Disclaimer: Not mine.
Bad Days.
Her dark eyes stared softly through the window pane from the sofa, through the light pattering of the rainfall, and into something beyond. Towards something only she could see, something only she could understand. Straight caramel locks fell gently along the side of her face, accentuating her tethered youth. As she watched the dancing drizzles, she thought of today, and days to come, and even more days to come after that. Today was a hard day. But there were many more ahead, she knew.
A slight whimper from one of the heads lying in her lap beckoned her attention. She broke from the trance of the rain to glance down at the dirty blond mop on her lap. Gently, she placed her hand in his gave it a small squeeze. Grey mournful eyes from the boy thanked her for her presence. She offered him a gentle smile. He closed his eyes once again as she watched him protectively.
She turned her attention to the other head in her lap. Black silky hair spilled over the left side of her lap, its owner snoring softly. The sleeping girl's dress was barely visible under the blanket previously tucked gently around her.
Satisfied that both children in her lap were both okay for now, the caramel locked girl glanced up across the other side of the coffee table just a few feet away where another little boy was draped over the love seat fast asleep with one shoe untied. His dark skin was hidden underneath his suit jacket to keep out the light. She gave a small sigh in his direction.
The girl's eyes shifted to the left where yet another boy slouched back in a large recliner that towered over him. His suit was wrinkled from the day's mournful events. His hands were folded neatly in his lap, his thumbs twiddling softly. He looked up. Their dark eyes met. No words were spoken. There was no need to speak. A bond of understanding omitted the need for verbal communication. Because today was a bad day.
Her name was Kim. She was a smallest person in her grade. She loved butterflies and blue skies and her friends. She was ten. And she felt old. She felt there wasn't much to her life. There was gymnastics. A passion she couldn't share with many people. There was karate, which she joined to socialize with Jason. And there was school, which she didn't attend today. Because today it was raining. Today it was gloomy. Today, they had to dress up nice for an event that wasn't nice at all.
Because today was a bad day.
Earlier today she had been running. She was chasing the blond mophead in her lap. His name was Billy. He was running. From a white casket drowned in flowers and pictures. He was running from his mother. And she would not let him escape.
He'd fled from his father's grasp underneath the safety of the umbrella into the nearby woods. Away from the crowd. Away from the mourning. Away from his friends. Away from his mother. He didn't care where he ended up. He wanted to leave it all behind.
Kim had been a good ten feet from him the whole way. She wouldn't let him leave her sight. She silently cursed her black dress shoes as they hurt when she dug her feet into the ground to gain traction. She risked a quick glance over her shoulder. The three others followed another ten yards behind. When she turned forward, she saw that he'd gained more speed. She didn't struggle too hard to keep up with his pace.
Billy had run so deep into the woods. He didn't care. His legs hurt. He didn't care. His heart hurt. He didn't care. He was mad – no, wait, he was sad – wait – he didn't know what he felt. He just knew didn't like it. He hated it. He hated the world. He hated today.
He would've kept running if the creek before him hadn't been there. He slowed to a stop, panting hard. He grabbed at his chest, begging God for mercy, begging for things to change, to rearrange. He bent over and cried out. He let himself slide to the floor against a thick tree, resting his head atop his small knees.
Kim had stopped a solid ten feet away to watch him, giving him space. She panted softly as the others finally caught up. She glanced back at the tallest one, Jason. Their eyes met, and he nodded. She headed slowly towards Billy, leaving three of them behind.
The dark boy, Zack, was going to follow her until Jason held out a hand gently refraining him from joining her. He nodded silently and glanced back at Trini, her dark hair slightly misted from the rain. She blinked and nodded in understanding. The trio watched silently as Kim approached their fallen friend.
Billy was huddled against the tree with his head down hugging his knees. She'd stopped just a few feet away from him, shuffling the autumn leaves to let him know she was there. When he didn't move, she sat down next to him silently and mimicked his position, knees drawn up to her chest, turning her head to watch him.
He didn't move.
Moments passed before he lifted his head slightly towards her, revealing tear-stained cheeks beneath his glasses. She stared back understandingly and said nothing. He opened his mouth as if searching for words. Nothing came out. She waited patiently. He blinked and sighed. His mouth opened again and this time he spoke.
"Does the hurting ever stop?" he whispered so quietly, so painfully, she could barely hear it. His voice was strained as the tears started flowing from his eyes once again. Kim didn't break her protective gaze.
"I don't know," she replied honestly, gently. He was now openly bawling. She clutched an arm around his neck and pulled him into a hug. He buried himself in her arms and sobbed openly. "I don't know," she repeated as she felt the tears well up in her eyes. "I think it's always going to hurt. But I also think it'll get easier."
"I love my mom," he sobbed in her arms.
"I know you do." The rain was falling less. "She loves you and your daddy more than anything in the world," Kim stated boldly.
"You mean 'loved', Kimmy," Billy replied mournfully through his sobs. "She loved me and my daddy."
"No," the young girl said firmly. "She loves you and your daddy." She felt him hold her tighter and she returned the fierceness of the hug. "Love like what your mommy has can't die."
"How do you know?" he asked.
"I know these things, Billy." He loosened his grip and looked up into her eyes, as though searching for truth. She stared back, her dark eyes expressing the wisdom of a thousand centuries. "She loves you," Kim stated again, more boldly. And he believed her.
"I miss my mom!" he cried out. "I don't have a mom…"
She was crying as well now. Between soft sobs, she'd said so softly he couldn't hear, "Me neither."
A gentle arm wrapped around her. She looked up to see Trini's fallen face, tears already freely flowing. Kim pulled Trini into the embrace, and Billy welcomed her. Kim looked up from the pile to Jason, who was fighting the urge to break down. Zack was behind him, his head in one of his hands. All Kim could do to help was to hold the two of them in her arms as they cried.
It was a good few minutes before Jason spoke up. He bent down towards Billy, touching his shoulder softly. "We need to head back," he stated gently. Billy turned towards his friend and sniffled. "When you're ready."
"Okay," Billy sniffled and sighed. Jason helped Billy and Trini up and put an arm around Billy protectively. Zack took his other side, repeating the gesture of friendship. Kim took Trini's hand and squeezed it.
That's how they exited the woods. Together.
Billy's father had been waiting at the edge of the woods, knowing they'd return with his son. William knew their bond was special. He'd promised his wife, long before she passed, that he'd embrace their friendship. She was right, he thought agonizingly and proudly. She always was. He held his arms out at the sight of his son. Zack and Jason had released their hold on Billy to let him run to his father, as he accepted the embrace with gratitude and tears.
And now, hours later, they lay scattered across the family room of the Cranston household. Billy and Trini were asleep with their heads in Kim's lap, Zack sprawled across the loveseat, and Jason sitting in the recliner, his eyes glued to Kim's understandingly.
The mournful hustle and bustle of the funeral reception seemed appropriate for their situation. Their parents had left them the living room to themselves, to sleep and mourn peacefully. The death of a loved one is something they knew their children were struggling to cope with, especially Billy. But they had each other, and so long as the bond was strong, they would survive.
Kim broke her gentle stare from Jason and turned her gaze back to the window pane, where it was still drizzling softly. Jason held back a sigh when she turned away. There were things going on in her head he didn't understand. He knew he wasn't meant to; he was meant to do other things. But sometimes, and he couldn't explain why, he felt the strong urge to look after her. Like she needed it, even if she couldn't admit it or know it. She was the smallest of their group, but so often he felt she was the strongest.
He was right though. Heavy thoughts burdened Kim's small shoulders. She felt alone. She'd do anything and everything in the world to put the sun back in Billy's sky, but she couldn't. This was something she couldn't fix, she knew. This was something he needed to learn to cope with. But she understood. She knew what it was like to have no mother.
Unlike Billy's mom, Kim's mother was not dead. But she may as well have been. Long gone were the days of kisses and hugs in her own household. Kim's family was rich. But money was something Kim would've traded for just one look from her own her mother that Billy or Jason's mom gave them.
As for her father, well, he was another story.
She had long ago accepted that her home life was not the same as her friends'. She'd long known that she was neither as pretty as Trini, smart as Billy, nor as successful as Jason or Zack. She was the runt of their group. And for it, unbeknownst to her, she'd grown stronger in ways children are not meant to. She was built to endure the very heartaches she was determined to protect her friends from.
Because she loved her friends so dearly, she would do anything for them.
Even die.