Disclaimer: I don't really know what this is lol, just blowing off some steam. Please read and review!

I do not own Blair, Chuck, Serena, or the Gossip Girl phenomenon.

"You can't help it, it's just who you are... You take everything from me!"

So, S was back on top. So what? I am no longer B, as in, S and B. As far as I am concerned, this is fucking B-S. I am Blair Cornelia Waldorf, and I do not go down without a fight. In fact, I will not go down at all. Not again. Not this time. Not ever. This time, I lost. Okay, I am a big girl now. I can admit that much, along with this: I will not lose again... No, from now on, I will lose pounds, not battles.

I leaned over my bathroom counter, and took a long, rattling breath. I held it, as I watched myself, looking helpless and dumb-struck. I smoothed my hair away from my face, then sighed. I washed my make-up off, then returned to my reflection to review the real Blair; the vulnerable, insecure Blair. The Blair underneath it all. I choked back tears of frustration, as I reapplied my make-up skillfully. I made my skin look just that much more flawless, my cheeks that much rosier. My eyes brighter, my lips fuller. Pleased with my job, I placed my hair up in a neat, mature french twist. When I finished that, I placed pearls in my ears, and beads around my neck. Almost done. Dressed in a black Alice & Olivia frock, and red Manolo pumps, I got on my knees in front of the toilet, careful not to rip my dress, or scuff my shoes. I sat there for a minute or two, feeling the water swish around in my stomach, along with the contents, some of which might have been my heart disintegrated by the stomach acid. Or my sanity. Both were not in their usual place, that was for certain. Yes. It was necessary.

I leaned over the toilet bowl, stuck my index finger down my throat, and heaved with all my might. Heaved out the bad, the sin, the past, the good, Serena, Chuck, and the rest of it. Without hesitation, I got up, freshened my breath and demeanor, then reapplied my favorite Dior red lipstick. I took another deep breath, as I watched my reflection still, but it caught at the sound of a deep, loathed voice.

"So that's where you put it all." said the voice of Chuck Bass. I turned slowly to the direction of the voice, and found myself facing the doorway. I said nothing. I simply stared into his dark eyes, expressionless. I stared for what seemed like hours, then finally gathered the gumption to reply:

"What do you want, Chuck." My words were spat like venom out of a cobra, as I watched an expression form on his face. Sadness? Resign? Disapproval? Disappointment?

"To help." he said simply. I turned away, and listened to his footsteps come closer. He was behind me. I felt a cold hand softly place on my shoulder. I shivered slightly, not knowing whether it was under the cold, or his touch. "It's back?" he asked quietly.

"There is no it." I said, aware I sounded less confident than what I had aimed for.

"You are being unreasonable." he said firmly. He turned me to face him. I didn't look into his face. I couldn't. "You need help."

"There's nothing to help!" I exclaimed angrily, then slapped him across the face. "Get out." I stormed out of my bathroom, into my bedroom, and onto my bed. I lay there for exactly 3 minutes, when I felt pressure on the mattress next to me. But I did not protest this time. I kept still, on my side, hand lightly placed on my stomach. I felt another hand, warmer now, fall gently on top of my own. We stayed that way for at least an hour, when he spoke again.

"What are we going to do with you, Blair?"

I don't know...

Okay, that's all folks! Again, please review. Also, I would appreciate if you checked out my new story, (it will soon involve Mr. Ed!) the url is on my profile.

xoxo

-J