Call of the Simpsons
By JennaWrites
Chapter 1: The Adventure Begins
One sunny afternoon, Homer was resting in the hammock.
Homer sighed, "Ahh, what perfect day. It's just my hammock, a duff, and me.
No work. No boy (Bart). But most importantly, no Flanders".
"Did you call my name neighboroonie?" Flanders asked on the other side of the fence. Homer complained, "Doh! Stupid Flanders! Now my afternoon is ruined!"
Flanders said "Well Homer, not meaning to be such a bother but…"
"Too late", Homer replied.
"But shouldn't you be at work today?" Flanders asked.
Then Homer got up, thinking of an excuse why he isn't at work.
"Uhh… my boss is sick today, so work was cancelled".
"Aww, what a shame", Flanders said feeling bad for Homer's boss, Mr. Burns.
"Well could tell your boss for me to feel better? See ya".
Homer laid back on the hammock, and Homer muttered "Pftt, right up my…"
Flanders then came back and added, "Oh, by the way Homer, would you like to come to watch me help tearing down the church, I'm bringing the crane there?"
"You, tearing the church? HA! Ya, right Flanders. The church is your soul!" Homer joked.
"Well, actually, we're only tearing down a portion of the church so we can build a much larger addition, that way we'll have more room for the homeless and alcoholics," said Flanders.
"Stupid Flanders, helping the ones in need." Homer muttered.
"So would you like to come?" asked Flanders.
"Oh, Flanders, I'd love to, but I have a tight schedule today." Homer said acting sorry he couldn't come.
Homer thought of his plans "Eat, sleep, have a duff, sitting on my a-s-s watching TV, and then eat and sleep some more".
"Well I don't blame you, I bet you're a hard worker. You'd probably be pooped after today" replied Flanders.
Homer got up to his feet and angrily "Are you calling me lazy!"
"No Homer, I'm not calling you…" said Flanders.
"After all I've done for you? I have a mug that says 'World's Greatest Neighbor', but now you're insulting me!" Homer shouted.
"Homer! You're misunderstood me!" said Flanders.
"Well, I'll prove I'm not lazy. I'll do two hundred push-ups everyday. Heck, I'll even drive your stupid crane to church!" stated Homer.
Homer jumped over the fence into Flanders's driveway.
Then he got into the crane, and Flanders ran over to him and asked "Homer, wait! Are you sure you know how to operate this type of machinery?"
Homer replied, "Don't be such a wimp Flanders! Of course I know. It's easy as riding a tricycle. You just have to learn that everything isn't that hard".
Then Homer accidentally pushed the gear forward while he was talking to Flanders, and the crane jerked forward, speeding into the street.
Homer was startled, but acting like he meant to drive the crane out of the driveway at amazing speed. "See, Flanders, there's nothing to it!"
"Homer, look out!" shouted Flanders.
Homer turned his head around and saw that he was speeding towards a woman taking her baby on a walk in a baby carriage.
"Ahhhhh!" Homer screamed.
Luckily, Homer turned the crane in another direction, missing them.
Then the crane started to spin uncontrollably down the street.
Homer yelled "Flanders, HELP!"
Homer kept trying to stop the crane from spinning by turning a different direction after each second.
Finally the crane went smoothly straight again.
"Whew," Homer said relieved.
Then Homer looked up and realized that the crane was now speeding towards his house.
Homer shrieked "Ahhhhhhh!"
"Homer! You have to push the red handle foward in order for the crane to stop!" shouted Flanders.
Homer quickly found the red handle and pushed it foward.
The crane made a sharp stop at least two feet away from the house.
"Whew, that was close," Homer said in relief.
But because of the sudden stop, the wrecking ball swung forward, and crashed into the house.
"DOH!" said Homer.
Homer climbed out of the crane to see how bad the house was damaged.
The wrecking ball crashed through all of the family's bedrooms.
"Oh no! What do I do, what do I do, what do I do!" Homer said apprehensively.
Then Homer said more calming to himself "Don't panic Homer. It's not all that bad. Marge and the kids aren't home yet from the grocery store, and insurance can take care of the damages."
Then Homer saw a letter on the ground and said "Hey, what's this," Homer asked.
He opened the letter and read it.
Then he screamed "MY HOUSE INSURANCE IS EXPIRED!"
Homer fainted, and then he was in a fetal position, shivering in fear.
"So that's why those letters kept coming in," he said nervously.
Then he got up and said to himself "Okay, so there is no help from insurance, but at least Marge and the kids aren't home yet".
"Uh, Homer, isn't that your family driving up our street", Flanders asked.
Looked up and saw Marge driving down the street in her station wagon.
"Aahhhhhh!" Homer shrieked.
"Oh, Marge is going kill me! Or much worse, DIVORCE ME!" Homer said all panicky, "I can't let her see the house!"
Homer ran towards the car, and then leapt in front of it.
Marge and kids saw Homer and screamed "Aaaahhhh!"
Homer screamed too "Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh!"
Homer fell to the ground, and frozen in terror.
Then the car stopped suddenly.
Homer got up from the ground and said, "Uh, hi."
"Homer! What in the world were you thinking!" Marge said.
"Uh, uh…" Homer said nervously.
"And why do you look so nervous Homer?" asked Bart.
"Uh, uh…" Homer said.
Homer suddenly had an idea, he said, "The Simpsons are going camping!"
The kids cheered "Yay!"
Marge said in glee "That's great Homie, when?"
Homer said "Uh, right now!"
"But shouldn't we pack?" Lisa asked.
"I already packed for you," Homer said.
"Okay then, we'll go get it," Marge said as her and the kids were about to get out of the car.
"NO!" Homer screamed in terror, "Uh, I mean I'll get it."
Homer went inside the half demolished house get what was left in there. Then he came back with the luggage and the cat and the dog and entered the car.
"We're bringing SLH (Santa's Little Helper) and Snowball II with us?" Marge asked.
"Uh, of course. Kennels are expensive, and Grandpa is so old school." Homer answering Marge's question.
"Hey! I'm not old school!" said Grandpa.
(We see Grandpa wearing clothes that was hip when he was a kid).
"So which campsite are we going to Dad?" asked Lisa.
"Uh… why don't you choose honey."
"Well I always wanted to go to Indian Rock. It's a has a great activities, and it's a national landmark."
Homer said "Then Indian Rock it is."
Homer floored it and the adventure begins.
"Is just me, or did I see some smoky mist outside by our house?" asked Bart.
"Uh, uh… why are we listening to this Old MacDonald crap? Now here's some real music." Homer said.
Homer popped out the Maggie's Old MacDonald CD, and popped in a Rolling Stones CD.
Maggie glares at Homer.
"Hey, there's no one else complaining, sister," Homer said to Maggie.