. When she starts to move them towards his bed, he stops her.
"Rory, we don't have to...I don't expect you to-"
"I know," she cuts him off. "But I want to. I'm ready,"
Accepting her decision, he starts to kiss her again, moving them to his bed. She sits down when the back of her knees hits the edge of the bed, and then proceeds to move back with Jess on top of her. When her hands finds his belt buckle, he breaks away.
"You sure?" he looks deep into her eyes, giving her a chance to back out. She doesn't take it.
"I'm sure. I love you Jess," she says, and he smiles before leaning down to kiss her again.
"Paris Eustace Geller,"
Jess can't help the smile that's on his face as one student after the other walks up to get his or her diploma. He's gotten over the fact that he won't graduate until next year, and simply takes the days as they come.
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore,"
He sits up straighter, trying to get a good look at her. He's not that tall though, so his efforts are useless. He sees her walk up and accept her diploma, and then look out over the crowd.
Rory isn't nervous as she walks up on the podium. She's been waiting for this day for a long time, and now it's finally here. Jess has been an angel for the past month, not complaining once when she went over her college plans, even though it must have hurt him.
She accepts her diploma with a smile, and then looks out over all the relatives that are here today. Her eyes finds his, and she can see him mouth 'I'm proud of you'. She mouths 'I love you' back, and then grimaces at her mother. She feels her eyes tear up, and is careful not to trip over the steps. She walks back to her seat, and it feels like a second later, the ceremony is over. Caps are thrown in the air, laughter rings through the air and smiles graces young and hopeful faces, eager to start their life after high school.
After talking to Paris, she turns around and a big smile appears on her face when she sees Jess walk towards her, hands stuck deep into his pockets. He's wearing black jeans, but has actually thrown on a black blazer over a The Clash t-shirt. She remembers clearly the small argument he and Luke had because he refused to wear a suit.
When he sees that she's spotted him, he hurries up his steps, longing to hold her in his arms. When they finally reach each other, she throws herself in his arms, holding on to his neck tightly. He spins her around, and her laughter rings in his ears.
"You were great up there," he says, and she smiles.
"You think so?"
"Off course. You didn't trip, that's an achievement,"
"Stop it," she playfully punches his arm. "I'm proud of you, you know,"
"For the blazer? 'Cuz it's really not a big deal,"
She chuckles. "No, for coming today. For being here when I need you,"
"What can I say; I'm a good person to have around,"
"I agree to that," she says slyly and catches his lips in her own. He kisses her back immediately, but is stopped by a voice before the kiss can get too heated.
"Hey you to, come on. There's more people who wanna talk to you,"
They break apart, and Rory looks over at Lorelai, a smile on her face. "We're coming," she turns back to Jess. "So there's this post-graduation party at my grandparents' house now, but I promise you that we'll go somewhere quiet tonight, just the two of us,"
"The bridge?" he says, an eyebrow raised.
"Our bridge," she corrects him. He smiles, and they start to walk towards where Lorelai and the other's are waiting. Jess' fingers are entwined with hers, and he can't help but to feel that finally, he's managed to do something right.
THE END