Jacob and Edward Death Match
Snarls erupted from everywhere.
" Eddiekinz, yoyoyo Jake bro, stop it homies!" I said.
They didn't.
"If you really loved Bella, you wouldn't have left, yo dawg." Jake sneered.
"If you really loved her, you would have stayed away!"
"You shoulda too bro yo home dawgs!"
"Yea… well I tried. I told her of the dangers and she wouldn't listen." Ed turned to me.
"You stubborn idiot." He said it in the strangest English accent.
"Yea I know honey bunzzzzzzzzzzzzz….."
" Hmmmm yes. Well she obviously loves me more!" Eddie said-ie.
That was crossing the line. Jake shuddered, and exploded.
In his place was a giant russet- brown wolf.
OH NO!
Jacob lunged for my Teddy Eddie's throat.
" Jacob, stop. I don't wanna fight you!" Ed said, as he dodged outta the way.
Jake kept lunging. After awhile, Edward started to get pissed, so he started fighting back.
"Yoyoyoyo home bros yo shouldn't fight over me. We can split up times together!" I said, panicking.
They didn't listen. Edward kicked Jake square in the chest.
Jake fell back, whimpering. He knew he had made a wrong move. He knew that it was over.
At first I couldn't believe it. Was Edward actually that mad. Would he actually kill him.
Unfortunetly, seconds later, that question was answered.
My eyes blurred.
Then Edward proceeded to rip off Jacob Black's head.
When Edward finished ripping apart Jacob, piece by piece, he turned to me. He was terrified.
Not of me I realized, just himself.
" Bella, I… I have no idea what came over me." He whispered.
Pfffft. Did he really Jake would never come back? Of course Jake would! Since he is magical, all we need is one thing…
"Sparkles." I said.
"Huh?"
"We can bring Jake back if we capture some of your sparkles that you get when you go out into the sunlight." I squealed. I wanted to see him sparkle again!
" And you know this because…?"
" Come on, we can't waste time!" I said, grabbing his arm and pulling him into a ray of sunlight. I took out a brown paper bag.
"Ummm..?"
"What? I'm prepared."
He dazzled me, but I found my point again in like ten minutes.
I opened the paper bag and held it open so sparkles could go in. When they went in, they stayed.
"Amazing!" Edward squealed.
" I know, right?" I closed the bag and went over to Jacobs pieces. Then I poured out the sparkles onto each of them.
Instantly, the pieces began moving.
It took awhile but Jake was up and breathing again!
I hugged him.
" I'm sorry Jake." Ed said.
" It's ok. I shouldn't have reacted like that. But when I died, I saw my future, and I knew that you saved me, and I know who I am supposed to be with." Jacob said.
…
" Well, I know its not me." I said.
" You are right it isn't. But I'm ok with you guys going out. Peace Love HP!" He said, and then he left.
" Oh well, at least that's over" I said.
Then me and Eddie set off, hand in hand, for a cheeseburger.
Even though she doesn't know it, I'll be with her soon.
I know it.
She is obsessed with somebody else, but soon he will be no more.
I grinned "MWHAHAHAHHAHAHHA"
And then I set off for my new loves house… Leah.
Haha. I wrote this a while ago. Don't hate me :P I have a crazy sense of humor.
Disclaimer: Don't own any characters and... yeah.
Please tell me if you like this parody 'cuz I could post more stuff like this.
And some words are spelled wrong on purpose... ;)