Finding Out
"I'm pregnant."
The two words that I had been mustering up the courage to speak for about two weeks now finally escaped my lips. I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I didn't know how he would react, and I wasn't exactly looking forward to figuring it out. I waited. Finally, I got impatient and had to look at him. His topaz eyes had a look about them that I'm not even sure how to describe. Confusion mixed with utter devotion.
"Say something? Anything?" I pleaded with him while gently stroking his clenched fist.
"You. Um. Bella, we talked about this. You can't be..." I cut him off before he finished the sentence.
"I know we talked about it, but apparently it is possible because it's happening!" I said those words a little bit more frantic than I meant to.
He broke eye contact with me and started staring blankly at the wall. I could tell that he was thinking about it. Trying to fit the puzzle pieces together, and getting frustrated with each passing second that he couldn't explain the mystery.
"Look, Edward." I tried to make my voice soft. "I don't know how it happened or why, and for the moment I really don't care. Please stop thinking so hard and just talk to me. Please."
"Bella, Bella, Bella. A baby? Two months of marriage and we're already having a child? And I thought I couldn't even have children. Hm. Love, I'm very happy about this. Honestly, I am. But I'm also extremely confused and a little bit worried. Can you understand that?" His fist was slowly easing up and his face wasn't so tight anymore. Talking things out always seemed to help him relax.
"Worried? Are you kidding me? I've been freaking out for the past two weeks. Thinking about becoming a mother. Getting huge. Actually having the thing." I shuddered at the thought. My fear of giving birth accounted for approximately 50% of my reasoning behind never wanting children. The whole process was just gross and intolerable to think about. "And confused? Trust me Edward. I am beyond confused."
As soon as I finished speaking, he picked me up and placed me into his lap. He didn't say anything as he softly stroked my hair and pressed his lips against my forehead, and I knew why. He was absolutely, completely, and shockingly terrified. And I was scared too. After all, I was only 18 and was about to become a mother to a child that couldn't possibly exist. Yet, the child did exist and Edward and I were going to have to come to terms with this. As Charlie would say, we would both have to "man up", put on our brave faces, and prepare ourselves for the biggest challenge in our (or my) young lives.