Disclaimer: Don't own any of the characters or events in FFVII. That's why this is fanfiction.

A/N: Inspired by the events of early Disc III, obviously. An excuse to do some soul-searching, an excuse for shameless fluff, and an attempt to share the sadness I always seem to feel at this stage of the game. Goes like this: Cloud, Tifa, Barret, Red XIII, Cid, Yuffie, Vincent, Reeve. I've saved the longest, and my favourites, for last.

REASONS WHY

Part I: Apple Core

This waiting... this waiting is driving me crazy. Crazier than I am. I just want to go, to fight. Battle is my playground. But I promised them that I would give them a day. A day to deliberate their reasons to stay. A day to clarify for themselves why they were willing to die in the service of the Planet.

I didn't need a day. I had spent the entire journey wondering why, and finding the answers as I went. Now that the time to finish it is upon me, it's all remarkably clear, like the crystalline water of Aeris' final resting place.

She's a reason. Of course she's a reason. I followed her blindly, protected her with all my ability, because it was what I wanted to do. Now I'm going to take revenge for her death, because it's what needs to be done.

Not for her. She wouldn't want revenge; she's too pure for the concept to appeal. It needs to be done because I want him to pay for the pain he's caused to me, and for ending her life that way. She should have died an old granny with twelve kids and fifty grandchildren. Not like that, suddenly severed from life like an apple plucked from a tree. Like one of Midgar's innumerable roaches and the big boot from the sky.

Sarcasm doesn't sit well with me.

Tifa's watching me. I think I know her reasons. She's been trying to tell me ever since this began, those hopeful, hopelessly beautiful eyes following me endlessly. Maybe she'll manage it one day. Long before I do, I'm sure.

Maybe she'll manage it just before we die. That'd be nice, in a weird, macabre sort of way. I wouldn't have any opportunity to screw anything up before we all went to the Lifestream together.

That's a stupid way to think just before a battle. I have to stay focussed. I don't think we have a chance. But for the sake of the Planet... for the sake of everyone on it... for the sake of my memories and the blood on my hands, I have to try.

Those are reasons enough for me.