Say Huh? Karaoke
And So it Begins…
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone except Jadyn. Shelly/Kanetastic owns herself. The wrestlers belong to WWF and Vinnie Mac. Gambit/Remy belongs to Marvel Comics. Spike belongs to Joss Whedon. And that's everyone.
*-denotes singing
~~~
-JADYN walks onto a large stage, which is lit by neon lights. She is holding a microphone and is dressed in a Vegas-style evening gown-
JADYN: Hi there, and welcome to Say Huh? Karaoke. The rules are the same as MTV's version; you sing, my guest judges decide who's the best and that person wins a cool, secret surprise present! So what do you say we meet the super-secret guest judges?
-A tape of a crowd cheering plays-
JADYN: First, we have one of my muses. You may know him as The Ragin' Cajun or Gambit, but I prefer to call him 'mon ami'. From the infamous X-Men comics, Remy LeBeau.
-The tape plays again as REMY waves to the non-existent crowd-
REMY: 'Ow are you doin', chere?
JADYN: Fine, Remy. Next, another of my muses. He's a bleach-blonde vampire with a taste for villainy and the Slayer, and he's here to judge on your style. From "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", Spike!
-That damn tape plays again as SPIKE blows a kiss to the hostess-
SPIKE: Hello, luv.
JADYN: Oh, Spikey. And last, but certainly not least, she's an author who plays it naughty. Her résumé includes such steamy tales as "Take Me" and "Live and Learn". She writes as Kanetastic, but here comes your overall- performance judge, Shelly!
-The tape plays, and JADYN promptly crushes the tape-player with a mallet. SHELLY smiles and waves-
SHELLY: Hey.
JADYN: Hello, Shelly. Alright, now we have to meet our karaoke-performers. First up, he hails from Pittsburgh, P-A. He's a sissy and a wannabe, but today he's going to try and win on his own. Please welcome… Kurt Angle!
-SPIKE and REMY clap. SHELLY chants that he sucks. A real AUDIENCE, which has been herded in by six heavily-muscled, loin-cloth clad men, applauds loudly. They're fearing for their lives. Heh-
SHELLY: Boo! Angle sucks!
JADYN: Now, now children. Kurt, what are you going to sing?
KURT: I'm going to sing my version of "Stronger" by Britney Spears.
SPIKE: This I gotta see.
JADYN: Um, okay. Everyone, here's Kurt Angle singing "Stronger"!
-The lights go out, and when they turn back on, Kurt is wearing a pair of lace leggings and a bandeau-
KURT: *Hush, just stop
There's nothing you can do or say, baby.
I won the medals fair-and-square
So you can't take them away!*
*You all think that I can't make it without Vince*
*But now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger*
*Than you ever thought that I could be, baby.
I used to be your hero
It's true! You all were in love with me!*
*And you might think that your chants hurt me, but you're wrong*
*'Cause now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger*
*Here I go, to the store now
I need some milk, that tasty milk!*
*'Cause now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger!*
-KURT bows, his face flushed. The judges look at each other, making faces about his performance. JADYN takes the stage with a sweaty KURT-
JADYN: Well, Kurt, how do you feel about how you did?
KURT: I feel good about it. I feel really good about it.
JADYN: All righty then. It's time for your scores. We start with our lyrics judge, Remy.
REMY: Homme, dat was, uh, good, I guess. Remy'll give you a five, ok?
KURT: You don't know talent when you see it!
REMY: Dat was not talent, mon ami. Dat was somt'in else.
JADYN: All right, Kurt. As of now, your score is five. Let's see what our style judge had to say.
SPIKE: Mate, you have absolutely no idea how much you look like Britney Spears right now. If you were a girl, I'd call you pet, sink my teeth into you and we could have a right splendid time. But, unfortunately, you're a man. So I have to give you a three.
KURT: What?
-KURT bursts into tears-
JADYN: There, there. Now your score is eight. And we move onto our overall- performance judge, Shelly.
SHELLY: Kurt, this is the one thing I never thought I'd say, but… you look okay as Britney. And you tried hard, so you get a two.
-KURT faints-
JADYN: Okay! That brings Kurt's score to an even ten. After this commercial break, we'll have another contestant, so stay tuned!
-The AUDIENCE cheers, threatened by JADYN'S men. The screen closes on JADYN and the judges talking, with KURT lying on the floor-
And So it Begins…
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone except Jadyn. Shelly/Kanetastic owns herself. The wrestlers belong to WWF and Vinnie Mac. Gambit/Remy belongs to Marvel Comics. Spike belongs to Joss Whedon. And that's everyone.
*-denotes singing
~~~
-JADYN walks onto a large stage, which is lit by neon lights. She is holding a microphone and is dressed in a Vegas-style evening gown-
JADYN: Hi there, and welcome to Say Huh? Karaoke. The rules are the same as MTV's version; you sing, my guest judges decide who's the best and that person wins a cool, secret surprise present! So what do you say we meet the super-secret guest judges?
-A tape of a crowd cheering plays-
JADYN: First, we have one of my muses. You may know him as The Ragin' Cajun or Gambit, but I prefer to call him 'mon ami'. From the infamous X-Men comics, Remy LeBeau.
-The tape plays again as REMY waves to the non-existent crowd-
REMY: 'Ow are you doin', chere?
JADYN: Fine, Remy. Next, another of my muses. He's a bleach-blonde vampire with a taste for villainy and the Slayer, and he's here to judge on your style. From "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", Spike!
-That damn tape plays again as SPIKE blows a kiss to the hostess-
SPIKE: Hello, luv.
JADYN: Oh, Spikey. And last, but certainly not least, she's an author who plays it naughty. Her résumé includes such steamy tales as "Take Me" and "Live and Learn". She writes as Kanetastic, but here comes your overall- performance judge, Shelly!
-The tape plays, and JADYN promptly crushes the tape-player with a mallet. SHELLY smiles and waves-
SHELLY: Hey.
JADYN: Hello, Shelly. Alright, now we have to meet our karaoke-performers. First up, he hails from Pittsburgh, P-A. He's a sissy and a wannabe, but today he's going to try and win on his own. Please welcome… Kurt Angle!
-SPIKE and REMY clap. SHELLY chants that he sucks. A real AUDIENCE, which has been herded in by six heavily-muscled, loin-cloth clad men, applauds loudly. They're fearing for their lives. Heh-
SHELLY: Boo! Angle sucks!
JADYN: Now, now children. Kurt, what are you going to sing?
KURT: I'm going to sing my version of "Stronger" by Britney Spears.
SPIKE: This I gotta see.
JADYN: Um, okay. Everyone, here's Kurt Angle singing "Stronger"!
-The lights go out, and when they turn back on, Kurt is wearing a pair of lace leggings and a bandeau-
KURT: *Hush, just stop
There's nothing you can do or say, baby.
I won the medals fair-and-square
So you can't take them away!*
*You all think that I can't make it without Vince*
*But now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger*
*Than you ever thought that I could be, baby.
I used to be your hero
It's true! You all were in love with me!*
*And you might think that your chants hurt me, but you're wrong*
*'Cause now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger*
*Here I go, to the store now
I need some milk, that tasty milk!*
*'Cause now I'm stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way.
Your rudeness isn't killin' me no more,
'Cause now I'm stronger!*
-KURT bows, his face flushed. The judges look at each other, making faces about his performance. JADYN takes the stage with a sweaty KURT-
JADYN: Well, Kurt, how do you feel about how you did?
KURT: I feel good about it. I feel really good about it.
JADYN: All righty then. It's time for your scores. We start with our lyrics judge, Remy.
REMY: Homme, dat was, uh, good, I guess. Remy'll give you a five, ok?
KURT: You don't know talent when you see it!
REMY: Dat was not talent, mon ami. Dat was somt'in else.
JADYN: All right, Kurt. As of now, your score is five. Let's see what our style judge had to say.
SPIKE: Mate, you have absolutely no idea how much you look like Britney Spears right now. If you were a girl, I'd call you pet, sink my teeth into you and we could have a right splendid time. But, unfortunately, you're a man. So I have to give you a three.
KURT: What?
-KURT bursts into tears-
JADYN: There, there. Now your score is eight. And we move onto our overall- performance judge, Shelly.
SHELLY: Kurt, this is the one thing I never thought I'd say, but… you look okay as Britney. And you tried hard, so you get a two.
-KURT faints-
JADYN: Okay! That brings Kurt's score to an even ten. After this commercial break, we'll have another contestant, so stay tuned!
-The AUDIENCE cheers, threatened by JADYN'S men. The screen closes on JADYN and the judges talking, with KURT lying on the floor-