Oftentimes he lay confined in his feathered bed at night, thinking to
himself, How could one person be this handsome? Night after night he
pondered over the question, and night after night he was unable to come up
with a suitable response. His beauty, recognized and feared by all, was
otherworldly.
***
As he stepped into the Great Hall the next morning he could not help but notice that, all modesty aside, he was the most handsome bloke in there. He proceeded to position himself between Blaise and Pansy in such a way that the morning light discretely brought out his natural, pale highlights. Draco Malfoy grabbed Flint, with all his might kissed him on the lips, and turned to look at Harry. Across the hall, Harry took a bite out of his chicken and gently licked Ron's nose. Ron turned a shade of crimson not yet witnessed by human eyes. Harry felt he had to explain "You had something on your nose, there," he said knowledgably.
***
"Mister Malfoy," yelled a furious Professor McGonnogal, "twenty points from Slytherin - I told you to tone down your good looks! The students cannot possibly concentrate!" Draco winked at McGonnogal and brushed up against Hermione on the way to his seat. Hermione in turn passionately ruffled Harry's hair and then hit him hard across the face. McGonnogal turned to face Draco and forced her heaving bosom in his face. "I'll see you after class" she added briskly, as an afterthought. "You'll have to excuse me, Professor" Draco objected, "but I'm already due at Dumbledore's for a . . . spanking. . . I've been a very naughty boy these past few days, you know." McGonnogal backed away slightly and started mumbling through grinding teeth. Draco could swear he heard the words "sex slave."
***
"Professor, I'm here for my . . . erm . . . punishment" Draco announced as he strolled casually into Dumbledore's office. The thin strands of light coming in through the office's only window illuminated his sculpted features. He noted a pair of handcuffs lying solemnly on the floor. "Professor? I am equipped and ready to go," Draco tried again. It was then that he distinctly heard a whip snap somewhere in the dangerously dim room. This would be a long night.
***
Draco flung open the door to Crabbe and Goyle's dormitory and walked in with a determined look gracing his glorious features. He found Goyle seated naked at his desk. "Milord," Goyle exclaimed, "what brings you here?" Draco put an immaculately manicured finger to Goyle's lips. "Hush, child," he said. He paused. Finally, he decided to cut to the chase. "Would you call me a god?" he inquired. To show the gravity of the matter, he took of his shirt. Goyle fainted. Something underneath Goyle's desk fainted. Draco decided it was time to just walk away.
***
Back in his dormitory, Draco looked at himself in the mirror. Through careful deductive reasoning, he had already decided that he was so terribly good looking and had such a large following that he easily qualified as a god. And because he was a god, he was immortal. Logically, being immortal granted him the ability to fly without a broomstick. Draco jumped out of the nearest open window.
***
"What was that?" Hermione yelled, startled, "Neville, did you see an awfully large, yet amazingly hot, bird jump out of the window?" The boy simply shook his head. Hermione calmed down a bit. "Good," she said, "neither did I."
***
As he stepped into the Great Hall the next morning he could not help but notice that, all modesty aside, he was the most handsome bloke in there. He proceeded to position himself between Blaise and Pansy in such a way that the morning light discretely brought out his natural, pale highlights. Draco Malfoy grabbed Flint, with all his might kissed him on the lips, and turned to look at Harry. Across the hall, Harry took a bite out of his chicken and gently licked Ron's nose. Ron turned a shade of crimson not yet witnessed by human eyes. Harry felt he had to explain "You had something on your nose, there," he said knowledgably.
***
"Mister Malfoy," yelled a furious Professor McGonnogal, "twenty points from Slytherin - I told you to tone down your good looks! The students cannot possibly concentrate!" Draco winked at McGonnogal and brushed up against Hermione on the way to his seat. Hermione in turn passionately ruffled Harry's hair and then hit him hard across the face. McGonnogal turned to face Draco and forced her heaving bosom in his face. "I'll see you after class" she added briskly, as an afterthought. "You'll have to excuse me, Professor" Draco objected, "but I'm already due at Dumbledore's for a . . . spanking. . . I've been a very naughty boy these past few days, you know." McGonnogal backed away slightly and started mumbling through grinding teeth. Draco could swear he heard the words "sex slave."
***
"Professor, I'm here for my . . . erm . . . punishment" Draco announced as he strolled casually into Dumbledore's office. The thin strands of light coming in through the office's only window illuminated his sculpted features. He noted a pair of handcuffs lying solemnly on the floor. "Professor? I am equipped and ready to go," Draco tried again. It was then that he distinctly heard a whip snap somewhere in the dangerously dim room. This would be a long night.
***
Draco flung open the door to Crabbe and Goyle's dormitory and walked in with a determined look gracing his glorious features. He found Goyle seated naked at his desk. "Milord," Goyle exclaimed, "what brings you here?" Draco put an immaculately manicured finger to Goyle's lips. "Hush, child," he said. He paused. Finally, he decided to cut to the chase. "Would you call me a god?" he inquired. To show the gravity of the matter, he took of his shirt. Goyle fainted. Something underneath Goyle's desk fainted. Draco decided it was time to just walk away.
***
Back in his dormitory, Draco looked at himself in the mirror. Through careful deductive reasoning, he had already decided that he was so terribly good looking and had such a large following that he easily qualified as a god. And because he was a god, he was immortal. Logically, being immortal granted him the ability to fly without a broomstick. Draco jumped out of the nearest open window.
***
"What was that?" Hermione yelled, startled, "Neville, did you see an awfully large, yet amazingly hot, bird jump out of the window?" The boy simply shook his head. Hermione calmed down a bit. "Good," she said, "neither did I."