Have You Ever
This is my first attempt at writing a fan fiction and a songfic. Hopes it's not too bad and I've already tried my best to check for any grammatical mistakes and typos. Written English is really not my strength but after reading so many great fics I just want to try! Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: Sadly, Naruto does not belong to me. Kishimoto-sama does.
And the lyrics is from the Westlife's new album – Back Home. It's called Have You Ever
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Sakura's talking
Kakashi's talking
Kakashi's thought
Lyrics
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Sasuke has left for revenge for almost a year now and Naruto has gone training with Jiraiya, leaving a broken Sakura behind. With her love and best friend gone, Sakura has no one to turn to. And these make her turn to the one and only one constant in her life – Kakashi sensei. The two have become so closed and they've spent endless sleepless night together. It's always Sakura does all the talking and Kakashi listen intently, like this night.
'Kaka-sensei, may I ask you a question?'
'Aa.'
'…….' 'Sensei, have you ever loved somebody like I love Sasuke-kun?'
'That depends. Sakura-chan. It's impossible to measure love. You've to be a bit more specific.'
'Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry'
'I've cried because of him numerous time. Before he left for revenge , he's cold and distant. When he finally warms up a bit and I thought everything will be fine, he left. He left without even meaning to say goodbye and left me on that cold bench. I cried. It hurts so much. Every time I think about him I want to cry. Sensei, have you ever love somebody this much? Have you? '
Said jounin said never but put the now crying girl into his arms and held her gently. The petite girl cried on his shoulders. Tears stream down her face like a river. Never did the girl saw the expression on the shiver-haired man's face.
'No, I don't. I love someone so much that her tears makes me want to cry so badly but I can't. Coz I've to be strong for her. I can't cry in front of her coz she already has too much grief for someone of her age. She doesn't need an old man, like me, to make her feel even more miserable'
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
'I need him here so badly! I just want him to be here, with me, with Naruto, with you. So we can be team seven again. I need him, even if he never returns my feeling, just his presence is enough. But no, he doesn't even grant me this little wish, he just left Konoha, left team seven, left you, left Naruto, left me- just for his stupid revenge. When he left, he took my heart with him and the void inside will never be filled without him. Whenever I closed my eyes, I saw him. I can't sleep Kaka-sensei. Have you ever feel so desperate for something? Have you?'
Still, the jounin did nothing but held the girl tighter. He didn't move and his expression as stoic as ever. No one knows what's going on in his mind.
"I wish I have not. I wish. But, you know, I understand all your feelings. It hurt so much to see your love crying so hard and you can do nothing to help her. When your love is crying her eyes out, part of your heart is also dieing. I need her to be happy. I want nothing but her happiness. If the boy's return can make her smile again, I will make sure he come back, at all account, All I need is her happiness and without it, I can never lie down and sleep peacefully.'
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
'The day he left I tried so hard to make him stay. I pour my heart to them. I tried so hard! I told him I would do just anything for him. Just to make him happy! I'll try my very best to do everything for him. Everything! I mean it. I want to tell him how much I love him and I cannot live without him. Without him, life is meaningless to me. But I cannot find the right words. If I did find the right words to touch him deep enough, he would have had stayed and we can still be team seven. But the words just don't come out right. Sensei, tell me, why, can't I find the right words for him? Have you ever tried but failed?'
Have you ever have you ever
Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
'I have love him so badly! I tried everything to make him understand! Everyone see that. I love him so much that I can throw away my life just for him. I care about nothing but him. I beg for him to stay. I beg for his love. I just want him to understand how much I love him. I can help him with his revenge! I can leave with him! I'll always be there for him! Why can't him understand?'
The petite girl cried even louder and hugged the jounin on the neck, tight. She didn't pay heed to the pained expression on the jounin's face. Even with the mask on, even only an eye was shown to the world, if one pay close attention, the pain is unmistakably.
'I know, Sakura-chan, I know. It's okay.' he murmured.
'I'm in love so badly now and I'd just do anything to make my love understand how much I love her, if only she gives me the chance. I would do anything for her. If she wants her love back I would bring him back. I will give her everything she desires. I will say whatever she wants to hear. Just for her. I will do anything, just to make her feel loved and happy again.'
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything to make them feel the same
''You know what, Kaka-sensei,' the rose-colored hair girl said in between her sobs, 'when I first saw Sasuke-kun, he's already stolen my heart. At first it just because of the looks, but when we become team seven, it's because of nothing but Sasuke. I love him coz he is Sasuke-kun. And then I realized I can never have my heart back. Now, with he gone, my heart's gone too. I am no longer complete. And I just hoped, wished, he will feel the same. But maybe my love is not enough. Revenge is more important to him than anything else. I am just not enough. I am always the dead weight to him….'
And the cry turned into wail. Still, Kakashi did nothing but murmuring soft words like 'it' okay' in her ears and held her close.
'And guess what, Sakura-chan, you've stolen my heart too. If only, if only the love of this old man is enough for you and you will want my heart, I'll make you the most happy girl in the world. Everyday you will be surrounded by happiness and showered with love and care. But I know you don't want my heart. A man like me doesn't deserve someone as pure as you. So I will never tell you. Never. Even if it tear me inside, I will never tell you. '
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start
'Sensei, have you ever tried to win a heart? Can you teach me how to get me in his heart? Can you? I've tried so hard and did everything I can. I no longer know what to do…. Even if we find him again, I don't know what to say. It seems everything I do to get a place in his heart is doomed to failure.
What should I say to him?
Where should I start?'
Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
'Sensei, I've dreamed of Sasuke-kun for all my life. But I can't even look into his eyes. He just won't let me. I'm no enough. It hurts so much…'
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find the one won't give their heart to you
'Sensei, I feel so hopeless… Have you ever feel so hopeless before? Have you ever? I know my dream will never come true. Revenge is everything for Sasuke-kun. And like he said, he's already taken a different path from me… He's been gone for so long now. He will never come back, will he?'
She asked with shimmering bright green eyes. Kakashi was just not heartless enough to say the truth to such innocent eyes. Both said nothing for a moment and Sakura had ceased crying at some point.
''It's okay, Kaka-sensei. I've know long before Sasuke-kun has long lose his ability to love. He doesn't have a heart for love. His heart is filled with revenge and hatred. Maybe one day something will be able to replace it. But it is not my love, I've known that from the very beginning. Though I'm reluctant to face the truth, I just hold on to my silly wish I guess.'
She smiled a bitter smile, so different from the bright brilliant ones.
'Sakura, it doesn't suit you. You shouldn't be like this….'Kakashi said.
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the day that they will care
'I just hope that one day Sasuke-kun will come back to Konoha and then may be one day he will start to care. I just hope….' Sakura muttered, 'but Kaka-sensei, I'm so tired….'
'Then sleep. Sakura, sleep… and we can bring back Sasuke when you wake up.'
With that, Sakura fell into sleep in the Copy Nin's arms, finally having a good night sleep with no nightmares. The legendary copy-nin just held her tighter.
Have you ever, ever, ever
What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
'Cause baby I can't sleep
Have you ever
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This is the end of my very first work! Thanks for reading! Hope it's worth your time.
And if you will, please kindly click the review button! It's calling for your attention!
Till next time( if there is a next time)
FanFicHolic