A/N: Okay, so, this is a story that started out as a little blurb, but has become this! I own nothing but the plot, it all belongs to Eoin Colfer, blah blah blah... Anyways, please enjoy, and review!

"It's okay, Holly," said Artemis nervously.

"No it's not, mudboy!" Holly roared. Holly had chased Artemis into a corner. Holly took out her Neutrino 3000 and aimed it at Artemis.

She fired. Of course, it never made it to him, for Butler had run up to them and had hit the gun, making it fly into the air, where it hit the ceiling, doing no harm. "What is going on here?" he asked, felling very much like a father of two five-year olds.

"He started it!" Holly cried, feeling very much like a five-year old.

"What did he do?" Butler said firmly.

"He read my diary!" Muttered holly, her ears growing red.

"Artemis?" Was all Butler could muster without laughing too much.

"Well, it was just lying around, where anyone could have read it!"

"It was not! It was in my pillow case, in my apartment, in Haven!"

"Like I said, lying around where anyone could have read it."

Butler coughed. "Ummm, if you don't mind me asking, what did it say, Holly?"

"Just all my thoughts and hidden secrets," Holly mumbled.

"Like the secret of your crush?" Artemis said, grinning.

"Why, you!" Holly yelled, lunging at him.

She grabbed him and started attacking, pounding and scratching.

Butler lifted her off of Artemis and said, "Artemis, where is the diary now?

"In my safe. At least I know how to keep something hidden."

"Go get it."

"Fine."

They went upstairs into Artemis' room, only to find Myles and Beckett there, reading the diary!

"Hey, Artemis! Look what Simple-toon and I found!" cried Myles, holding up the diary. "It's very intersting! It's about a fairy named Holly who lives in a place called Haven. She goes on lots of adventures with a boy she really likes named Artemis Fowl! He has the same name as you!" Then he saw Holly. "Hey, who's that?"

"Umm…" Holly said. She knew that it was too late to shield. They had already seen her.

"She's… my friend. From school. We're… partners in… the science fair!" Artemis quickly told them. "Now, how did you crack into my safe?"

"It was so easy. All we had to do was *they go on for ten minutes explaining the different maneuvers they had used to crack all twenty digits."

Artemis was so flabbergasted, he couldn't answer when Myles asked, "Artemis? Why is your girlfriend so small? And why are her ears so pointy?"

Artemis and Holly were both blown away when Beckett asked, "Is she a fairy?"

"First of all, she isn't my girlfriend. Yet." Luckily, he said the last part so quietly that only Butler could hear. Butler started snickering. "What are you laughing about?" Artemis asked, fearing not only the worst, but also the truth.

"Nothing." Butler said, a small laugh escaping. "Continue, please."

"As I was saying, second of all, all of that is none of your business, Myles. Finally, fairies do not exist. Now, leave my room at once!"

Myles and Beckett quickly ran out of the room, taking the diary with them!

"Great. Just great. Now we're back to square one. And now I'll never get my diary back!"

Holly was just about to clobber Artemis again when he suggested that Holly use the mesmer on them.

They walked into Myles' and Beckett's room, wary. Holly just wanted to get her diary back, buy a safe, and forget that this whole thing had ever happened.

"Myles? Beckett? We need to talk to you." Artemis called. No answer. They searched the room, and then the entire mansion. Still no Myles or Beckett. Then they saw a note.

"Dear Artemis Fowl,

I'm sure that you have noticed by now that you are missing something- or rather, two someones. I'm also sure that for some reason, you will want them back. I'll make it simple; you, Ms. Short, and your manservant will come to the address below, or you'll never see them again.

With love, (and truffles)

Opal Koboi from the Past and Opal Koboi from the Present."

"Oh, man. This is not good." Holly said, after a brief silence.

"What are we going to do?" Artemis muttered to himself.

"She called me a manservant." Butler growled.

Obviously, they had lost all interest in the diary.