Gravity

Rating: T

Category: Drama/Supernatural

Summary: A shinigami is different from a human in many ways. Shinigami don't feel compassion. They only strive to entertain themselves by any means. What made this shinigami different? He looked for amusement and found himself falling into doubt.

Prologue: Falling

Falling. He realized he was falling.

Such a strange concept. It was strange, foreign, yet still familiar. He let the wind blow the hair out of his face. He felt the wind in his face. To feel, another unfamiliar word. Had he ever felt before? He had to otherwise he wouldn't be able to recognize it, but he couldn't remember. Then he heard, heard the rush of the wind passing his ears. It felt good and he was flooded with relief. From what?

Nevertheless, he had an emotion. It felt so natural, so… human? That was him, a human, and humans had the ability to sense their surroundings with their senses. Five senses, to be precise: vision, hearing, smell, taste, and touch. He knew so much. Knowledge, another thing humans possessed. But that wasn't the point. He had already established that he was a human, the question was how much knowledge did he possess and of what?

Who was he? A human with senses, emotions and knowledge. But humans had more than that. He tried to remember what distinguishes humans from one and the other? What was it? It was the thing he still couldn't remember. Most humans were capable of feeling the same emotions, had the same senses and could gain similar knowledge. Those things didn't make a person out of a human. A person. That was the clue: to be a person you need a personality.

That was it. Still, it didn't help him. How was he supposed to remember his personality if he had no memories, no… past? That was what he was truly missing. He had no memories, no past. Amnesia, his brain supplied. Partial or total loss of memory, usually resulting from shock, psychological disturbance, brain injury, or illness. Did he suffer from amnesia? No, was his immediate reply, there was even more to it. And so he tried, he tried even harder to remember something, anything. He concentrated every fibre of his being on it. If he could remember something, he would have a clue, something to hang on to, to find his past and his personality.

He dully noticed that he was still falling. Falling. Perhaps… but what came after falling? He couldn't fall forever. It hit him… after falling came crash. He would… crash on the ground and it would most probably hurt, after all he must have fallen from quite a height to keep falling so… wait.

Hurt. That was it. He had it. He had a clue. Hurt, a negative emotions. It could be caused by falling from a great height or by being shot or experiencing a heart attack. A heart attack. The death of, or damage to, part of the heart muscle. He had a heart attack and… he died of it? No, there had to be a mistake. He wasn't dead after all. Or was he? He tried to remember. And he felt the pain. An unbelievable pain shock his chest, his heart and he died. But that wasn't everything; he had felt hurt because he… lost? Lost what? He didn't know. Someone had betrayed him. It had hurt, not only the pain of the heart attack but also the betrayal.

Murdered. He was killed, killed by someone he knew. Someone he trusted? No, whoever it was, he had a feeling he never trusted him, but he knew this person very well, they had made memories together.

There was still more than that. It was quite frustrating even for his genius mind. Another fact about himself, a clue to his personality? He had been smart, very smart. He had figured things out and made plans, but what for? What was his aim? What had he hoped to achieve? In a way he was certain that he never managed to reach his aim and he remembered begging not to be killed. He wanted to live a long life to… to make things better, make humanity better. He had been a saviour of mankind, worship by thousands. His life had been important. Then he was killed, not by an enemy, but by a companion, someone who had helped him in some way.

But the people had called him god. He had been a god. Who dares to kill a god? Was it another god? A god of death?

He stopped falling. No, not stopped, he crashed.

Shinigami.

Ryuk.

Death Note.

Apples.

Kira.

L.

Justice.

Task Force.

Misa.

Murderer.

Killer.

Kira.

Saviour.

God.

A better world.

Near.

Mello.

Kira.

Trap.

Sacrifice.

The yellow box.

Kira.

Matsuda.

Kira.

Heart attack.

Kira.

Death.

Kira. Kira. Kira… and then nothing.

A scream escaped his throat. Everything was back in place. All his memories, his past, his personality, everything was there. Light Yagami was back.

Mu, he must have gone to Mu. The user of a Death Note can neither go to heaven or hell. So Mu, Nothingness. He had felt nothing, remembered nothing, he had been nothing.

So what was different now? He wasn't in Mu, of so much he was certain. It also couldn't be in heaven or hell. Where else could he be? He felt a spark of hope but suppressed it. He had to remain rational and collected to find a way out of his current predicament.

Opening his eyes, he thought, was a good start. So slowly and carefully he opened both eyes and blinked.

He came face to face with dust. His face was hovering above the dusty ground yet he didn't touch the sand. He was floating just above it in some kind of wasteland. What a cruel joke to be brought from Mu to another kind of nothingness, another rotten world.

"Is the little genius finally awake?" A cold, harsh voice made Light strain his neck to look up.

A shinigami he had never seen before was seated right in front of him. His unfeeling eyes looked right through Light and he chuckled which was accompanied by the clanking of gems against bones. That was basically all of what the shinigami in front of him consisted. He sat on a throne made of sculls which were shaped like a halo behind his head. Otherwise he looked like a skeleton dressed up with jewellery. His mouth was shaped in an everlasting arrogant and still insane smile and his eyes were glowing red gems. Nevertheless, they looked different from Ryuk's. Ryuk's eyes were always full of mischief and curiosity, like the ones of a child, a cruel child tearing the wings from a butterfly. These eyes were nothing like his. They look intelligent and observant but still cruel and above everyone else, similar to his own. The eyes were the ones of a serial killer more brilliant than the rest, a true god.

Who was this shinigami? He was not an ordinary one, most definitely not. He had an air of superiority around him. But it couldn't be the king. Once Ryuk told him, the shinigami king was a terrifying creature and no human could look at him without losing his sanity. Light still felt quite sane, perhaps even saner than he had been in the moments prior to his death. This shinigami had power and was intelligent, so he was like a puppeteer probably. He looked smart enough to manipulate even the shinigami king. So he was the true ruler of the shinigami world. Now what would he want from Light, a human, never a god no matter how hard he tried.

"I am Armonia Jastin Beyondllemason, advisor of his Majesty, the King of all shinigami. You, Light Yagami, have been brought here to be offered a chance."

This sparked Light's interest. He had been brought here from Mu to the shinigami realm and met the right hand of the shinigami king. He could only come to one conclusion. But wasn't it too much to hope for? If he was right, he could continue his legacy as Kira from this realm without putting himself in danger. He could change the human world and Near wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. This was too good to be true.

The shinigami had to have caught on to Light's thoughts. The grin widened. "I see. You figured it out. But I wouldn't have expected less from the genius you promised to be. After all I recommended you to the king."

Why, why would he do so? This shinigami was intelligent. Why would he want competition? The other shinigami he met or heard about were not exactly dumb but they didn't reach the level of intelligence which Light and this shinigami seem to have. Light would be a threat to him. He could also try to win the favour of the king and influence him. So why bring him here? Light would have never done so.

"You don't understand. I didn't expected you to, to be fair. You are still human, after all. Shinigami think differently. We feel a lot less than you do. Everything seems dull to us because we have no purpose. So we are rotting and this world followed us on the same path. But you, you provided entertainment for Ryuk, our little rebel. I believe you are able to do the same for the others and me. You want to stop the world from rotting. I am giving you this opportunity. There are just a few shinigami as intelligent as you and me. With you intelligence and manipulative skills you can make a difference like you wanted."

He paused and studied Light's expression carefully.

Light understood him. He remembered the boredom after L's death. The entry task force was with a little bit of reverse psychology at his mercy. It was quite boring after a while. Sometimes he had even wished L back just to be challenged again. This shinigami had as far as Light knew everything; power, intelligence, influence. If you got so far life becomes quite dull. Still it was risky for the shinigami. There was a high possibility he would lose his special position among the shinigami if Light was able to outsmart him. Surely the shinigami had to take this into consideration.

"But even if you don't do so I've got nothing to lose and, rest assured, you will never be able to replace me, little human. Just be warned." Light wasn't able to tell if it was an empty threat or not, but still he'd better be careful.

"Name the price" Nothing as far as Light knew came without a price especially not such a big opportunity.

"Don't be alarmed", answered the shinigami.

"The price is quite reasonable compared to what powers you will gain. I wouldn't even call it a price. You have the choice to go back to Mu and dissolve into nothing or stay here and become a shinigami. If you decide to stay you will lose all your memories and of course the transformation is quite painful. Nothing more, nothing less. It's up to you"

This shinigami was clever. It was a trap. It wasn't up to Light. It wasn't even a choice to begin with. How could Light choose Mu and become nothing? He could only choose the second option. One issue, however, still remained. How could he be Kira without his memories? As a shinigami would he still want to punish the filth of the human world? It was in his nature, after all.

"I believe you already know my answer", he replied calmly even though he was angered with the arrogance of this shinigami. He was Kira, the saviour; still this shinigami had made his choice from the very beginning. It was obvious that Light had to choose to become a shinigami given his history.

He, in fact, should be pleased how his situation turned out because otherwise he would still be rotting in Mu. Nevertheless, he hated not being able to decide on his own.

"I choose to become a shinigami, a god of death"

"Very well then", Jastin concluded.

Light fell.

This time he felt the pain as he made impact with the ground, but how? He had been floating just above it. It shouldn't have hurt, but still it did. It burned like acid, burning his skin, sending him into depth of agony. He screamed so load even his own ears hurt. Was it the fall or the dust that hurt him? His ability to think slowly decreased.

He looked at his body and saw sand. The dust had risen from the ground and consumed his whole body. It was turning him to dust as well. His body turned black from the contact; sometimes the sand even ate it away till it made contact with his bones. His clothes had been turned to ashes and he believed the same fate would befall him.

Had the shinigami lied? Had he really been naïve enough to believe such an obvious lie? It had to be one because it had been too good to be true. Now he would suffer for his actions. A chuckle.

"Listen, Light. I have another offer, more like a challenge for which I will reward you. So listen and tell me if you accept…"

He gave his answer.

Shortly after that the pain clouded his mind, his thoughts became unclear and his vision blurry. The words spoken haunted his mind. The last thing he noticed before passing out was the shinigami with his throne disappearing.

Then he was gone as well.