The Great Banana Split Caper
By: CrystallicSky
Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown or any of its characters, nor do I make any money by writing this. I just do it for fun! XD
Warnings: Ridiculousness, hilarity, and overall silliness.
Jack Spicer had just had a rough day.
He had participated in an excess of Showdowns throughout the day, ended up the victor in only one of those, and in the very next Showdown that occurred, he'd lost the Wu he'd won in the previous.
Rough day.
He was sore all over and had just now gotten home, the hour approaching midnight but not yet there, and without even taking the time to greet his lover with more than an acknowledging grunt, he made a beeline for the kitchen.
He could really use a banana split right now...
Chase Young saw the boy barely recognize his presence and followed him in quiet concern.
Meanwhile, Jack dragged a tub of ice cream from the refrigerator and dropped it upon the counter as he reached in the cupboard for a bowl, caring less and less about making the loud noise the action caused by the minute.
The goth grabbed a spoon from the drawer and tried to stab it into the icy vanilla only to be met with a very unfortunate surprise: the ice cream was frozen near solid, and while this wouldn't be much of a problem for the average person, it was for Jack, as he hadn't the arm-strength to force the spoon into the ice cream and scoop some out.
The brilliant solution of his exhausted, genius mind?
Stab at it with the spoon until something good happens.
He enacted the plan immediately and began shanking the ice cream repetitively with slight grunts of effort, grunts that became pathetic whimpers as nothing good happened which became a long pleading whine as nothing continued to happen.
After a day like he'd had, he deserved the ice cream, and it denied him? Why, God, why?
"Spicer, you are an idiot," Chase said from behind him, plucking the spoon (beginning to bend from its improper use) from his grip and nudging him aside. "Let me do it for you."
Jack could do no more than give an, "Uh," of gratitude as he shuffled off to retrieve the other necessary components of the treat he so desperately wanted: whipped cream, chocolate sauce, maraschino cherries, and of course, the banana.
The warlord watched from the corner of his eye as his lover dazedly collected these things and put them on the counter beside the bowl that he was filling up with ice cream. Jack was entirely out of it, he deduced, clearly a result of his extremely bad day.
In that case, the man decided, he would just have to wake him up with a little amusement...
The goth flinched violently as his beloved suddenly exclaimed, "Where's the banana?!"
He blinked slowly, as if he were just waking up before pointing to the obvious banana upon the counter right next to Chase.
Golden eyes glared at him, making the youth swallow hard and want to step backwards in fear. "And why did you not tell me the banana was there before all of the ice cream was in the bowl, Spicer?"
"It was there, like, the whole time," he muttered. "Why didn't you notice it?"
Internally, Chase smirked as his lover was brought further out of his dazed state while he externally scowled, announcing, "Now the banana split is ruined!" He grasped the albino's shoulders and shook him lightly, demanding, "What are we going to do now, Spicer?! What the hell are we going to do now?!"
Wide, red eyes blinked up at the man for a long, silent moment.
Jack burst out laughing, cackling like a mad hen as he released all the tensions of the day through nature's best medicine.
Chase slowly joined him, beginning with a small, triumphant chuckle before continuing into full-blown laughter. It wasn't long until the both of them were flat-out cracking up, laughing like utter maniacs and clinging to one another for support.
Slowly but surely, the laughter died out, leaving the both of them smiling at each other fondly.
Jack, still grinning broadly and panting to catch his breath, a stain of pink from the mad hysterics of only a moment ago lingering upon his cheeks, spoke, "Thanks, Chase. I really needed that."
The warlord smirked proudly. "I was almost positive that you did." His eyes fell to the bowl of ice cream still upon the counter and then the banana beside it along with the rest of the fixins' before he inquired, "In all seriousness, what do you intend to do about the banana?"
The goth looked over to it as well and picked it up, removing the peel and jamming it directly into the ice cream before grabbing the whipped cream and dousing the contents of the bowl liberally with it and mimicking the treatment with the chocolate sauce. As a finishing touch, he took a single, maraschino cherry and balanced it upon the banana.
"Good enough!" he declared with a wide grin, grabbing the spoon and then the bowl. "You wanna lick the bowl when I'm done?"
"I'd much rather lick something else..." Chase purred saucily to him.
Jack's grin brightened and he scooped a spoonful of creamy, chocolatey vanilla ice cream into his mouth, licking up the bit that caught on his lips. "Sounds good," he decided, "an awesome end to a crappy day. After I finish this, though: I'm hungry."
"Hurry, then," the warlord encouraged, prowling away from the youth and towards the kitchen door. "I'll be waiting for you..."
The goth offered a wink to the man as he disappeared to their shared bedroom to await him and began eating his well-deserved treat.
While he was in a hurry to go be the thing Chase wanted to lick, the albino decided it would be best to actually finish the only food he'd had all day as opposed to just running to the bedroom as fast as his tired legs would allow.
After all, sex was most certainly better on a full stomach...
A/N: If you're wondering where this came from, this narrative of my real-life situation is all you really need to see:
"So, just now, my mom was helping me make a banana split, because the ice cream was mostly frozen and I am too weak to get it out of the carton-thing. She said, and I quote, "You're a tard, let me do it."
So, I did, and she scooped the ice cream into the bowl while I gathered the other essential ingredients: a couple of cherries, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and the banana.
Anyways, she gets a good amount of ice cream in the bowl, looks at it and exclaims, "Where's the banana?!" She sees it next to the bowl and glares at me. "Why didn't you tell me the banana wasn't in there?"
I shrug, saying, "It was next to the bowl the whole time. Why didn't you notice it?"
She says, something to the effect of, "Oh, now its all screwed up!" She then says THE funniest thing anyone has ever said in reference to a banana split, word-for-word: "What are we gonna do now, INSERTMYNAMEHERE? What the hell are we gonna do now?"
By that point, I am laughing hysterically, very nearly 'ROFL'ing.
She then realized how dramatic she'd sounded and we both started laughing like maniacs. XD
I just figured I'd share that little tidbit with you guys in case it amuses you. Oh, and if anyone's wondering, we ended up scooping the ice cream aside in order to finagle the banana in there, and it is delicious! ;P"
Silvarbelle encouraged me to turn that real-life situation into Chack and, me being me, I agreed! Hope this little tidbit was amusing to you guys! :D