A/N: Okay, this is just a little fluff and ridiculousness that I thought of awhile ago and never posted. Until now, that is, as I'm having trouble jump starting my newest story. Lots of people combine fan fics, or so I have read, and I've seen ONE that's combined these two bases… But I don't' think I've seen ANY that combine them in this manner. So we'll see where it goes from here, and hope that it works out. I'm hoping for something really funny and sweet. Kind of like a LOST IN TRANSLATION thing. This is for Buffy fans as well, namely Spike fans, like me…

Point Place, Wisconsin, 1979

How the bloody hell did I end up here? Spike wondered, looking at the scenery around him. Sure, he knew that he split town when he found Dru with yet ANOTHER man, but he lost track of how long he'd driven for. He must have, because he was in someplace called Point Place, Wisconsin. I drove from New York City to Wisconsin and didn't even notice it? I must be pissed off, he thought, and looked up at the moon. Sure, he'd stopped to rest during the day a couple times to sleep and avoid the sun, but it all blurred together. Those random gas stops should have tipped me off. Oh well, he thought, parking his car in the middle of the town. I could use a drink anyway. And maybe have a feed while I'm at it.

Since it was Wisconsin, Spike saw a bar right away, and sauntered on in. People turned and stared, but then averted their eyes because it wasn't polite to stare. He smirked a little, it's as if they've never seen a punk before. Of course, he wouldn't have been surprised if they hadn't. And ever since Sid sodding Vicious died that February, Spike was thinking about a change in look anyway, so it was nice to go out with a bang. He sat at the bar, and raised a hand.

"What can I get for you?" the man asked.

"Guinness," Spike said. The man nodded, looking somewhat intimidated, and Spike lit a cigarette. This could be a nice, quiet, relaxing pit stop before I head on back to the Big Apple, he thought. Just drink my beer, maybe grab a truck driver on the way out, for the road, and then start the long drive back. I'll probably forgive Dru, it's what I do. It's in my nature, after all.

"Where are you from?" the bartender asked. Spike took a drag, and smirked.

"I'm from London," he said, exhaling. "But lately I'm from New York City."

"That's a long ways away, how'd you end up here?"

"Spat with the lady, just started driving," Spike said, taking a gulp of beer.

"Ah yes. We get a lot of lonely hearts in here," the bartender said. "In fact, here comes one of our more recent fits of that description." Spike turned, and saw a small, skinny, wide eyed brunette enter the bar. She looked to be about nineteen. Nineteen and already drinking her problems away, that's really sad, Spike thought. Though he was a cold blooded mass murdering vampire, he could, on occasion, feel pity. And he most certainly did for this young woman who entered the bar. Even if she did look somewhat appetizing all the while.

She walked to the bar, sat down, and rested her chin on her hand. She didn't even seem to notice the scary punk with bleached hair sitting next to her. She was in her own little world.

"What'll it be tonight, Miss Burkhart?" the bartender asked. She shrugged.

"Pina colada, I guess," she said, and put her purse on the bar.

"Okay," he said, and went to prepare it.

Spike was good at reading people. And just by looking at her he could tell that she used to be completely care free. Judging by her outfit, she had money. Probably just out of high school, and didn't go to college because she was just raised to find a man and get married. Which she obviously didn't find, and was now alone in a bar, with those dull eyes. Those dull multi colored eyes…

"Here you are," the bartender said, setting a drink in front of her. She accepted, and began to drink it. She stared into space as she did.

"Here's hoping it snows," she said, raising her glass. Spike really couldn't take his eyes off of her, she was very intriguing. What makes a rich girl so goddamn sad?

"I'll cover that," Spike heard himself saying, and her eyes darted to him as she drank. "Hi, I'm Spike." She put her drink down, and put on a strong, contrary face.

"Ew, sorry, I don't talk to punks," she said. "And I don't need anyone to pay for me, especially someone who looks like he can't afford to comb his hair much less buy a girl a drink."

DAMN she's spunky, Spike thought. She'd be downright obnoxious if she wasn't… Hell, she IS downright obnoxious!

"Fine, no skin off my nose, love," Spike said, finishing his Guinness. "Just trying to be nice, s'all."

"Well thanks, but I don't need anyone being nice to me," she said. "How come every stranger I meet just takes a look at me and decides that they should be nice to me? Do I look that pathetic?" She did, but he wasn't going to say it.

"Suit yourself," Spike said, bitterly, and ordered another beer.

"So what's your story?" the bartender asked him as he poured another Guinness. Spike raised his cigarette, and smirked a little in his emotional pain and anger.

"It's pretty fucking dismal," he said. "So I get home from a rock show one night, and go into the bedroom to see my bird, and sure enough, there she is. In bed with another man." The girl snorted, and Spike chose to ignore her.

"I demand to know what's going on, and Dru (my bird) says 'Spike, I need some space. You're too CLINGY.' Can you believe that? She called me clingy!" The girl groaned, and huffed a little bit. Spike looked over at her, and she was still drinking that colada.

"I say 'how am I clingy? Because I want a monogamous relationship?' And she says 'I don't want that kind of commitment!' We've been together for years, and I mean YEARS, and she decides she doesn't want a commitment!" He was getting irritated just talking about it. "So I grabbed some things, got my car, and hit the road." He left out that he had killed someone and stolen said car, and that he and Dru had been together for nearly one hundred years. And that the other man was actually a demon with an exceedingly long tongue, which was probably why she picked him up in the first place.

"I have that beat," the girl said. Spike looked over at her. "I have that WAAAAAAAY beat."

"Oh yeh, ten bucks says you don't," Spike said. She laughed a little, and threw ten bucks on the table.

"You're on!" she said, haughtily.

"Go on, then, tell me a sob story," he sneered, setting down ten dollars as well. She drank more colada, and then turned to face him.

"I had been dating MY lover for a while. My first boyfriend was one of his best friends, and that guy cheated on me all the time. When he ditched me to go to California I got together with Steven. Steven and I HATED each other before that. Well, I had a crush on him, but we fought all the time. I was too cheerleader, or whatever, and he was too poor," she said. Spike held in a laugh, she was very brash. "But we got together, and we'd been dating for awhile, and I fell in love with him. I fell so hard…. Anyway, I began asking him when we were going to get married. He would NOT commit to me. We broke up for a little while, but got back together, and THEN I got offered a job in Chicago to do my own TV show. My own FREAKING TV show!

"But I didn't want to leave Steven. So I told him that I was going to take the job unless he could tell me we had a future together. Well, he didn't get back to me, so I assumed we had broken up. I went to Chicago, and my ex (my first ex, not Steven, Michael), and I almost did it because I was so heartbroken. But at the VERY LAST MINUTE I said no to him. But as luck would have it, Steven had come to PROPOSE to me. And he saw Michael, didn't wait for an explanation, and left."

"That is rough, but-," Spike began.

"Hold on!" she said, covering his mouth. "Not finished! So I come back here, because I was so distraught at my job they fired me. ME. Jackie Burkhart got fired!"

"I'm sorry to hear that, but I still-."

"Still not done!! So Steven comes back, and I tell him that I didn't do anything with Michael, and I want another chance. I admitted that I was wrong, and I don't do that often!! So he says 'well Jackie, I'm just not ready to get married'. And then who shows up at the door?"

"Who?" Spike asked, taking a vaguely interested drag off his cigarette.

"His WIFE." Spike was genuinely caught off guard, and coughed the smoke out. "Yeah. Apparently in Vegas in a drunken stupor he married a STRIPPER. So now we don't talk without fighting, I'm alone, without a glamorous job, stuck in this Cow Town." After a moment of silence, Spike moved the money to her. She squealed a little bit, and bounced in her seat. "Thank you!"

"You knew her story was better, didn't you?" Spike asked the bar tender. He just smirked, and went to tend other customers. "Yeh, thanks for the warning, mate!" He turned to the girl on the stool, who was putting the money away in her purse.

"Though to be fair the marriage wasn't legal, she had another husband," Jackie said. "She left him. But then she came back with a divorce, because she 'loves Steven' or whatever. So I still win this little bet."

"So your name is Jackie," Spike said. She nodded, and began counting the money she had all together. "And I can tell that you like money."

"Well, who doesn't?" she asked, and put her purse away. "Don't non committed lovers suck?" Spike nodded.

"I'll drink to that," he said. They clinked glasses, and she smiled at him happily.

"FINALLY someone to talk to about this," she said. "My friends are friends with Steven, so they try to remain 'unbiased' or whatever. Too bad they just end up making me feel like an idiot. You haven't though, and you gave me money, so you have more points than they do right now." Spike chuckled, and shrugged.

"Well, you know," he said. "Everyone needs to vent sometimes. So what is there to do in this town?"

"Psh. Nothing. Get high, get drunk, go to the water tower," she said. "I would say go to the record store and listen to music, but Steven owns that place. So NO."

"I could use a new Sex Pistols album," Spike said, thinking out loud.

"Well I could use a new ABBA album, but I'm NOT about to go in there by myself," she said. "His stupid skanky girlfriend is always in there listening to music. And she'd probably accuse me of stalking him. Even if I was just in need of a new record!" Spike put out his cigarette.

"Yeh, that's rough," he said, and then she got a very happy and bitchy look on her face.

"You're named Spike, right?" she asked. He nodded, wary. "Okay, Spike. Let's go to the record store."

"Excuse me?"

"I want a new ABBA and you want a new Sex Pistols or whatever," she said. "If I don't have to go alone, maybe I could do it!"

"Oh ho no, I'm not going to be a ringer for a new boyfriend," he said, and she swatted his shoulder. "Ow-."

"You are NOT being my new boyfriend!" she snapped. "I'm off men for awhile. My last relationship was just AWFUL."

"Steven?"

"No, our friend Fez. Don't ask."

"His name is Fez?"

"I just need someone to help me get my new ABBA album!" she said, ignoring his question about Fez.

"Forget it!" Spike said. "Grow a spine, woman!"

"I'll give you your ten dollars back."

"You act like I'm a mercenary."

"You're punk! Therefore you're poor!" He was about to go off on how that was stereotypical, but she was right, he was strapped for cash at the moment. He groaned, and nodded. She squealed, and clapped her hands together.

"Okay! This is going to be great! GOD I want that album so bad!" she said, paying for hers and his drinks and grabbing his arm. "JEEZE you're cold! Do you want my scarf?"

"No thanks," he said. Not only did he not have a body temperature, but her scarf was bright pink. "Fine, let's get this over with."

"You get your nasty punk music too, so don't get all pissy!" she demanded as she paid. She certainly was bossy. He would have thought 'I see why he dumped her', but there was something else about her that was almost irresistible. She was extremely tough in her own way, but also had a vulnerability he liked. Especially in his potential victims… She knew what she wanted and she would usually get it. And when she didn't, that's when the bar runs would happen. She had a fire that was slowing dulling. She was infuriating and yet extremely appealing. 'How could he dump her?' was what he ended up thinking as he followed her out into the chilly winter night.

A/N 2: Clearly this is pre-soul Spike, no time travel needed as he's been around forever. For those unfamiliar with him, he's probably one of the more intriguing characters in the BuffyVerse. I hope this is a good start. I do enjoy a good crossover!