Memoirs of a Gaara
October Third, 4:58 a.m.
I mournful to the fact I opened my eyes this morning and I was once again alone. Why am I so lonely? I looked about the room for any sign of life. But alas, there was none. I bowed my head in sorrowful silence.
Then I became angry. Obviously everyone was too busy giving flowers and hanging out with that green bean Lee to come say hello to poor little Gaara. Oh, how I despise Rock Lee. PURE HATRED!!!
So I did the only thing there was to do, I decided to kill him. As I walked about through Konoha, I couldn't help but notice the marry scenes of delight that played out around. Small school children all hugging each other, little dogs licking people, it all disgusts me.
As I continued, a small female child appeared in front of me. She was holding a petite purple flower in his child like hands.
"Hello sir, you look blue, could you like a flower?" she piped. This was obviously an attempt to defy me. She was mocking me. NO ONE MOCKS GAARA! I smashed her in the face with my gourd. How I love my gourd. It is my only friend. It is the only thing I can talk to, the only thing I can trust, the only thing that holds, sand. I love sand also. I love to look at it, feel it, taste it!
Calm down Gaara, don't get emotional. Anyways, I was trying to get through the freaking city without making a scene, so I just left the mangled child twitching in the street. I turned a corner to a street bordered by rows of shops. All of the shop owners began to whisper to each other about me.
I heard them say how handsome I looked and how round my gourd was. I blushed. But then I realized their true intent. They were all making fun of me. They all hated me.
"CAN'T YOU SEE ALL I NEED IS LOVE?" I called to the heavens. Everyone stared at me with confusion. I took off away from them to a tree. Yes, a tree. Trees are good. I climbed the tree and stood upside down from one of the branches. It makes me feel talented when I do that.
A group of young school children came waddling past. Of course they stopped to marvel at my achievement. They complimented how cool I was. But I could see through them. They weren't complimenting me. Obviously cool meant cold, which is not hot, which means I am not hot.
"I AM NOT UGLY!" I cried leaping from the tree and latching onto their heads. Within minutes, they were no more. That's what they get for messing with Gaara. After that I just stood there trying to remember what it was I was supposed to be doing. That's when I remembered, I was going to kill that Lee guy. Lucky for me, my antics had put me right in front of the hospital.
I entered the brightly lit lobby and surveyed. I was surrounded by dozens of snotting and dribbling sick people in chairs waiting. I averted my gaze and approached the lady behind the desk.
"Hello." She said in a kind tone. "What's your name?"
"Your words are poison." I cried. "You will all pay for this!" I yelled going nuts. I'd rather not describe the rest, it was pretty graphic. As I looked at the corpses on the floor I remembered how sad I was that no one loved me. The dead bodies were just a reminder of the no friends I have, so I destroyed them again.
Once I was finished I made my way to Lee's room. It was time. As I entered I saw practically everyone featured in the series partying with him. Even Lord Orichamaru was there.
"Why wasn't I invited?" I asked weakly.
"Oh, it's him." Groaned Naruto. Everyone rolled their eyes and began throwing insults at me.
"Just go cry in the corner like a good little boy." Commanded Sasuke. I always listen to Sasuke, so I did as I was told. But as I wept, everyone else began partying. Who knows, maybe I am more popular than I think. Maybe them insulting me was their way of accepting me into their group.
I immediately jumped to my feet and began to do the worm.
"Wow Gaara! That's awesome!" everyone exclaimed. They liked me! They really liked me! But wait, did I sense a hint of sarcasm in Shikamaru's voice? Why was Ino so giggly? Why the hell am I telling you all this stuff. SCREW THIS!