This is one of my more InfiniteDark-stories (which means there is much pain in it). No cannon carachters are involved.

We've got TWO main characters, a female and a male. There WILL be love, in many ways. Although it's forbidden by a certain someone.

But you can't forbid love, can you?

I don't own SGA or the Wraith. Although all of the characters were spawned by me.

Please note that this story hasn't got anything to do with the universe/ways of Claustrophobia. This is another analysis of the Wraith system.

Please read and review, I need support. Let me know you're here.

Prologue

Love… there has been much said about love, much more than I'll ever understand or perhaps feel. And yet. I can't understand even a bit about this emotion, how it seems to consume the hearts of others. I have never felt love, and I have never been felt for. Therefore, there shall be no such emotion within my realm, it will be banished and replaced with logic. I will use men to reproduce, and I expect you to do the same. If you disobey my direct order then I shall show no mercy, for this is the way I am.

I remember how she used to walk across the scene, etching every single word deep into our minds. We were sisters and daughters of this cold creature, she was our host and kept us in warm clothes as long as we gave her new soldiers. And she knew. She knew that some of us were longing for men in other ways, she could see us think it, see the way we secretly looked upon mankind. We were born and raised to feel no love, and yet none of us was as cold as she was. Even if our bodies were more worth to her than the bodies of her soldiers, they would offer us no freedom. We were doomed the moment we took our first breath, doomed to become nothing more but reproduction tools in her hands.

I was the only one who dared to hate her. I was the one who was beaten in front of the others to keep them from becoming like me. But did that silent me in any way? No. That wasn't what put me to silence. That wasn't what put a gag on me.

The day came. The hunger came. My body changed in so many ways, all of a sudden I was a woman. A young, beautiful woman. And the queen knew what I was capable of, she could feel my strong aura pushing against her own. I had to be undone.

How old was I? Not even twenty years old. A thin female with small breasts, long, curly white hair and emerald green eyes. That evening I was hungrier than I had ever been, but she refused to give me access to any kind of food. I was mad, worse than ever before. How could she do that to me? For pleasure? Sadistic pleasure? I wished to spit at her face, and she felt it. My despise against her was rising, and she felt so. She knew. And she smiled within my head.

Calm down, child. Soon you will know that love does no good.

I should had known that she starved me for a reason. I became weak. I wasn't able to make anything to stop them. When they first brought me into one of the small cells, those used for enemies and captives, I thought it was because of my rage. I was so wrong. I couldn't get out, I threw myself at the door, but got nowhere. My panic took almost all of my last energy. I was pleading for her to let me out, but she wasn't listening to me anymore. And I disgraced myself by crying, tons and tons of tears.

Then they came.

I barely remember them. There was at least five of them. I can't understand them, and I despise them because I have to. Because if I won't despise them, if I won't hate them, then I won't have anything left within. Their hands stole all of my body, I forced myself to believe I wasn't there, I forced myself to believe my body wasn't mine. What I felt didn't have anything to do with me. It was like using a sharp knife to slice my soul to pieces, to cut away all of the disgust.

I hate her for what she did to me that day. I hate her for what she made them do. She forced me to reject myself. And I did. I lost pieces of myself, I sacrificed my sexuality that day. Perhaps similar to the way she had.