He wanted to lose himself in those eyes.
He wanted to lose himself in those eyes. They held and reflected everything he wanted to be. He saw the best of himself and the best of his world in those eyes. He wanted to lose himself in those eyes, even as they were slipping away forever.
He struggled against his captors, he shouted and raged. But he could do nothing. He was powerless.
"Your precious woman is about to die. If you don't act she'll bleed to death, all that blood right before your eyes"
Her eyes had been so shy and cautious when they first met. But there was strength in them, even then. They knew loss and pain from a young age, but still there was hope and determination.
Those eyes had been so hopeful when he shared his dreams. She had trusted him with secrets and power. They had talked of making the world a better place.
He'd used her. He'd betrayed her trust and abused her gift of knowledge. He could try and justify it forever. Just following orders. But he had still killed hundreds and destroyed a people with the hope that had been in her eyes.
He'd seen the disappointment and horror in those eyes when she learnt of his betrayal.
Seen them become the eyes of a killer.
Now those eyes were dying. She was dying.
He knew he could do what was asked of him. He could open the portal. He knew enough to try, even though he shouldn't. And he knew how he could be driven by grief and loss to act unspeakably. How close he had come to losing himself, losing everything, and she alone had saved him from himself.
He could not, he would not betray her again. He would not let her be used to force him to become a pawn in their horrific plan.
"Weather you like it or not her fate is up to you now Colonel Mustang. Do you want her blood forever on your hands?"
Her fate. It was never up to him. She had always chosen her own fate. Chosen to share her secrets with him. Chosen to fight with him, chosen to follow him. She was fiercely determined in her choices and she would choose now.
"Colonel, please, you don't have to do this. Don't sacrifice everything for my sake."
And still he was locked in those eyes. Those eyes, fading now, but still fighting. Still so strong, fighting to be strong for him.
There was nothing else now. Just her. He had a choice, and this time he wouldn't betray her. He wouldn't lose her to his own fear and grief. He would do the impossible.
He wanted to lose himself in those eyes, even as they were slipping away forever.
"Alright. Alright, Lieutenant, I won't perform the transmutation."
AN - Such an awesome moment in the story. I hope this works.
Please check out the gracious andrastes_grace on AO3 who I was subconsciously channelling when I wrote this, and her work "Royai Week 2016", especially Chapter 7.