I really don't know from what part of my brain this story came from. Suffice to say, I love writing for Kazu, he's such a lovable idiot. Altough I'm sure Rika would be quick to disagree.
I do not own Digimon. If I did, it wouldn't be suitable for children... or most adults. Enjoy!
'Dude, I swear, she'll have one in here somewhere. All women have one.'
'Kazu, I don't know whether you're demented or just a pervert.'
'Kenta man, I swear to god, we'll find one somewhere. I'll search her closet and dresser, you go look under the bed or something.'
'You do realise Rika is going to kill us if she finds out we're in her room.'
'Yeah dumbass, that's why I got Ryo to distract her while we searched.'
Kenta sighed as Kazu started rooting around in Rika's closet. He didn't know why Kazu kept convincing him to partake in his harebrained schemes or why he went along with them so easily but here he was, once again trying to placate Kazu's infinite stupidity. Kenta remembered back to something Henry had once said about his best friend. Most people's thought progression goes 1, 2 and 3, as simple as that. Kazu's thoughts, however, go 1, 2, Banana, Elephant, 69.
Kenta didn't know why Kazu had got this latest thought in his head but he put it down to Kazu spending far, far, far too much time on the internet. Kazu had sent him hundreds of links to hugely disturbing websites over the years. In fact, Kenta was sure he was on some kind of government watch list somewhere thanks to his friends actions.
'It's got to be in here somewhere,' Kazu muttered to himself.
'Where did you get this idea from Kazu?' demanded Kenta.
'Honestly,' replied Kazu, 'Some woman's magazine. It said, and I quote, "no woman is complete without one".'
'What the hell were you doing reading a women's magazine!' asked Kenta.
'Dude, I wasn't reading much,' Kazu replied bluntly, 'There's just a lot of pictures of women in their underwear.'
'You really are a pervert.'
'Hey, I'm a hormonal teenager! What do you expect me to do!'
'Exert an element of self control perhaps!'
Kazu scowled at Kenta before moving onto searching Rika's drawers having found nothing in the closet.
'Okay…' Kenta started, 'I said before Rika would be pissed if she knew we were in here. I'll state again, she will crucify us, especially if she finds out you've been searching through her UNDERWEAR DRAWER!'
'Will you keep the noise down!' hissed Kazu. 'She'll only kill us if she finds out we've been in here. If you'd quit whining and help me look we'd have been out of here by now.'
'Screw you! I only agreed to act as a lookout.'
'Which, by the way, you don't seem to be making much of a job of!'
'The floors are all wooden! I can hear if someone's coming.'
Kazu chose to go back to searching rather than continue the argument. 'Argh! Nothing else in the drawers. Did you check under the bed like I asked you to?'
'Erm, no,' replied Kenta.
Kazu dived onto the floor and shoved his head under Rika's bed. Seconds later, he let out a cry of triumph.
'AHA! I told you all women had one!'
Kazu stood up holding the objective of the search with pride whilst Kenta merely stared wild eyed at it, too shocked that Kazu was right in his presumptions, to react.
'Let's have a look shall we,' said Kazu with barely disguised joy, 'Hmm? 'Bout 10 inches, in black, battery powered; Rika's got good taste.'
Kenta couldn't believe his eyes. Overall, the feeling he had inside was intimidation. If Kazu was right, and women really did all have one, it pretty much rendered men pointless. Not many men could measure up to that thing. Kazu's triumph was short lived however. Both boys suddenly froze when a third voice announced itself.
'What are you two doing in here?'
Kazu and Kenta turned towards the door to see the only person they feared being caught by more than Rika. Well, I say person…
'Hehe, hey Renamon!' Kazu chuckled nervously as he put his hands behind his back to hide the object from view. 'We were just, err… browsing.'
'What are you hiding Kazu?' she asked with a threatening undertone to her voice.
'What? Me, hiding something? I've never heard something so ridiculous in my life.'
'Kazu,' growled Renamon.
Kazu decided for his own safety that he probably shouldn't lie anymore to the much stronger than him Digimon. He gulped and slowly brought his hands out from behind his back. Renamon stared at the object he was holding, her facial expression impossible to read. Eventually, she stepped forward and grabbed it out Kazu's hands.
'Where did you find this?' she asked with an eyebrow raised.
'Erm, under the bed,' Kazu replied with a shaky voice.
Renamon took one last look at the object she was holding before looking back to Kazu and saying, 'Hmm, I was wondering where I'd left this. Thank you for finding it for me.'
With that, Renamon turned and walked out of the bedroom leaving two very confused tamers. And in Kazu's case, slightly aroused.
Hehehe, this story went through so many versions. Initially I had them accidently searching Rika's mother's room and finding a vibrator (that's what they found by the way, if you didn't figure it ou). But then I thought actually, Kazu would probably like that just as much, she is a model after all. Then I had them finding one in Rika's grandmother's room, but that disturbed me quite a bit. And then hey presto, turn it into Renamon's, still slightly disturbing but also quite funny. I'm just waiting to see what my brain comes up with next. See you then!
