A/N: I don't care if you flame me, really…I'll probably just ignore it. Anyway, here you go! This just popped up in my head one day. I admit to hypocrisy in one or two places…XD But this was just fun to write, and I couldn't help myself.
I am Not an Otaku
I am not an otaku. An otaku is a person who is absorbed with Japan on a level that is firmly based on Anime pop culture. They eat Maruchan ramen with wooden chopsticks on a daily basis, while reciting 'Itadakimasu!' without the faintest idea of what it truly means.
I am not an otaku.
I don't attend western Otakuns and niether do I use Japanglish when referring to my 'tomodachi'...because the articles -kun & -chan are strictly reserved for those who actually KNOW Japanese. And though I flitter between the phrases in the area of fiction, I refuse to use them in live action.
Hence, I am not an otaku.
An otaku's sentiments are firmly based on exaggerated terms such as 'Kawaii!' and 'Mou', and very seldom do they leave their homes without the comforts of plush cat ears and J-pop blasting on their iPods. They have looked up the lyrics to each and every song, determined to integrate the words firmly into the abused fibers of their brains. Their obsession wavers on a caliber unheard of. They are pensive only when searching for the best brand of pocky.
Yaoi is 'SUGOI'. The immense fan base of guy-on-guy action is, indeed, composed of preteen American females who haunt the manga shelves in twittering herds. They are consumed with the idea that they may one day become kunoichi...therefore, they store paper shuriken in their ammunition pouches.
Naruto is 'Dattebayo!', Inuyasha must 'Osuwari', and the Mary Sue of their stories must always be a rape victim of either Orochimaru and/or Uchiha Itachi. On more than one occasion, Yuuki Sayuri Megumi Chiyo III is usually the barer of a rare bloodline, and the envy of the Hyuuga estate. I stand firm, when I say that:
I am NOT an otaku.