Chapter 1

Jess's POV

It was a party. I was supposed to have fun, right? It was the last day of junior year and I needed to unwind. What with all of the college application stress, making sure that my extracurriculars were up to par, and wedging time into my schedule for video chats with Darcy. He is coming back from Dartmouth this summer and staying with his family for all 3 months of summer. I am beyond ecstatic to see him. But right now I just need to relax and enjoy the party happening around me. Darcy may not be here but Emma was. I spot her across the room and make a beeline towards her.

"I was wondering where you disappeared to," she says nonchalantly.

"Just trying to clear my head," I reply.

"Dartmouth would be stupid not to accept you," she says. She knows that I am anxious about getting into Dartmouth and that I applied for 3 reasons:

Darcy goes there, and we would be going to college in the same place for two years. That is, if I get accepted.

I really liked the campus and feel at home there, especially with Darcy around.

Darcy.

"Hopefully," I say solemnly. I take a sip of the beer from the red plastic cup. It tastes odd, not like any other drink I have tasted before. Emma suddenly realizes that its not iced tea that her best friend is drinking.

"Why are you drinking beer?!" she yells over the incessant thumping of music.

"I'm just trying to unwind a bit. This is my first and last," I reassure her.

"Sure," she says as she takes the red plastic cup from my hand and places it down on the glass coffee table.

As she looks up from the coffee table she stops in her tracks. She wrinkles her nose as if she smelled something rotten.

"What? What's wrong?" I ask. She just nods slightly to something behind me.

I turn around and see Jonas, our farmhand's younger brother. Who is, quite honestly, a good looking and smart guy, but I would never go for him. Why is he here in Concord?

I quickly turn around to avoid catching his gaze. I remind myself that I have a boyfriend, the sweetest one, who I didn't even tell about what happened at the lodge with him. It's not like anything happened happened. He was just flirting with me, and it was harmless. And me, with a broken leg and not able to join in any of the fun things everyone else was doing, flirted a bit too. Not because I liked him - not too much - but because he was the only one that I had to talk to. Still, I was afraid that Darcy wouldn't see it the same way. I thought, why bring it up? Darcy and I were happy. I did not tell him and I do not plan on ever telling him. Jonas is just Jonas, and flirting is just flirting. I did nothing wrong, or so I have told myself.

Completely lost in my reasoning for technically lying to my boyfriend, I didn't even notice Emma having a spasm in her face trying to warn me that Jonas was coming over. Next thing I know he's standing next to me.

"Hey Jonas!" I say, trying to sound enthusiastic, instead sounding drunk. Am I drunk? I look down at my hand and find that a cup has made its way back into my fingers - an empty cup.

"How have you been?" he yells back eagerly.

"Good. What are you doing here in Concord?" I have to scream over the Muse song blasting all over the house.

"Josh wanted me to come and stay with him for a while," he states. "Afterwards he wants me to get a job and get enough money for my college fund."

"Oh." I try to change the subject - anything besides college tuition. "So, how do you like the party?"

He shrugs. "There's drinks, at least."

Emma stares him down, her dark eyes daring him to offer me another beer. He does just that, and I accept. Maybe if I drink enough, I can pretend that Darcy is with me instead of Jonas.

Emma squeezes my hand and tells me she's going to find a bathroom.

"Please don't leave me with him," I murmur to her. Jonas catches my eye from across the room at the beer cooler and grins. I half-grin back.

"Just don't have another beer, ok? I'll be right back."

"Fine."

Emma elbows her way into the mass of sweaty bodies and disappears.

Jonas's POV

I'm in a room surrounded with people but all I see is her beautiful blond hair. I see her quickly turn around and notice me, but she turns around again to face her friend - Emma? I can't tell if Jess is excited to see me. I know she felt something for me at one point, but she had Darcy Hawthorne. Bummer, she is really beautiful, especially with her shining blue eyes and silky hair.

I try to make small talk, but something else seems to be on her mind. Probably her boyfriend. I wish it was me, but Jess probably has her pick of guys that have fallen for her. Darcy is lucky, I hope he treats her right.

Our chat lulls and Jess's gaze drifts off me. If this is what conversation is going to be like between me and her, I'm starting to doubt I have even the tiniest shred of a chance with Jess Delaney.

I lean in closer to her so that I don't have to burst a lung yelling over the clamor. "Are you alright?"

Jess fiddles with the end of her blonde braid. "I've been better. Stressed, is all."

"Alcohol helps."

Jess tips her cup back. "Hopefully."

Jess's POV

The next hour - or two, or three, who knows? - its all a blur. A knot twists itself in my stomach, head spinning like a carousel. I sit up, slide my shoes on and trudge downstairs where the music is still pounding at full volume.

Emma, where are you? She went to the bathroom, but.. When was that? Hours ago?

I slowly push myself through the crowd and find the back door. Fresh air greets me as I slip out, and I sigh. Before I think better of it, I slump onto the grass.

"Jess?"

For a moment, I panic. But the voice isn't deep enough to belong to Jonas. A hand rests on my bare shoulder.

"It's Emma, can't you tell?" Emma helps me off the ground. "God, you're wasted."

"What… a party.. Are all of them this.. bad?" I mumble.

"I'll drive you home," Emma offers, but it's more of an order than a request.

She probably hated the party more than I did. I forced her to go because I thought we could enjoy it, but Megan is in Paris designing masterpieces as we speak. Cassidy is probably sleeping, and Becca... well, who knows, but I wouldn't particularly want her company anyway. So it was just me and Emma.

Suddenly I realize: "My parents will… they won't like this."

"You can sleep over. And you're gonna need me to help you with your nasty hangover in the morning."

When we arrive at the Hawthorne's, Emma's parents are already asleep. A couple minutes after collapsing on Emma's bed, I notice someone at the foot of it. In my drunken state, I almost scream. But I see that curly hair and that height and hear his deep deep soulful voice say:

"Hey Jess. I missed you."

I suddenly get a burst of energy and leap into Darcy's arms.

"Darcy! Oh… my gosh," I say as I lift my face from his shoulder, "when did you get home?"

"Just in time to see my beautiful girlfriend," he replies mellowly.

I tilt my chin upward so that our noses graze. His lips are soft and warm, and I kiss them. His arms wrap around my waist and pull me in closer. I missed Darcy and his kisses so much. My mouth has the leftover taste of booze, but I push the thought to the back of my head. I smile at him as we separate. He smiles back at me. I look behind me, expecting Emma to be standing in the doorway looking triumphant. But she is nowhere to be found, again, giving Darcy and I some time alone. Thanks Em, I think, as if she can hear me.

Darcy sits on the bed and I lay down and place my head on his lap, getting sleepy again. We talk for a while, and the words spill out of my mouth like a steady stream. My eyes grow heavy and I drift off. All I remember is looking up into Darcy's eyes, and seeing a mixture of pain, hurt and anger. What did I say?