Flip-Flops? Check.
Towels? Check.
Dog treats? Check.
Sunglasses? Check.
Art supplies? Check.
Bananas?
"Bananas?" A confused Lily Potter glanced over to her husband.
"Dunno. Probably Sirius," James Potter said, barely looking up from his Quidditch magazine.
"Probably, yeah,"
"Or," James continued, a mischievous glint in his eye, "Or it was one of your weird pregnancy cravings,"
"James Potter, you take that back!" Lily picked up a pillow and deftly tossed it at James's head.
Bull's eye.
~oOo~
Later
"I can't believe you wouldn't let me drive! I'm the only one who knows the way!"
"Lily, you're eight-and-a-half months pregnant. I'm not letting you drive."
"God, you're worse than my mum"
"I doubt that," James snorted.
"Psh. Turn left here."
"What?"
"DAMMIT JAMES, WE MISSED OUR TURN!"
"Jesus, Lily, calm down," James said, calmly turning the car around.
Lily took a deep breath, "Fine. Sorry," She then slapped James, hard, "Ah-h, that's better."
"You pack a really hard punch," James grimaced.
Lily stuck her tongue out at him, "Ha,"
~oOo~
Even More Later
"Er, Lily?"
"Hm," Lily said, absorbed in her book.
"Lily," James said, a little louder, "Li-i-ily"
"What," Lily said, finally looking up from her novel.
"Um-m-m," James said evasively.
"Get to the point, James," Lily sighed, looking back at her book.
"No! God, Lily, I think we're lost."
Lily glanced at their surroundings, "This is why you should've let me -" her voice broke off abruptly, her voice tightening slightly.
"What?" James said tartly, "Gonna yell at me more? Uh, Lily?"
Lily was bent over in pain, "Contraction," she managed to mutter.
James's eyes bugged out, "HOLY SHIT!"
Lily whacked him on the shoulder, "Shut up and find a -" she gasped, "FIND A FUCKING HOSPITAL!"
It took two hours. Two hours to find a hospital that Lily could properly give birth in. By then, her contractions were growing closer together, and with each one, Lily grew more and more foul-mouthed.
"This is all your fucking fault, James," she huffed once, "All your stupid, fucking fault."
James ran into the hospital, "Wife … in ... labor," he panted.
"Level 3," The attendant looked extremely bored.
James dashed into the elevator with Lily waddling along behind him.
Ding
Once Lily was safely in the maternity ward, James blew a big breath and contacted Sirius, Peter, and Remus.
"WHAT THE FLYING FUCK," Was Sirius's response.
"Hm. I'm on my way," Was all Remus said.
Peter never picked up.
A nurse poked her head in the waiting room. James leapt up, and the nurse shook her head, "Nothing yet. Do you want to see her?"
James warily crept into the room.
Lily was lying on a bed, looking very red in the face. Luckily, there wasn't a contraction at the moment.
"Dammit, James," Lily smiled tiredly, "Hold my hand, ok?"
Mystified, James took her hand. Moments later, his hand was purple and Lily was screaming, "Ow-w-w!" he yelled, attempting to detach his hand.
"Oh, you're not going anywhere, dipshit," Lily growled as another contraction ripped through her.
James nearly sobbed with relief when Sirius and Remus knocked on the hospital door, "Be right back," he told Lily, successfully removing his hand from her grasp.
Once out of the room, he breathed a sigh of relief, "Ow,"
"Hey man," Sirius peered worriedly at James, "You ok?"
"Um. Lily has a really strong grip," James admitted, laughing a little.
"How many minutes between each contraction?" Remus asked, all business.
"10, maybe? 5?" James said, scratching his head.
Remus marched into the room Lily was in.
"So-o," James said, casting a glance around the room, "How about godfather?"
"Sure," Sirius said, looking at the tiles beneath his feet, "Wait, what? Seriously?"
"Yeah," James cracked a grin, "Lily and I discussed it a while ago and we think you'd be good at it, what with your cigarettes and sleeping around and everything,"
Sirius laughed dryly, "But seriously, why?"
"Eh. It was Lily's idea. Ask her," James said, "Nah, we though you were a really good person for it – I've seen you around other kids."
Sirius looked at the door intently, "Damn, I thought I was being vague."
"You can't do vague, Sirius. You once went up to a girl and asked, 'Wanna shag?"
"Heh. She splashed her drink in my face," Sirius said, chuckling slightly.
"Good times, good times," James nodded.
"Boys?" The nurse poked her head through the door, "She's almost there."
"See you on the other side, bro," Sirius waved as James stood up.
"Oh, hell no. You're coming with me," James yanked Sirius in through the door.
Inside was relatively calm, except for Lily's screming. Remus was chatting with a nurse with short, bubble-gum pink hair who looked a couple years younger than him. He looked up, "Hey. Lily's almost there," he turned back to bubble gum-nurse.
Warily, James turned to look at Lily. Well, Lily's face. He did not want to see what was going on below.
Lily was a mess. Her hair was plastered to her head with sweat and her face was a blotchy red.
"Hey-y, Lils," Sirius smiled awkwardly.
"Shut up or I will cut you. James, hand,"
James cautiously put his hand in her's. It was slick with sweat, but that didn't stop her from gripping onto his hand like her life depended on it.
"Ok, Lily. Push!" One nurse said forcibly.
James looked away from the gore he felt was going to erupt soon. Needless to say, there wasn't any gore.
About twenty minutes later, the nurse was examining something pink-ish red, "It's a boy!" She announced, carrying the baby over to a sink to wash him and swaddle him.
"Give him," Lily demanded, holding out her arms expectantly. Gingerly, the nurse placed the baby into Lily's arms.
"It looks like a potato," Sirius said, peering over James's shoulder. Remus whacked him, "Hush up, you moron."
Tentatively, James patted his son on the head.
"Harry," Lily said, holding her son close.
"What? I mean, he does have hair but he's not -"
"No, his name. Harry" Lily said, smiling slightly.
"I still don't know why you didn't call him Sirius," Sirius called from by the door.
"Shut up, Sirius, you're already godfather," James yelled back. Turning back to Lily, he said, "Harry's perfect. Harry James Potter." (They had already decided on a middle name).
"Perfect," Lily said, kissing James on the cheek.