May contain spoilers. This is a short part but I promise it should get better
'I know you Ruth, you're a walking car crash a pain in the backside, but you're not a bad person.'
His words rang in her ears as she sat on the bus on her usual root home. She couldn't help but feel guilt about her actions as she had 'Once again' been selfish towards Jay. She slumped in her seat at the thought of Jay she could see the desperation in his eyes, the eyes that had melted her heart as he pleaded with her to help him. But once again she had surprised Jay; she had done another unforgivable thing and all for the sake of her career.
When she reached her dark and lonely apartment she sighed at the sight of her messy kitchen as she flickered on the light and poured herself a single glass of well needed wine. Her mind flickered back to when she and Jay shared good times in here. The time he made her eggs the best eggs she had ever tasted to put it that way and when she had the first sigh of their baby being real.
Jay was such a good boyfriend he treated her with respect made her life bright for once, but all she did for him was take way the chance to be a father and now ruin his career. She couldn't do it, not to him he didn't deserve it. She resolved she would get the notes and find out the truth for Jay, the man she loves.