The Aftermath

Gin/Rangiku

He would hide the fact that he was different, unable to show his affection for anyone… not that he felt affection for any great number of people. When he did, however, he would do anything to please them. My first and greatest regret will always be that Aizen demanded more from him than I did, leading him onto the path that brought us all here. He would do anything for me, but he would do even more for his Taichou. That's the story of his life. Ichimaru, the traitor, sure… but I'd rather call him Gin, the stupidly loyal.

Sure, he has a sadistic streak the size of Seireitei. It probably wasn't hard for Aizen to channel that, forming the cold-blooded killer that most see when they look at him. Only some are old enough to know Gin as he was straight out of the Academy; both naïve and terrible, hand-in-hand. So much power, in the grasp of one who was given to respect only those with even more power. Of course. Unlike Hitsugaya, he didn't have a big sister and a "granny" to keep him safe. He wasn't raised under a shielding roof in the first district. Those who consider my Taichou's past a harsh life… have never heard Gin's story as I know it.

It began in the rain-dark streets of outer Rukongai. Fear, pain and cold was always a part of life there, but the others could never understand my craving for food. They understood the implications, but it merely served to set me apart even more from the rest of them. Then I met him, the little silver-haired boy that was Gin before he lost his soul.

I see his smiling face. Only then do I realise that I must be dreaming. I have a feeling that I don't have time to dream. That there's something I should be doing, or am already too late for, but the sight of Gin's smiling face… the good kind of smile, not the one he developed after he lost the fight for his self-governance. That other one, the one that most see when they look at him, that one is fake, even if he probably believes in it himself.

He is with me, now. His presence, his reiatsu is soothing and familiar.

"Rangiku."

He keeps smiling at me, but it's turned into a sad sort of smile. I can't reach him, can't touch him; I try to walk toward him, but he just keeps slipping further away. It only gets worse when I start to run. Ichimaru! He can't leave me! Why is he leaving me when I need him?

"Ran-chan!"

He's calling me from afar, but there's a shadow in the way. The shadow takes the form of my Taichou.

Matsumoto, you're late. Don't tell me you were up all night again. Couldn't Ichimaru-taichou at least make sure you got home?

They never really did like each other. Both young geniuses, the competition was a bit too obvious. Always taking its toll. I try to explain to him that I'm trying to reach Gin, but he keeps slipping away and it's really frustrating. Hitsugaya-taichou disappears like smoke in the wind, and a moment later Ukitake-taichou stands in his stead. He doesn't say a word, but his sad smile has a bit of a reproachful look to it that says more than a thousand words. I don't have time for this, I keep trying to get around him, but he somehow manages to be in the way wherever I turn. Then the image morphs. I can see Gin in the background, staring at me with his head cocked just a little, as if he's wondering what's taking so long. Or maybe that's the look he had on his face when he opened the Garganta to flee the battlefield. The… wait! But the figure between me and Gin just grins at me.

I win again, Aizen says solemnly.

"Y've got'teh wake up, Ran-chan." He's shaking me. My body hurts. I want to tell him to let me sleep, like I used to do when we were little. I want to tell him all the things I've been thinking since he turned, but the words just won't come. Aizen's voice is still too fresh in my mind.

All I manage is a pained, unintelligible noise.

"Y' wouldn't say tha' if you knew the whole story," he disagrees. I feel an icy cold hand on my forehead. "Yer still burnin' up. Tha' ain't no good." He touches my cheek, but all I can do is shiver. It's starting to come back to me.

Aizen did tell me he'd won again, but he hadn't counted on the past to come back to haunt him. Or if he did, he probably didn't count on the two of us finally caving. Sure, Gin could defect, he could leave me to fight Arrancar that I couldn't possibly win against… because he knew that my Taichou and the others would always be there to protect me. He had no one to defend himself, though, so I caved first. That Vizard sure looked surprised when he ran me through by mistake, just because I placed myself in his path. Of course, Aizen was too sure at that point not to gloat about his upcoming victory. I'm not sure Gin himself knows why he picked me up and ran for it, but I do know that it changed the outcome of the war. Drastically.

"Mah sweet, stupid Ran-chan," he mumbles dryly, wiping the sweat off my forehead with the edge of his shihakusho. He's an idiot, but one I can't live without.

"Gin… you're such a bastard." He just kept on smiling in that unreadable way of his, waiting for me to fall back into the sleep that was hovering just over me.