You're my mother.
There, I said it.
I imagine that the title isn't something you ever considered for yourself. I don't think you see yourself as a mother. It is a responsibility that you never saw for yourself. You are too independent, and motherhood, for you, are shackles that keep you down. Or maybe it is something you have wanted, but are afraid. Maybe you believe yourself unfit to be a mother. How could you ever help shape a life? Is that what you think to yourself?
Whichever reason, it explains how you are around me. You don't act like my friends' mothers. You don't treat me like I'm stupid or always guilty or that just because I am not as old as you, I must not have something to say. I've seen my friends struggle to tell their parents something, only to be ignored over and over until it is too late. And only after the fact do they come to my friends and apologize.
But you never do that to me. You might think I'm a little strange, not like you, but you don't act like this is a bad thing. Despite my attitudes and experiences being different from yours, you have welcomed them, learned from them, as I have learned from you.
I can talk to you about things, things that no one else in this world can understand. You trust me, not just with little things, but with big things as well, and in return I have trusted you with the biggest secrets of my life, even if they are rather small. Just yesterday, after I got an A on my geometry test, i wanted to call you and share the news. Its silly...what would someone like you, with some many other important things going on, care about some minor test. But if I had called you, I know you would have been happy for me.
I know dad and you fight. I'm not blind or stupid. But I hope you realize, deep down, just how much he enjoys those fights. You keep him grounded keep him from getting a swelled head. Grams does the same thing, but I think its different with you. I've seen the chemestry between both of you (something I honsetly shouldn't be thinking about when I think about my dad), but part of that is the friction that causes the two of you to bicker. But I can see the caring underneath it.
Too many times my father has brought women into our lives, never for long but still, and each of them have never been a mother to me. They haven't even been a friend. I was viewed as a decoration, no different than a painting you would hang in the hall. My dad knows this, and that's why he never allowed them to get close to me, and in part himself.
But you and him share a bond...I've seen it. Even when you drive each other insane, I see it.
It is all these reasons that I have sent you this. Its a necklace...my school was selling them. Daughters buy them for their mothers, the little heart charms, and snap them in half. I have my half...and I am giving you the other. I know it isn't something you would wear normally, and maybe you find it a bit tacky...
The point is, I am going to wear my half. And if you wear yours, and if you are ever feeling sad or alone...I hope you look down and see it, and know that you have a daughter that loves you very much, and could not ask for a better mother.
Love,
Alexis
^&^&^&^
Castle frowned as he sat down. "What do you got there?"
Quickly sliding the letter into her desk, the charm and necklace still dangling from her fingers, Beckett turned to her partner.
"A gift." She said with a slight smile, turning so he couldn't see her tears as she put it on, letting the half a heart rest against her mother's ring. 'from our daughter'