A/N: This one was for a Disney quote roulette challenge at tf.n.
"Oh, it's not the first time I was tossed out of a window, and it won't be the last. What can I say? I'm a rebel." -The Emperor's New Groove
Through a Window, Falling
My name is Kyp Durron and I was just tossed out a window. Oh, it's not the first time I was tossed out of a window, and it won't be the last. What can I say? I'm a rebel. But my rebellious nature gets me into trouble sometimes. Like now. If I don't think of something fast, I'll be as flat as a Correllian flapjack. I can just hear Han calling for the syrup.
You may wonder how or why I was tossed out the window. Well there is this woman. Her name is Terris Carol and she's my wife. She is a tall, classically beautiful woman, feisty, even temperamental at times, but I love her.
She's in labor right now, pushing and breathing, trying to maintain Jedi calm during the process. But she, we, opted for natural child birth. From what I've heard and what I just saw on her face, it hurts. A lot. But we have the Force. That should solve the problem right. What Jedi, in touch with the Force, is gonna let a little birthing pain get in the way. In fact, I said as much to her only moments ago.
Thus, the falling. I should have kept my mouth shut and continued the soft, encouraging words. But, no, a particularly nasty contraction hit and Terris got belligerent, riddling me with a string of off color names. The least of which was a pulsating pimple on Palpatine's posterior. She teaches kids. Can you tell?
Given my own stress level, I lost my head at her verbal assault and returned fire. Now, as I fall, I realize I was in error. I was being selfish and not concentrating on Terris' precarious position. As a side note, Terris was just as stunningly beautiful laced with sweat and grunting as she pushed the baby…and me out the window. I sincerely hope I'll see them again.
You're probably wondering why I'm still falling. If the birth had taken place at the Jedi Temple, I wouldn't be feeling high velocity wind threatening to invade every orifice. Jedi robes, even the tunics and pants, aren't the most form fitting. But, I digress. If we were in Cilghal's birthing wing of the Healer's Ward, I might be an unconscious heap on the floor right now, rather than falling thousand of stories from an upper Coruscant hospital.
Who knew that the transparisteel window in the birthing room had a shatter point weakness, which gave way when Terris angrily Force pushed me into it.
I've been employing the Force this entire time to try and reduce the speed of my descent. Now, if I could only direct myself into a hanging canopy or drive by fruit stand I may yet survive and make it back to the hospital in time to see my son come into the world.