(Archie Simpson is standing on the dock of an island)
Archie: Hello everyone, my name is Archie Simpson and this is Total Drama Takeover! Now you're probably wondering where Chris is since he normally hosts this show. I'm the new host since half of the contestants are students at my school, Degrassi. These kids have been driving me insane for 12 seasons now and I managed to get 15 of them to sign up for this show, which will torture them. Time for a cheesy intro now!
Intro: Brick does a back flip off the dock and Adam claps, looking surprised. The camera pans to Jenna who is playing her guitar until Izzy comes and smashes it, screaming and laughing. Jenna rolls her eyes. The camera pans to Maya who is splashed by Zig, who laughs at her. Trent pushes Zig into the water and Gwen looks jealous. The camera pans to Lindsay and Fiona who are freaking out over clothes and Imogen is standing off to the side, looking annoyed. Alli receives a flower from Alejandro and blushes while Heather looks furious. The camera pans to Tristan who is watching Cody and KC talk. Geoff and Bridgette are making out and Katie and Jake throw a bucket of water on them, high fiving afterwards. Eli is looking into the ocean and Dawn walks up to him and smiles. Bianca and Leshawna are arguing and Drew tries to get in between them, not knowing what to do. Tori and Zoey are running and laughing while Duncan watches them and rolls his eyes. Dakota looks into the camera, smirks, and takes off her glasses. She turns around and "Total Drama Takeover" zooms out from her shirt.
Archie: So that was interesting! Now we should meet our contestants. Our first team, the Hideous Hippos will consist of Total Drama All-Stars. Let's meet them.
Lindsay: OMG it's great to be back! I don't even know who you are though!
Gwen: Where's Chris?
Archie: I'm gonna be your new host! My name is Archie!
Duncan: Nice name, where'd you get it? The retirement home?
Dawn: His name is telling me that he has hidden pain. It's all over his aura as well!
Archie: What?
Zoey: She does that, it's like her thing.
Heather: It's kinda freaking me out. Great, another weird girl. We already have Izzy.
Izzy: I heard my name! Is it the po-po?!
Bridgette: Not yet, Izzy.
Brick: The police are after her? For real?
Trent: Oh yeah, ever since the first season.
Geoff: It's like her running gag.
Cody: So Gwen, aren't you happy we can do a whole new season together?
Gwen: Uh, sure Cody.
Mike: I get to meet some new people, this is great!
Alejandro: Some new girls to flirt with…
Dakota: This beach is much better than the last one. Maybe I won't turn into a monster again!
Leshawna: A monster? Damn, I'm glad I got to miss a season of this cray-cray game.
Archie: Do you guys want to see who you're up against.
Trent: I'm slightly concerned…
Archie: Oh you should be. This is a team of new campers who all go to my school. This is the Revolting Rhinos!
Fiona: Uh, this place is gross. I'm not staying here.
Imogen: The boat already left, Fionz. We're stuck here!
Jake: Simpson what up? You told us this was a show.
Archie: It is.
Bianca: What can we win?
Fiona: I don't care, I'm out!
Archie: A millions dollars.
Fiona: Did I hear a million?
Tristan: I thought you weren't staying?
Fiona: It's a million dollars, I'd be stupid to leave.
Tori: Do we at least have nice places to sleep?
Drew: Or places to sleep period?
Archie: I think…
Jenna: You think? How pathetic is this budget?
Archie: It's season 5 and the shows on its final leg okay!
KC: Obviously, this place is a dump.
Eli: But a great movie location.
Maya: I'm not being a zombie again!
Zig: Same, having one arm was bad enough for a day!
Eli: Dammit…
Katie: There doesn't look like much competition…I got this in the bag.
Adam: Hold on soccer star, we all have the same amount of chances.
Katie: Alright Adam, whatever you say…
Alli: So when do we start?
Archie: Right now, are you ready for your first challenge?
Lindsay: But we just got here!
Archie: That's okay!
Gwen's Confessional: I knew it was a bad idea to come on this stupid show again…
Katie: Not all my teammates are…the best competitors, so I'll have to make up for some of their inexperience, AKA Tristan.
Izzy: I am so pumped! WHOOOO!
Tristan: I don't want to get dirty…that's one thing I can't stand.
Archie: Alright, for your first challenge, you'll be having a good 'ol game of dodgeball…with water balloons.
Alli: So a water balloon fight?
Archie: Stop making it seem less awesome! At the sound of the whistle, you guys will all grab a water balloon and try to hit a member of the opposite team. If they get hit, they're out. The last person left wins it for their team. Sound easy enough?
Duncan: I get to throw things…fun.
Fiona: I have to get wet?!
Leshawna: Avoid the balloons and you won't get wet.
Leshawna: I've only known this bitch for ten minutes and I already want to smack her!
Fiona: Nobody said I would have to get wet when I signed up!
Archie: Alright, take your positions. In 3, 2, 1…GO!
(Everyone runs to grab a balloon)
Leshawna: Sorry sweetheart!
Fiona: No!
(Fiona gets hit by Leshawna)
Archie: Fiona is out!
Fiona: That bitch is DEAD!
Leshawna: I would be lying if I said that wasn't fun!
Katie: Drew and Bianca, the three of us work together?
Drew: Nah, I got this.
(Drew throws one at Cody, but hits Adam instead)
Adam: The hell Drew?!
Katie: You should have listened.
Bianca: Me and you Katie.
(They start throwing balloons)
Geoff: Duncan and Alejandro, let's show these newbies how it's done.
(They all three throw balloons and hit Imogen, Tori, and Zig)
Tori: Ah!
Imogen: Fiddlesticks!
Bianca: Katie, get those guys out!
Katie: On it!
(Katie throws one at Duncan when his back is turned)
Duncan: Dammit!
Duncan: That's one tough chick…
Gwen: Leshawna, let's get these girls out.
Leshawna: Already on it hun!
(Leshawna throws one at Maya and misses)
Tristan: No one messes with my bestie!
(Tristan gets Leshawna out)
Gwen: Thanks for leaving me hanging Leshawna!
(Maya throws one at Gwen and Trent jumps in front of her to save her, but gets hit instead)
Gwen: Wow…thanks Trent.
Trent: No problem.
Gwen: Doesn't Trent know we've been over for like 3 years?
Trent: I don't know why I saved Gwen…it just seemed like the right thing to do. I hope my team doesn't get too upset…
(Katie and Bianca hit Lindsay, Bridgette, Cody, Mike, and Zoey)
Katie: We're on a roll, let's keep it going.
Bianca: Oh god…
Katie: What is it?
Bianca: Her…
Izzy: WATCH OUT BITCHES!
Jenna: Run!
(Izzy throws a handful of balloons and gets Tristan, Maya, Jenna, KC, and Alli out)
Tristan: We made it pretty far.
Maya: Nice job teammate!
Jake: Eli, double time!
(Jake hits Dakota and Dawn and Eli hits Heather and Brick)
Heather: I was taken out by Emo Boy. This is insane!
Archie: So now it's Gwen, Izzy, Geoff and Alejandro against Jake, Eli, Katie and Bianca.
Geoff: Izzy, get a stash of more balloons. Gwen, get the girls out. Alejandro, we've got the guys.
Alejandro: This should be easy.
(Alejandro hits Eli)
Eli: Damn! Sorry guys!
Katie: We've got this!
(Bianca trips on her heels and Gwen hits her)
Katie: Bianca! Thanks a lot!
Bianca: Sorry Katie!
Jake: Guess it's just us.
Katie: Let's just charge at them.
Jake: Will it work?
Katie: One can hope…
Katie: My adrenaline was pumping…I had to win.
(Katie and Jake run at the other team and throw their balloons, but miss)
Gwen: This is our chance!
(Geoff hits Jake and Katie gets hit by Gwen)
Katie: No! We were so close!
Jake: Calm down, Katie. It's just a challenge. There will be more we can win.
Katie: Whatever.
Archie: And Geoff, Alejandro, Gwen, and Izzy win for the Hippos!
Izzy: YAY!
Izzy: We won! I totally rocked that challenge! Woot!
Katie: So close…yet so far.
Bianca: I really like Katie and I'm glad that we can be friends after everything that happened with Drew, but she was insane out there.
Archie: Team Rhinos, looks like you'll be voting someone off tonight. How embarrassing will it be to be the first person out? I'm glad one of you runts will have to experience the misery. I'll see you tonight.
Maya: Great…
Katie: We did lose…but now I can make a great social strategy and make a solid alliance.
Maya: I want to be a definite power in this game…but keep it under the radar. I should at least make it to the merge, I hope.
Katie: We need to work together Bianca.
Bianca: Agreed, who else can we take with us to the end?
Katie: My sister and her friends will vote for whoever we do. We don't need to take them to end, but they'll be more votes for us.
Bianca: Sounds good. Drew and Jake will definitely vote with us and maybe Fiona and Imogen.
Katie: So who do we want out?
Bianca: I don't know…this is hard.
Katie: I have Bianca and Jake and Maya definitely with me, so this should go smoothly for a while.
Maya: Katie probably thinks that just because she's my sister, I'll vote with her, but she's wrong. This is my game and I'm going to do what makes mine better, not hers.
Tristan: Alright, so we're a solid four right?
Tori: Obviously, we won't turn on each other.
Zig: Who are you guys thinking should be the first to go?
Maya: Well who was weakest in the challenge?
Tori: Fiona went out first…pretty pathetically.
Tristan: And Drew didn't even hit someone from our team!
Zig: So between them?
Tristan: Fiona and me are somewhat friendly, maybe she and Imogen would vote with us?
Maya: And I don't think any of us like Drew.
Tori: But do we need him to help us win challenges? I mean he's strong.
Zig: We have KC and Jake and… me.
(The others all laugh)
Zig: I was being serious.
Maya: Whatever you say Zig.
Tori: This is so much fun! I get to work with my besties!
Tristan: They might be my friends, but if it'll help my game to vote one of them out, I'll do it in a heartbeat. I need to find maybe another alliance to be in just to make my chances greater.
Alli: So I made an alliance with Jenna, KC, Eli, Adam, and moi. There's five votes, which is a good number.
Jenna: We should be safe for a while at least.
KC: Maybe we could use more numbers though…
Tristan: Hey guys, what's up?
(Eli nudges KC and winks)
KC: Just strategizing. We're kinda forming an alliance together if you want to join.
Tristan: Me? Really?
Eli: Well you fought zombies in my film like nobody's business. You could be the same way in the game too.
Jenna: We can always use more numbers!
Adam: So us six until the end?
Alli: Perfect!
Tristan: Mission complete!
Maya: So who knows Katie better than her own sister? I know what makes her tick and I know how to use her to my advantage in this game.
Maya: Katie, can we talk?
Katie: Sure.
Maya: Who are you thinking to vote out?
Katie: Fiona, I like her, but she's way too weak.
Maya: Well that's what I was thinking but then I heard Drew talking about the girls on the other team and I realized, he's going to flirt his way right through this game.
Katie: Really?
Katie: How could I not see this before!
Maya: Piece of cake.
Katie: It'd be smart to get him out right away. How many numbers do you have?
Maya: Just 4.
Katie: I can get Fiona, Imogen, Jake, and maybe even Eli to vote off Drew.
Maya: We're gonna make a move, sis.
Katie: Oh yeah we are.
(They high five)
Katie: Goodbye Drew…you've overstayed your welcome.
Fiona: So after I sucked in the challenge today…I'm a little worried I might be voted off. I can't be out first, that would suck!
Fiona: Do you think people would vote for me?
Imogen: It's not really your fault when you think about it.
Fiona: But will others think about it that way?
Imogen: Calm down, babe. I'll talk to Eli and see what he's been hearing.
Fiona: Thanks.
(They kiss and Imogen walks up to Eli)
Imogen: Who have you been hearing?
Eli: Unfortunately, Fiona.
Imogen: Seriously?
Eli: Yeah, I'm obviously not voting for her, but I know a lot of people are.
Imogen: Enough people to get her out?
Eli: Maybe?
Imogen: Okay…get whoever you can to vote for Katie since she went all psycho today.
Eli: Alright, I'll try my best.
Imogen: I'm not going to let my girlfriend be the first out. Katie, you'd better watch your back because I'm about to stab it.
(Everyone walks to the elimination ceremony)
Archie: Hi guys! Welcome to the elimination ceremony. You guys will vote for who you want out of the competition and afterwards, I'll award the safe contestants a golden marshmallow. Sound easy?
Jake: I guess.
Archie: Then go vote!
(Everyone votes and Archie comes back with 14 marshmallows)
Archie: 14 marshmallows, 15 contestants. Let's see who's safe…Jenna.
Jenna: Yay!
Archie: KC, Eli, Bianca, and Jake.
Bianca: As expected.
Archie: Maya, Alli, Tristan, and Adam.
Tristan: One down, 27 to go!
Maya: Oh yeah!
(They high five)
Archie: Tori, Imogen and Zig.
Tori: Thank gawsh!
Archie: That leaves Fiona, Drew, and Katie.
Katie: What?!
Archie: Katie shush, you're safe.
Katie: Duh.
Fiona: Oh no…
Drew: What the hell?
Archie: One of you had 7 votes and the other 5.
Fiona: Please let me be safe…
Drew: I don't see why I wouldn't be safe…
Archie: The first person voted out of Total Drama Takeover is…Drew.
Drew: What? Who the hell voted for me?!
Bianca: What?
Katie: Too bad…
Drew: Whatever! Where do I leave?
Archie: Oh…well that's another surprise.
(Archie, Drew, and Bianca are at a cannon)
Bianca: You're shooting him out of a cannon!
Archie: Yup, seeya Drew!
Drew: Win for us, B!
Bianca: I will!
(Archie launches Drew into the ocean)
Archie: One down, 29 to go. Come back next time to see what other tortures I'm going to put these campers through on Total Drama Takeover!