Wintertime Confessions

(A/N) This story is HEAVILY based on my first fic ever written, Three simple words. Rated T for swears, but might change to M for possible future saucyness. I hope you enjoy!

I DO NOT OWN KINGDOM HEARTS OR FINAL FANTASY

Sora's POV:

My name's Sora, and I'm living a high school drama

I'm walking down the halls from the hell that is otherwise known as my Calculus class. It's my last class of the day so I end it pissed off.

Angry thoughts spew into my mind about my teacher, but it's nothing I can't handle.

I'm a senior in high school, and things are finally starting to go my way. Despite my uphill battle with math, I have a lot of friends, good memories, and a possible future playing soccer in college. Still, I feel like I'm missing something important. Anyway, back to my brooding

Eventually, I arrive at the usual spot. Its where I can see most of my friends. It's where all of my trials and tribulations seem to be put to rest. All because of one person... You

I walk over to you; saying hi to my other friends on the way. When I get to you, you shoot me one of your signature, beautiful smiles as you hug me and say hi.

We start talking about our days. I, of course, ask you first just so I can hear your voice. Pathetic as it may be, it's the truth.

That's when my mind travels to a far away place.

A paradise that Dante himself could not imagine. A place of lush forest, majestic mountains, breath taking beaches, and most importantly, you...

However, even in the land of make believe, I'm still no prince charming.

I'm beyond a hopeless romantic, at least he can form a sentence.

All the while I'm still stumbling and stuttering just to say "never mind", or change the subject abruptly so she does the cutest thing ever and cocks her head to the side in bewilderment and scrunches her face.

In my heart I can see her true beauty. The way she crinkles her eyes when she gives me that beaming smile that I swear puts me into cardiac arrest. God, I could talk about her eyes for days. The way the seem to shine like radiant pools of light. How they can look so soft, and at the same time act like daggers that pierce through my defenses all the way to my very soul. Her hair, the way the wind blows it back and forth; so beautiful and free. She reminds me of a Cherry blossom in full bloom. Her laugh can illuminate the darkest corridors of the universe, her smile causes my heart to melt into a sweet elixir, her lips tie my vocal chords in a knot, forcing me to sputter out nonsense. All around her is an aura of happiness and beauty. When I see her my knees buckle and give into the overwhelming sensation of desire, need, and dare I say it at this age? Love.

It not just her appearances that make her beautiful, it's her mind. She can learn music in a heartbeat, and she can sing with the voice of an angel. When it comes to school, it's no contest. She can do anything she sets her mind to. She is my muse, in every sense of the word. Whenever I see her playing one of the many instruments she can wield, or reading aloud, or singing to her iPod with her friends, I find a familiar goofy grin slowly creeping on my face. At the same time, her sweet voice trickles into my ears like fresh honey.

But why? Why can't I say how I feel about you?

Why is it so easy to say when your not in front of me?

I love you. It's so simple!

Or is it?

What if she doesn't feel the same?

What if she laughs at me?

What if she pities me?

...I'm not good enough...

...She deserves better...

Slowly, my insecurities creep from the ground and latch onto me. With gnarled, clawed hands, and their yellow, accusing eyes, they pull me further and further into a bottomless pit of darkness and depression. As I fall deeper and deeper, my vision fades. The room goes to black. My skin is cold. My mind, empty. Am I dead? In a world without her I might as well be. One last image comes into my consciousness, her, smiling at me.

I finally give in and start to fall... faster... And faster.

I keep falling until I hear a voice, it's faint and muffled.

I slowly open my eyes to see the dark, emptiness of my mind. Is this really what's left of me? Is this how my life ends, wallowing in darkness? I hear the muffled voice again. Why does it sound so familiar? A loud, mysterious rumble coming from all sides of me interrupts my thoughts. I look behind me to see two large, ivory cathedral doors come into view; almost floating in the void. As I make my way towards them, they open slowly, and a beam of pure light floods the area. The white flash blinds me momentarily. My eyes begin to refocus, and colors begin to reemerge. In time, I start seeing lockers, kids in the hallway, and teachers. The muffled voice from before gets clearer and I try to listen. I can see everyone else's face, except for the person in front of me. I become more and more confused and the voice gets louder and louder. Then, I see you...

"Sora? SORA!"

"What? Oh hey!" I say as I awake from my stupor. "What's up?"

"What's up? We were talking and you said you wanted to ask me something, then you just got quiet."

Great, now she thinks Im neurotic

"Sorry I guess I must have forgot" You coward.

She crosses her arms and cocks her eyebrow In a playful manor.

"I don't buy that"

I shrug my shoulders, "It's the truth" Lies

"Well okay, see you later."

What's this? She almost looks... disappointed. But why?

A rush of emotions develop in my head. My spirit and my brain are fighting to the death as my kidneys take bets from my other shouting insides. But through all of the noise, one voice is louder then all of them. It comes from my heart and it bellows "I won't lose her!"

Who knows... Maybe this beyond hopeless romantic can be the hero for one day...

"Kairi! Wait!"

"Yeah? What is it?"

"W-well it's just that... I've been meaning to say that I..."

"Sora?"

"I like you. No, that doesn't sound right. I love you?" I shake my head, "No that's not right either. I'm in between, if that makes any sense. You're not just my friend, you're more than that. And even if against all odds you like me too, I don't think girlfriend would be the right word to describe what you are to me. You're an important person to me. A staple of my life. I think, no, I KNOW that I'm hopelessly in love with you."

She has a look of surprise and her cheeks turn red. She then puts her head down. I feel like I need to explain. It was as if everyone in the world disappeared except for me and her.

"I don't love you, it's impossible to love something without being loved back, as much as we'd like to believe that's the case. I'm in love with you because this is more than some silly high school crush or infatuation. If I see something during the day I think of what your response to it would be. I get jealous and disheartened when you talk to other guys. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't do anything without thinking about you somehow. I know that Riku broke your heart, and that's why you're so indifferent to any boy. You emotionally detach yourself to prevent yourself from getting hurt again. You're afraid of loving someone, or getting too close. But I want you to know, that you can let me in. No matter what happens beyond this point, my drive will be to make sure you're the happiest person possible. Whether that means we're together or not. Despite being the girl I'm in love with, you're still my friend and that won't change. At least to me." Feeling daring, I step closer to her, "Kairi, I just need to know. Can we be more than just friends?"

Oh man, what have I done? look at her. She's in shock. I should give her some space. Hell, maybe I should just leave. But, her head is still down, and she looks like she's...crying.

I reach out my hand to touch her shoulder but she jerks her body away and looks at me with frustrated, confused, and sad eyes.

"Don't touch me!" She snapped,

"Why? Why does it have to be you? Why now?!"

"Kairi, I just-"

"Do you have any idea how confused I am right now!? How conflicted I feel!?"

She looks at me with tears now streaming down her cheeks. Her face blushed to a blood red. Her lip quivers ever so slightly.

"So then you don't like me." My head droops down.

"No, yes, I don't know. You make me feel different than other people do. I know I can trust you with serious things, and you can cheer me up at the drop of a hat. At one point I thought I was in love with you too. But a part of me still sees a friend, and nothing more. While the other wants me to open up my heart to you." Her voice trembles, and you could physically see the internal conflict in her heart. "I don't know what to feel...I-I think I need time to think. I'm not saying yes or no until I know that I can fully support my answer 100%. Until then, I don't know, maybe we should just take some time from each other. I don't want to lose you either but I need to be alone right now."

I'm pretty confused by the series of words that came from her mouth, but it sounds vaguely positive.

"Ok, just know that I'm here whether you say yes or no" I say clinging to the last bit of hope in my body.

With that, we exchanged an awkward hug and went our separate ways. We usually walk home together, but I figured to preoccupy myself to give her a head start. I thought we both needed time to process what just happened. Not to toot my own horn, but that was a pretty detailed and heartfelt confession that apparently affected her in a way that I didn't expect. On the way to my locker, a plethora of thoughts began to buzz around my head. As I put on my coat and scarf and start to make my way home, I start to mumble them. Then, the mumbling turns into talking. Before long, I'm straight up yelling to and at myself.

"What the fuck was I thinking!?"

"What force made me think that was a good idea?"

"What are you thinking Sora? Do you think after you confess she'll magically fall in love with you and you'll live happily ever after?"

"This is the fucking real world Sora! I don't care how much you love her, you selfishly disregarded her feelings and failed to do the one thing you promised her, you made her sad."

I walked in a hurry through the snow. Each step making an almost playful crunch into the white cold powder. It's colder than I thought it would be. Maybe corduroy pants weren't the best option of clothes today. Because of my yelling and shouting to myself, I started to get weird looks from people driving along. Some parents covered the ears of their children and shot glares at me. I don't care, at least not at the moment. When I finally got home I rushed to my room. Before I closed the door I heard my mother calling

"Sora? You oka-"

WHAM! I slammed my door shut and layed face first on my bed. After a few seconds I got uncomfortable so I moved around until I was looking at my ceiling.

We now enter into the present setting. With me, hands behind my head, pondering my current situation.

What the hell have you gotten yourself into Sora? You can't just leave her alone. You said it yourself, she's afraid to fall in love. I'm not the meek, feeble Sora that came to this school 4 years ago, Kairi taught me to have confidence. Well, now's the time to be pretty freakin' confident. Because now, I only have 1 week to get her to fall in love with me. Because if she doesn't, then I'll be like all the other guys who've confessed to her. I'll be forgotten, discarded, and ignored.

As I continued to ponder, I hear a multitude of voices and whispering from my door. Annoyed, I realize that my family probably isn't used to seeing me so full of teen angst, and frustration. After waiting, I finally hear a knock, followed by a series of shh'ing, "What are you doing?", and "Aw shit! he's coming!"

"Here we friggin' go" I sigh.

I open the door to see my twin brother Roxas, his Girlfriend Naminé, My younger sister Xion, Riku my best friend and Xion's boyfriend, Ventus my older brother, Ven's girlfriend Aqua, My even older brother Squall (A.K.A "Leon"), his girlfriend Rinoa, Leon's best friend Cloud, Cloud's girlfriend Tifa, and the icing on the fucking cake, Tifa's younger sister Yuffie. Perfect. My life was now a drama with a fucking audience.

Ya know, I'm starting to wonder if all this is worth the trouble. then, I think of Kairi, the girl of my dreams, and she makes it worthwhile. So I let the crowd of people in my room. I figure, screw it. If this is the one chance I have to be with Kairi and be happy, then I'll need all the help I can get to make sure I do it right. Two weeks... It could happen. Right?

EXPLANATION TIME!

I was reading through the old version of this today and I due to my writer's block and a few new ideas based on my life, I figured why not make this into a full length story. Now, I know what you're thinking "Two stories at once!?" But you're a noob! How the hell will you keep up with that when you already update one only once a month?" Good question. I don't friggin' know, but I'll find a way. Stay tuned for this story and stay tuned to City of Keyblades and Big Shoulders.

I'll do my best for you guys!

P.S Please review and tell me your thoughts.