Disclaimer: The ideas are mine, the characters are not... I did miss spending time with them


"I'm here without you baby,

But you're still on my lonely mind."

Here without you, 3 doors down


Rubeus Hagrid was a little drunk. He felt like he had to be, to do what he was about to do, and yet he hesitated, hovering in front of Professor Snape's door, unsure about whether or not he should knock. He could have never anticipated that something like this would have happened, that he would find what he found… But now he had to do something about it. He had to give it to him. It was the decent thing to do.

The giant knocked. It was a moment before the Potions Master opened the door, and as soon as he did a mixture of scents from the potions he was brewing invaded the corridor. Rubeus got dizzy.

Snape didn't say anything. He waited for the other one to talk. He seemed displeased with the interruption.

"Heh- professor Snape, sorry fer disturbin' yeh"

Oh no... What use is it, to apologize for an interruption. No matter how sorry the grounds keeper was, the interruption was staying right there with Severus. Surely it would have been better not to interrupt at all? As if that was not rnough, the half-giant seemed to be drunk. Why on Earth did Dumbledore chose to associate with this simpleton, Severus would never understand. Could he not see that Snape was working? That he had no time to lose?

"What is it that you wish, Hagrid? Did Dumbledore sent for me?"

"Nah… I was workin' on this album fer Harry yeh see… I was puttin' together pictures o' James and Lily… 'e don' have any yeh see… I was callin' up friends, searchin' some other places,…"

Severus' blood turned to ice. Was it possible that he had come for photographs? That he wants Severus' photographs to give to Potter's son? How could he… Besides, he didn't have any.

"What you do or don't do for Potter is hardly a concern of mine."

Hagrid studied him silently for a moment. Severus couldn't quite tell what was going on in the giant's mind. It was better if he was clearer.

"If you came for photographs, I can not help you. I don't have any."

"Neh, that ain'… I jus… I found this…" he took something, a photograph out one of the pockets in he coat and handed it to the Potions masters.

Severus picked up the polaroid and examined it carefully. It was a very old photograph and it had not been well cared for. Someone had folded it twice, and the corners were disintegrating. The image had started to fade away, but it was still clear. And he remembered it. He remembered that day, all those years ago. It was a trip to Hogsmeade, a week before their Ordinary Wizardry levels. They went there together, Lily and him, as they often did, only that time, Lily insisted they had their picture taken at that photographic booth just outside the Train Station. Severus sat on the tall stool and Lily hugged him from behind, passing her arms in front of his chest.

Snape seemed to have forgotten Hagrid, standing right in front of him.

"It's yours… An' it didn' seem right to… I thought yeh might wan' to keep it."

Severus nodded slowly, unable to take his eyes from the photograph, sliding his fingers down the worn out picture.

"Eh… I will be goin' then-" Hagrid mumbled, thanking Merlin that he'd had the good sense to get drunk before all that.

"Thank you", Severus whispered.

The giant nodded and twisted on his boots to leave the dungeons, the fumes coming from inside the room made him feel like he was going to be sick.

"Hagrid," Severus called again and his voice cracked embarrassingly as the giant turned around to face him one more time, "this—album you're making. Are there any more…?"

He wanted to know if there was any more pictures of them. Rubeus probably had no idea about everything that had transpired between Lily and Severus Snape, but he was already at Hogwarts when they both attended the school. He remembered how unseparable they used to be. And after all that, after all that had happened, he didn't have any photographs. Only memories. That was said beyond Rubeus' imagination. And there was kindness and sadness in his eyes when he answered.

"Neh… I didn' fin' much. That's the only one."

Severus nodded. Rubeus turned back to leave.

When the giant walked away, Severus walked back into his office and closed the door behind him. He did move. He stood right there, allowing his back to push heavily against the door as he studied the picture.

He looked so young… His black hair waved down to his shoulders, the tips of it touching Lily's arm wrapped around his chest. Her own red curls were tied in a ponytail and from time to time his photographic self turned to her and brushed a strand of hair away from her eyes. Lily for her part squeezed him a little tighter and kissed his face. He raised his hand to hold her arm, unwillingly to let go. He had to be talked into taking that picture, as he recalled, but Lily insisted and he had never been able to say no to her. They were smiling in the photograph, forever enjoying the fact that they were young and alive and together.

Severus' knees collapsed and the Potion master slided his back down the door until his body hit the cold stone floor of his dungeon. He held his head, his elbows on his knees, and before he could restrain himself, he started crying. There he was, a wreck of a man, barely a shell of the boy he had been. He sobbed violently thinking of that day, thinking of what had happened since and of how much he had lost, of what a fool he had been. He took the picture to his beating heart and cried bitter tears for the life he had known, the life he might have had if it wasn't for so many mistakes and faults. He missed her. It had been fifteen years now, but he still missed her every single day.

And he didn't think that was ever going to change.


Author's note: Severus and Lily are my OTP... I recently read a fic in which Hagrid came to ask Sev for pictures for the album he made for Harry. In that fin, things went a bit differently, but I was inspired to write my own take on how these events transpired. I am trying to decide on whether it's better to publish several short fics or gather them all in collections... I wrote this for the Chose your Wand challenge, (Phoenix feather - Write a platonic pairing) Please review and let me know what you think