1. Arise, Fair Sun

In which a drunken Will feels his inner poet (and Nico's dick)

"Will, stop abusing your voice box."

"I did not live until todayyyyyyyyy—"

"Gods, for just one second, could you just calm down and think about the grievous impacts those sounds have upon the humanity?"

"How can I live when we are parted?"

"Ah, stop—hahha, stop singing, damn it."

"Tomorrow you'll be worlds away, and yet with you, my world has started."

"William, do not continue to tickle me, you bastard—do not…"

…

"Oh, Hades. Thank gods you stopped."

"'Shall I compare thee to a midsummer's day?'"

"Will, why? Can I have a 'no' and a 'go away' in Shakespearean?"

"'A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.' And thou art but a flower, with 'love's light wings.'"

"Could we have some normal foreplay for once, Solace?"

"Tribulation from thy lips of doom? From whence blossoms and bosoms bloom?"

"'From my lips the sin that they took.'"

"'Take all myself!'"

"Shh! It's too early to throw yourself onto the bed."

"It is the east, and Nico is my sun, ah, and um."

"Ha, you forgot, didn't you? To be or not to be, that is—ah, good, normal foreplay. That is… oh fuck, nice."

"Yeah? You'll see nice."

"Oh, Will, only you would be drunk and still be this hardworking."

…

"Was that a yes?"

"Son of a minotaur, shit, fuck fuckingmerdaohgods—do you want me to curse so loud?"

"Yeah? I might be still drunk. Sing, my angel, sing for me!"

"You will not go—fuckingshit—phantom on my ass… ah, ah Hades. We'll wake the neighbors!"

"... Will? Are you laughing down my dick?"

"Why? Is it working?"

"That's it. Your alcohol privileges are revoked. I'll tell your siblings. Kayla'll go apeshit on you."

"Whhhaa? No, turneth thy back, fair lady! Uh, I don't know, uh. 'That's my alcohol!'"

"And is this your bottle?"

"...Fuck, that was awful… please keep going though. Oh, Hades below—do more of that. Yesyesyes, Nico!"

…

"Arise, fair sun!"

"What?"

"'Arise fair sun, and kill the envious mon, who is already sick and pale with grief, that thou her maid art far more fair than she: be not her maid, since she is envious,' and then something about shedding your green virginity!"

"That's what you forgot? You compared me to a maiden shedding her virginity? Which is green?"

"I, uh. Forgot the rest of it. Yeah. But I can do 'O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou—'"

"Solace, spare my ears."

…

"Wait, do you think I'd remember more if you did that thing with your tongue again?"

"Is that a challenge?"

"Only if you want it to be…"

"Hah, when did you get so smooth?"

"Since my father."

"Will, we will not be talking of the actual sun during sex."

"Was that pun intentional?"

"Idiot, stop abusing your vocal chords and let me blow you."